Hello,<BR>I am new on this site. I was just browsing the web site and ran across this web site. I have read a lot of interesting topics. My prayers are with all of you. I am asking for anyone that believes in God and believe his will be done in my life to help me understand why I can not move on with my life. I am a 35 year old female, I was married for only 2 years and in those 2 years the Lord bless me with a beautiful baby girl, by my husband. I shall never forget on the day of our anniversary when I told him, his comments where just, Oh!. And we had been praying and asking God to bless us with a child. This is my first child and my first marriage. <BR>I started figuring out that my marriage was falling apart when he got a pager and from there he started working late, then he would have to go work on Sunday's and he never wanted to work on Sunday's. I never stop trusting him, but I did approach him and asked him was something going on that I needed to no about. He said everyting was fine. My annivesary was in July 1999 in August 1999 he said he did not want his marriage anymore. I was four months and I was completely stunned. I tried to talke with him but he would not talk, he said that I aggervated him. So I stop communicatin with him unless he called. I was under so much pressure until I had to be restricted from work and put to be bed. The only income that I had was mine. He never came to any of the Dr.'s appointments, he never called just to see how I was doing are anything. And if he did call he would call and just say that things could not work out. <P>So in December 1999 I asked not to call anymore because it was to much of strain on me and the child. So far I was doing good. I found out later the lady that I thought was messing around with my husband, that told me to my face that she was not, was seeing my husband, they had moved in together. I continue to work part-time and my hours had been shorten by employer because of health reason. My child was due March 1st my last day at work was January 31st. <BR>I managed to get the baby nursery and everything ready, He did not contribute to any of this. I 5 days past my due date March 1 2000. I had made up in my mind I was not going to call him, I left to go to the hosiptal and my sister contacted him and did show up to my surprise. Shortly after 14 hours of labor and I delivered, he left. He did show any kinda of concern or happiness about the birth of our child.<P>I did not hear from him any more, When I did arrive home, I had a message on my voice mail that my employer did not need me anymore and that the poistion that I had was no longer available. I did not have a job to return to, my benifits were terminated immediatly and I did'nt have anything, all my savings were put into my child nursery, I lost my home, I lost everything. As time went Nvember of 2000 he married the young lady that was a memeber of the church we both attended and that he was living with. I still have not been able to understand what is going on and why. This young lady was married as well. They both filed for divorce at the same time.<P>I love my husband, When I found that I was completely destroyed, He has not had a relationship with his daugheter since she been in the world. He did not come for her first baptism, first thanksgiving, first christmas, and the saddest is he missed her first birthday party. <P>I feel like my husband made a decision of allowing the devil to destroy his marriage. To make this topic short. I still love my husband, not because he is the father of my child, but because, I felt that when I prayed to God and asked him to bless me with a husband, he blessed me with this man. I do believe that God knows what is best for me. I have tried to move on with my life as well as trying to block memories and my ex-husband out. But each day I am reminded of him. I finally got a call from my ex-husband and he wanted to see the baby, but he wanted to take somewhere, which means away from me. I don't really don't trust him with her by his self. I bascially told him that I have not had problem with yu having a relationship with his daughter and that I have no problem with him coming to get her. The only problem I have is that you have a wife that betrayed me and I will not allow my daughter to be around her. After I made that statement, he hung the phone up in my face. And to this day I have not heard from him. In my mind I said I hope I did the right thing.<P>It has been 1 year since our divorce. I have not met anyone nor have I been involved with anyone, because my heart is still with him. <P>I want to be happy, feel my happiness is with him. Our child does not even have a relationship with him to no who he really is. Because I think of him all the time. And you would think a year is enough time to aleast heal a litte.<P>Did I make the right decision<BR>A cry for Help!!<P>

My heart goes out to you. I still can't understand how someone you once loved so dearly can treat you so awful. Betrayal is hard, believe me I know. I'm dealing with it right now! There will be those times when you wonder if you are believing and hoping for the right things. The best advise I can give you is ask God to give you strength to take it one day at a time. Only God knows what is best and only he knows the end. He can see things that we cannot see. Focus on yourself, take time for yourself and your daughter. She needs to see you happy. Reflect on the person you use to be before you married your X and find that person again. My prayers are with you

