hi everyone. it was my birthday weekend and just like gentle, things were going so well i thought my h would make the decision to come home as well. i didn't even get an i love you. but i did get lots of blessings anyway. h decided to stay with me and the kids all day saturday and spent the night too! the next morning he came to church - two in a row. the Word is planting seeds. i praise God for that. when he first moved out and confessed about the ow i wanted us to talk to someone - he refused and i never mentioned it again. of course i meant Godly council. anyway,out of the blue on saturday he said "i know who we can call for their opinion - i would respect" it was an unsaved old friend, that had known us forever, but had not talked to for several years. her and her h had split up and i never knew the reasons or details. At first i started to argue - but i held my toung (amazing) i said sure , why not. Agree, agree, agree. for all i know she could have been the wayward spouse and is happy in aduldtry. but i trusted God and when my h told her we were thinking about splitting up what did she think about it.<BR>Praise GOD, she said that when they broke up - she had an om and it took her 2 yrs to realize that she made a big mistake and the grass is not greener. there was not a day that went by that she wishes she had her h back. wow. (now i can help her restore her marriage - i had been praying for someone to help).<BR>well , that is why i am smiling. because the rest of the weekend i stayed at his place . we had fun - but when i drink i get sad and talk tooooooo much.<BR>so he said somethings that hurt and wouldn't have been said if i didn't ask. i don't think i did too much damage - though , because when he dropped me off he said he enjoyed my birthdy and was sorry i didn't get what i wanted. oh well. <BR>my prayers are with you gentle tomorrow in your aniversary. may God give you a clear vision of your restored family that you can keep in your heart and pull out whenever satan comes around. the one that i defeat him with is a vision of my h giving a testimony about how God worked to restore our marriage.<BR>and also to ted - please don't contact her. it is soooooo hard, i know. but i struggle with the same . i was always in control (retired cpa) and this is the first time in my life i have none. i am stepping out of the way today and letting God take over. i will not call, i will not cry(in front of h), i will not manipulate, i will not lie, and i will quit saying i'm sorry. <BR>when you all get down you can think of me and laugh. i wear a wig (just finished chemo) and when ever h comes around without calling, the kids and i have worked out a signal for me to run in and get my hair on. They don't know he moved out. they just think it's a game. <BR>i'm sending arrows to heaven for all of you! <BR>
