I can take it no more I want to stop hurting: <BR> <BR>The attack of satan is so strong, I was sitting here at my desk at work and recieved a phone call and the phone call went like this. Why did'nt you tell me that your ex-husband and his new wife has a new house? I told her I did'nt no and at that point all of what I was standing, praying, trusting and believing left. Just 2 weeks ago, My ex-husband called me and asked me to have dinner with him and bring the baby. And I agreed. We had a very good conversation and his conversation went like this. I want to apolize for what has happened in the past and for hurting you. ( Remmeber (in one of my post topics What do I need to do to get my husband back. I told you that he married a women whom I have known for sometime, that was married for 15 years and she divorced her husband and married my husband). Then he went on to say that he could not change what he has done but asked that I forgive him and we move on. He wanted to become parents together to raise our (my)daughter together. He went own to say that he felt that he did not try to save his marriage but he went own and did what was best for him. He said that he still love me and cared for me and was willing to do anything for me and the baby.But he also said that he could not leave his wife because he could not hurt her this would be wrong for him to do. He said he is willing to do what ever to make sure that me and my child would notwant for anything. (No he is not paying any child support nor is his spending time with my child).<P>I told him that I do forgive him because this is right in the Lord. The hurt and pain that I have been through I am still trying to heal from that. He asked could he take the baby with him on the weekends? I told him that I still could not allow that to happen, because your wife that call me and told me that she was not involved with you, has be traded my trust for her. It has nothing to do with you , but I just cannot have her around my daughter because she hurt me and destroyed my family. He said that was personal between me and her. He agreed to what I said about having my daughter around his wife, I told him that he could always come and get her anspend time with her as much as he wants, but if I found out that he had my child around his wife, then and only then he would not see her again. He asked me why was I so mean towards her. I told him if the shoe had been on the other foot and did that to her she would feel the same pain that I did and still feeling. But you would not understand, because you said you did what was best for you. And that meant leaving your wife and your family to be with someone elses wife. After making that statement he said that he was praying for me. The sad thing and I can not get pass is that my ex-husband professes to be a called man of God (he is a minister), how can he stand before God's people and preach and teach on marriage, family, etc., And do not fear God. Oh! yes they lived together before they got married, matter of fact they were together the hold time I was pregnant and not once did he support me.<BR> <BR>I have tried, cried, prayed, beg, and did everything I feel that I could humanly possible to get through this and believe that God will answer my prayers. It is not about them getting a house it is not even them being married anymore, it is the fact that he woke up one morining and decided he did not want a marriage are a family and it hurts to no you went out 4 months later and married again, but the sad thing is he does not even care of enough to even try to have a realtionship with his child. But make sure that he r children have everything, and these kids father still see and spend time with them. <P>Right now I am feeling real bad in my spirit. <BR> <BR>I do not no what to say, do, think, are believe anymore. I wish this hurt and pain would just go away. I do not want to feel like this anymore, I want to be happy. Her ex-husband is getting married August 11, 2001 and my ex-husband would have been married for 1 year this year 11/01. <BR> <BR>It is hurting so bad, my heart,my mind and my spirit. <BR>I just neede to share this with someone so I would not have to keep it in. <P><BR> I have prayed to many prayers, I have asked the Lord to change me, I cried to many tears, but yet I can't let this man go. Not because I have a child with him, but because I made a vow, I said the words, I gave the pledge, I gave a ring, I took a ring, I gave myself, I trusted GOD, and said the words, and meant the words... in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in good times and in bad.<P>But I just can't not stop HURTING. WIll I ever have happiness again.<P>Please pray a special prayer for me that I might grow stronger in Gods word as well as in faith.<P>Thank you for listening.<BR>