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by But God:<BR><B>My heart goes out to you. I still can't understand how someone you once loved so dearly can treat you so awful. Betrayal is hard, believe me I know. I'm dealing with it right now! There will be those times when you wonder if you are believing and hoping for the right things. The best advise I can give you is ask God to give you strength to take it one day at a time. Only God knows what is best and only he knows the end. He can see things that we cannot see. Focus on yourself, take time for yourself and your daughter. She needs to see you happy. Reflect on the person you use to be before you married your X and find that person again. My prayers are with you</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>I just wanted to replay and let you no, That I appreciate your comments. Each day my pray is God will be done. I struggle everyday to make it through. I ask God not to let any of my unhappiness fall on my daughter. And so far she is the happinest, healthy baby I have ever seen. I am blessed everyday that I see her smiling face. But in the back of my mind I still feel that I can't put all the blame on him because, A man will be a man, you make your own decisions, But I really tend to blame her because me and her were members of the same church and we grew together in that church. She new that I was married and she was married as well. 2 wrongs do not make it right. But my mother has always taught me, you do not mess with someone elses husband or wife. "But God" she told me to my face that she would not do that she has alot of respect for me and my husband. She is not that type of person. And she said that she admired how I was toward my husband. So I am hurt by him but I am so angry at her because she had a chance for (15 years to have a marriage) and she destroyed mine in 2 years.<P>Trying to hold on to the little santiy that I have is becoming very then. I love him and miss him so much. Most of all his child does not no he is.....

It is too bad that time doesn't stand still when life gets like this. I am afraid of what the future holds we're not getting any younger. I have been implementing Plan A and I will continue implementing Plan A. Somedays are okay, others are pure hell. I Pray that God gives us all strength and foritude to carry on. Help us to think scripturally and be positive throughout the day. Help us to realize that we are not responsible for our mates behavior. Help us to remain in your will. Thank you God for your blessings that you bestow upon us. Thank you for your grace and your son, Jesus. Father, Please help us! <BR>

Jesus, please lift this woman and her baby up in Your arms. Let them feel Your loving Divine presence. Let them stay close to Your Sacred Heart. Lord, You gave her this love that has managed to stay alive through all of this. Bless her and let her feel blessed. Show her Your will. We know You hate divorce and You particularly hate adultery. Please restore this marriage according to Your will. Amen.

Dear believe n God, I know the feeling of betrayal. Do you still go to that church? Obviously the spirit of the Lord has departed from that church. Your ex H and his new significant other wont be able to have any joy or happiness in there marriage. Any good feelings they had are probably gone by now, even with hardend hearts. I would highly recomend you check out Rejoice ministries.http://www.rejoiceministries.org/index.html<BR>Sign up for charlyne cares email devotionals. Charlyne went thru what your going thru and her husband is part of her ministry also. Her husband remarried and she never stopped praying for the restoration of there marriage and he eventually came back and had quite a story to tell about how miserable he really was married to the other woman. He could feel the affects of Charleynes prayers and eventually he came back to her and there children. Its a wonderful testimony of the power of prayer and the Lord. Right now, you really need to draw near to the Lord and have a close relationship with Him. The Lord will help you thru this. Ask the Lord to help you forgive both your ex H and significant other. Its very important that you do this. Just be willing and God will do the rest and give you the strenth and it will come from your heart eventually. I believe God withholds judgment until we truly forgive. And it would be my hope and prayers that the other womans marriage to her ex would also be restored. Pray for that, and im sure that would help you to forgive her. If they are Gods children, they will only grow worse with conviction inside until they break. I myself had to do some serious forgiving. I wont go into it, but if i hadent forgave the other man, i would be sitting in prison. Instead He is sitting in prison. He was a drug dealer meth junkie. Trust in the Lord and not the circumstances. The Lord is on your side, He hates divorce and he hears your prayers and cries.<BR>As far as im concerned and i could back it up biblically, God doesnt even acknowledge your ex's marriage. Reason being you are standing with the Lord to restore your marriage to him. God will honor that above all else. Dear Lord i pray you would lead my sister into all truth of your will for her life and give her the strenth from you Jesus to carry it out and trust in you Lord and not the circumstances. Give her your peace Lord that surpasse's all understanding and i pray Lord, that your name shall be glorified in my sisters life and that nothing is to hard for you Lord to handle. You are a God of restoration. We put our faith and trust in you Lord. In Jesus name, Amen<BR>Mark

