We can surely pray for an end to all kinds of violent behavior. That is not good in anyone's eyes, and surely not in God's eyes. We should pray for all the violent people, including this man, so that God will turn their hearts to Him.<P>I also pray for you, that you may forgive your attacker, in time. I also pray that you will read the Gospel of John. Have you already read it? Do you have a Bible?<P>Remember that the way to destruction is wide and the road to salvation is narrow. This is to teach us that there is no "safety in numbers" when it comes to our actions and thoughts. We are individually responsible for what we do on all levels. The Lord teaches us that to love Him is to obey Him. How do we obey Him if we don't know Him? We can get to know Him by reading His Holy Word.<P>I think in your heart you realize that an Open Marriage is not really a marriage that God would want you to have. That's why you mention all the other people who are in your situation and why this attacker has outraged you beyond the attack itself. He has put a doubt in your mind about the meaning of this type of marriage. The New Testament is clear that any lust (even just a thought of it) outside of a marriage between two people is adultery. <P>These are hard words for you today, because your heart is divided. You feel the Lord calling you but the strength of old ways and beliefs and the power of "friends" is strong. You do have to make a choice. I pray you will make a choice for the Lord and submit to Him. Ask Him for forgiveness and strength and ask Him to send you help in the form of another Christian woman, a pastor or a priest to help you on your new walk. Once you get used to climbing the mountain, you'll see how much fun it can be. Most of all, you'll see how the Lord can purify your heart and give you Life inside, where Death and anger once reigned free.<P>I am not judging you as a person at all - I have no idea who you are. We are all sinners - all have fallen short of the glory of God. But the Lord has called us as He is calling you. He has great plans for you and the closer you are to understanding His plans for you, the more real, lasting joy you will find. Are you willing to try? We can help you - we are not here to judge anyone, believe me, we are all full of mistakes and none of us is here because of merit - just the grace of God who shows no favoritism in these matters.<P>We would all be so happy if you were to join us. Pour out your heart and the Lord will bless you greatly. He will unbind your chains one by one, as He continues to do for each of us.<P>I hope to hear from you again soon. Take care of yourself.