Oh Sweetie - you are incredible.<P>I think you are right that your ex-husband is a false minister. The enemy loves to get the clergy first because then he can take down the congregation with less effort.<P>You are right to stand and not get remarried. Can you turn your hurt into concern for their souls? This couple is still living in sin. Divorce is wrong. Adultery is wrong. You are the one who is right. And there can never be even a HUMAN excuse for not taking care of your children. Your husband's soul is in great danger and so is that of his ex-wife, no matter how they try to smooth it over.<P>I agree with you 100% that this woman should not see the child. Stick to that. However, your husband should pay child support and should have a relationship with his own flesh and blood. He must be a very proud man to be so wrapped up in himself that he forgets a daughter.<P>If you feel depressed and can't get over it, I do suggest you take antidepressants for a little while, just to get your brain used to being happy again. It's very important you be strong and happy for your daughter. Let your husband go and think of him once or twice a day in prayer. Build your life in the Lord, helping others and raising your daughter to be a Christian rock like you and your happiness will be so much greater than you can imagine. The peace of the Lord beats any human relationship by a thousand.<P>Stay with us and God bless you.<P><BR>

I feel your hurt. Honey, I hope you see it, Satan got to your H and now he's going after you (with your faith in God). I went through something like this and I actually felt like God and Satan were fighting over me. Please fight it.<P>I read one of those cute 'God' signs yesterday that fits this, it says:<BR>I know God won't give me more than I can handle, I just wish he didn't trust me so much!<P>I will be praying for you.

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Tryingtohope:<BR><B>Oh Sweetie - you are incredible.<P>I think you are right that your ex-husband is a false minister. The enemy loves to get the clergy first because then he can take down the congregation with less effort.<P>You are right to stand and not get remarried. Can you turn your hurt into concern for their souls? This couple is still living in sin. Divorce is wrong. Adultery is wrong. You are the one who is right. And there can never be even a HUMAN excuse for not taking care of your children. Your husband's soul is in great danger and so is that of his ex-wife, no matter how they try to smooth it over.<P>I agree with you 100% that this woman should not see the child. Stick to that. However, your husband should pay child support and should have a relationship with his own flesh and blood. He must be a very proud man to be so wrapped up in himself that he forgets a daughter.<P>If you feel depressed and can't get over it, I do suggest you take antidepressants for a little while, just to get your brain used to being happy again. It's very important you be strong and happy for your daughter. Let your husband go and think of him once or twice a day in prayer. Build your life in the Lord, helping others and raising your daughter to be a Christian rock like you and your happiness will be so much greater than you can imagine. The peace of the Lord beats any human relationship by a thousand.<P>Stay with us and God bless you.<P></B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><BR>Thank you so much for listening. I needed that, I am really trying to move but each everytime I pick up my bible it reminds that God does not honor divorce and that inJeremiah 31:16-17 keeps my hope and faith going that my husband will return. I never stop believing in him, and trusting for his return to his family. It's like you said Satan is trying to attack me. But when I went to my devotional reading today I found a ray of hope Psalms 37. And I am asking that if we both pray that Satan would not take away what I have praying and asking God for. I have forgiven my ex-husband and I am still asking God to give me the right frame of mind and heart to forgive her. And I believe he will. Today I am doing much better but I miss him.<P>Thank you so much.<BR>

We are all with you. You do sound better.<BR>Hugs from across the ocean - T

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by believe n god:<BR><B> <P><BR>I wanted to write please read:<BR>I saw him this weekend without our child. I thought he was calling to see his child but he said he wanted to see me. We went out and we had a good conversation and the conversation went like this. He said that he has alot of things going on and that he was tired and there was no peace in his life. I told him that he would not find that peace that he needs to be free from whatever it is that is hindering him. I told him also that I am praying for you as well as your ministry and I will add that to my prayer when I pray. He said that he still loved me and cared a great deal about me. And that what we do is our business and he asked that I keep whatever we do to myself. he also said that he wanted to call my brother just to talk but he no that he has ill feelings toward him as well as my family. I told him that I never ever once heard my family members say that the hate him or dislike him are wish I never met him. The only thing that has been said is that they hated they way you did your wife and child. How you just abandon us. As time has gone bye, my mother said as well as my family, they have forgiven and moved on but they have always wanted me and you to be together. He did have much to say on that. Then he went on to say that his wife really,really, really, loves him and she is not going no where. Out of the conversation we were having I never once heard him say that he loved his wife. And what's so funny is at that moment I begin praying and asking God to touch my husband mind and heart and forgive him for his sins. Then he went on to say that he can not be in a marrige that he is not happy in and if he is not happy he moves on and don't look back. Then he went on to say that he does not no what the further holds but right now he is looking for us to be freinds and see what the further holds. I told him right now I would like that, but the fact still remains that my child will not be around your wife. <P>It's like this if the wife is married to now I did not no when they first I might have been okay with him taking my child around her. But since I do no this person(wife) and what she did to me then I just can't get pass it. This women destroyed my family and I will not let her be apart of my childs life. It is enough I will probably have to explaine to my daughter why her father was not are did not want to be apart of her life. Irefuse to have to deal with this women.<P>I made it back home about 1:30am in the morning. He told me that he wish I would not put strings on him are label him as a boyfriend,lover,etc... lets just be freinds. I told him that is okay. I said to myself that I am praying that you would find whatever is you are looking for, because right now I really feel he really don't no what he looking for. If he was to call me right now and ask to come back I would take him back. Am I stupid?<P><BR>