Mark,<P>Thank you so much for your positive attitude and your openess. God has away of sending his people to people that need strength and guidance. I have been out for a week and I spent time with my beautiful daughter. God brought us closer together and I feel like I am a good mother. I pray each and everyday that the lord will be done in my life. I asked him to humble me and make me strong in areas where I need to be. Mark I really have been touch by your letter.<BR>You asked a question were we all still attending the same church. No we are not, they left before they thought everyone would find out. Me and her grew up in this church together. The testmony of Charleyne was wonderful. I pray each day that God would restore my marriage. <P>Mark in all honesty I still try to work that it out for myself. I will trusting God fully, but I feel like I am not being patient enough. I want it to happen fast. Pray that I find patient and learn to wait on the Lord. Thank you for that pray.<P>Keep in touch and I will to.

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lostpup:<BR><B>Dear believe n God, I know the feeling of betrayal. Do you still go to that church? Obviously the spirit of the Lord has departed from that church. Your ex H and his new significant other wont be able to have any joy or happiness in there marriage. Any good feelings they had are probably gone by now, even with hardend hearts. I would highly recomend you check out Rejoice ministries.http://www.rejoiceministries.org/index.html<BR>Sign up for charlyne cares email devotionals. Charlyne went thru what your going thru and her husband is part of her ministry also. Her husband remarried and she never stopped praying for the restoration of there marriage and he eventually came back and had quite a story to tell about how miserable he really was married to the other woman. He could feel the affects of Charleynes prayers and eventually he came back to her and there children. Its a wonderful testimony of the power of prayer and the Lord. Right now, you really need to draw near to the Lord and have a close relationship with Him. The Lord will help you thru this. Ask the Lord to help you forgive both your ex H and significant other. Its very important that you do this. Just be willing and God will do the rest and give you the strenth and it will come from your heart eventually. I believe God withholds judgment until we truly forgive. And it would be my hope and prayers that the other womans marriage to her ex would also be restored. Pray for that, and im sure that would help you to forgive her. If they are Gods children, they will only grow worse with conviction inside until they break. I myself had to do some serious forgiving. I wont go into it, but if i hadent forgave the other man, i would be sitting in prison. Instead He is sitting in prison. He was a drug dealer meth junkie. Trust in the Lord and not the circumstances. The Lord is on your side, He hates divorce and he hears your prayers and cries.<BR>As far as im concerned and i could back it up biblically, God doesnt even acknowledge your ex's marriage. Reason being you are standing with the Lord to restore your marriage to him. God will honor that above all else. Dear Lord i pray you would lead my sister into all truth of your will for her life and give her the strenth from you Jesus to carry it out and trust in you Lord and not the circumstances. Give her your peace Lord that surpasse's all understanding and i pray Lord, that your name shall be glorified in my sisters life and that nothing is to hard for you Lord to handle. You are a God of restoration. We put our faith and trust in you Lord. In Jesus name, Amen<BR>Mark</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><BR>Mark,<BR>Thank you so much for your positive attitude and your openess. God has away of sending his people to people that need strength and guidance. I have been out for a week and I spent time with my beautiful daughter. God brought us closer together and I feel like I am a good mother. I pray each and everyday that the lord will be done in my life. I asked him to humble me and make me strong in areas where I need to be. Mark I really have been touch by your letter.<BR>You asked a question were we all still attending the same church. No we are not, they left before they thought everyone would find out. Me and her grew up in this church together. The testmony of Charleyne was wonderful. I pray each day that God would restore my marriage. <P>Mark in all honesty I still try to work that it out for myself. I will trusting God fully, but I feel like I am not being patient enough. I want it to happen fast. Pray that I find patient and learn to wait on the Lord. Thank you for that pray.<P>Keep in touch and I will to.<P><BR>