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Tryingtohope:<BR><B>We are all with you. You do sound better.<BR>Hugs from across the ocean - T</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>I saw him this weekend without our child. I thought he was calling to see his child but he said he wanted to see me. We went out and we had a good conversation and the conversation went like this. He said that he has alot of things going on and that he was tired and there was no peace in his life. I told him that he would not find that peace that he needs to be free from whatever it is that is hindering him. I told him also that I am praying for you as well as your ministry and I will add that to my prayer when I pray. He said that he still loved me and cared a great deal about me. And that what we do is our business and he asked that I keep whatever we do to myself. he also said that he wanted to call my brother just to talk but he no that he has ill feelings toward him as well as my family. I told him that I never ever once heard my family members say that the hate him or dislike him are wish I never met him. The only thing that has been said is that they hated they way you did your wife and child. How you just abandon us. As time has gone bye, my mother said as well as my family, they have forgiven and moved on but they have always wanted me and you to be together. He did have much to say on that. Then he went on to say that his wife really,really, really, loves him and she is not going no where. Out of the conversation we were having I never once heard him say that he loved his wife. And what's so funny is at that moment I begin praying and asking God to touch my husband mind and heart and forgive him for his sins. Then he went on to say that he can not be in a marrige that he is not happy in and if he is not happy he moves on and don't look back. Then he went on to say that he does not no what the further holds but right now he is looking for us to be freinds and see what the further holds. I told him right now I would like that, but the fact still remains that my child will not be around your wife. <P>It's like this if the wife is married to now I did not no when they first I might have been okay with him taking my child around her. But since I do no this person(wife) and what she did to me then I just can't get pass it. This women destroyed my family and I will not let her be apart of my childs life. It is enough I will probably have to explaine to my daughter why her father was not are did not want to be apart of her life. Irefuse to have to deal with this women.<P>I made it back home about 1:30am in the morning. He told me that he wish I would not put strings on him are label him as a boyfriend,lover,etc... lets just be freinds. I told him that is okay. I said to myself that I am praying that you would find whatever is you are looking for, because right now I really feel he really don't no what he looking for. If he was to call me right now and ask to come back I would take him back. Am I stupid?<P>

NO! believe in God, you are NOT stupid..you have been horribly hurt. I can't believe your H is in ministry still. That must be a terrible disappointment to you as you see him abandoning God's call to be a good father and abandoning you.<P>I was a minister along with my H till just recently. I am the WS but thankfully the Holy Spirit gave me a nightmare that helped me to really wake up literally to my foolishness and H was incredible in his forgiveness.<P>Being a WS does not make me side with your H at all. This is terrible what he is doing to you and others are right--if your H won't lift a finger or spend a dime in child support and besides that, just out of respect to you, you have every right to forbid his new W to stay away from your daughter. He has made you a single mom and is forsaking his responsibilities. <P>So glad you are really seeking God through the Word and prayer. You are on the right track and you will find helpful advice here, too. And prayer support.<P>I will be remembering you. I am away for the weekend but hope to find your post again on Monday to help me pray in an informed manner for you.<P>Blessings.<P>------------------<BR>Fresh Start

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by freshstart:<BR><B>NO! believe in God, you are NOT stupid..you have been horribly hurt. I can't believe your H is in ministry still. That must be a terrible disappointment to you as you see him abandoning God's call to be a good father and abandoning you.<P>I was a minister along with my H till just recently. I am the WS but thankfully the Holy Spirit gave me a nightmare that helped me to really wake up literally to my foolishness and H was incredible in his forgiveness.<P>Being a WS does not make me side with your H at all. This is terrible what he is doing to you and others are right--if your H won't lift a finger or spend a dime in child support and besides that, just out of respect to you, you have every right to forbid his new W to stay away from your daughter. He has made you a single mom and is forsaking his responsibilities. <P>So glad you are really seeking God through the Word and prayer. You are on the right track and you will find helpful advice here, too. And prayer support.<P>I will be remembering you. I am away for the weekend but hope to find your post again on Monday to help me pray in an informed manner for you.<P>Blessings.<P></B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Thank for those kind words. I only wanted to no if I was doing the right thing about my daughter not been around his W. The main thing is I have forgiven his W for what she did to me but I cannot have my child in the midst of what my ex-husband is doing. As I read my bible I read Do not fret because of evil men or be envious of those who do wrong. For in due season they reap if the faint not. Psalm 37:1.<P>But I still love him inspite of what he has done to me. And I would take him back. My pray for him everydy is that the Lord create in him the right spirit and renew his mind. This is my prayer. <P>So pray with me that the Lord take control of his mind and his heart and do a wonderous thing in his life.<P>Glory be to God <P>

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by very hurt:<BR><B>I feel your hurt. Honey, I hope you see it, Satan got to your H and now he's going after you (with your faith in God). I went through something like this and I actually felt like God and Satan were fighting over me. Please fight it.<P>I read one of those cute 'God' signs yesterday that fits this, it says:<BR>I know God won't give me more than I can handle, I just wish he didn't trust me so much!<P>I will be praying for you.</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>I wanted to let you no I saw him this weekend without our child. I thought he was calling to see his child but he said he wanted to see me. We went out and we had a good conversation and the conversation went like this. He said that he has alot of things going on and that he was tired and there was no peace in his life. I told him that he would not find that peace that he needs to be free from whatever it is that is hindering him. I told him also that I am praying for you as well as your ministry and I will add that to my prayer when I pray. He said that he still loved me and cared a great deal about me. And that what we do is our business and he asked that I keep whatever we do to myself. he also said that he wanted to call my brother just to talk but he no that he has ill feelings toward him as well as my family. I told him that I never ever once heard my family members say that the hate him or dislike him are wish I never met him. The only thing that has been said is that they hated they way you did your wife and child. How you just abandon us. As time has gone bye, my mother said as well as my family, they have forgiven and moved on but they have always wanted me and you to be together. He did have much to say on that. Then he went on to say that his wife really,really, really, loves him and she is not going no where. Out of the conversation we were having I never once heard him say that he loved his wife. And what's so funny is at that moment I begin praying and asking God to touch my husband mind and heart and forgive him for his sins. Then he went on to say that he can not be in a marrige that he is not happy in and if he is not happy he moves on and don't look back. Then he went on to say that he does not no what the further holds but right now he is looking for us to be freinds and see what the further holds. I told him right now I would like that, but the fact still remains that my child will not be around your wife. <P>It's like this if the wife is married to now I did not no when they first I might have been okay with him taking my child around her. But since I do no this person(wife) and what she did to me then I just can't get pass it. This women destroyed my family and I will not let her be apart of my childs life. It is enough I will probably have to explaine to my daughter why her father was not are did not want to be apart of her life. Irefuse to have to deal with this women.<P>I made it back home about 1:30am in the morning. He told me that he wish I would not put strings on him are label him as a boyfriend,lover,etc... lets just be freinds. I told him that is okay. I said to myself that I am praying that you would find whatever is you are looking for, because right now I really feel he really don't no what he looking for. If he was to call me right now and ask to come back I would take him back. Can you tell me what's going on with this man. Should go along with what he is saying and kep praying that my change will come or has my change come?<P><BR>

I am not a minister but I do completely agree that you shouldn't put your child in a sinful situation and that means keeping her away from the bad influence of this other woman.<P>I don't know what I'll do if I ever hear that my daughter meets this OW but as long as I can stop it with the help of the Lord, I will.<P>Stick to your guns. It sounds like you are breaking through to him gently - he is slowly waking up. God bless you.<P>