Hi everybods,<P>I just wanted to post a quick praise report<P>It's a long and meandering story, but I thought some people might find it interesting.<P>I spoke to my wife on the phone a couple of days ago. She was kind of in a wierd mood and being quite flippant, almost like she was showing off as she was in the car with the OM and his buddies.<P>I asked about her day, she said you are being really nosey. I said you ask about my day. She said yeah, but i'm not really interested, i'm just being nice. This really annoyed and upset me, I was on the verge of LB-ing big time but I managed to put the phone down in time!<P>I really hated the way she had spoken to me and blamed the OM for what I thought was his influence in making act this way. However, rather than go off on one I managed to calm down, and then prayed to the Lord that he might forgive her for being so rude, and forgive me for the angry thoughts I was having. Once I did that I really felt a sense of calm, and the anger seemed to fade away.<P>Two days later ...<P>I am in the car with my wife taking her with the last of her stuff to the OM's place. She tells me that after she got off the phone, the OM asks her "why did you leave your H he always makes you laugh .. i just don't understand why you left". This came as a bit of a shock, I don't remember making her laugh!?! She just carried on the conversation to say that we get on better than we ever did when we were together. I make the point that it wasn't always like that.<P>This was followed by my W really wanting to talk about things, it gave me the opportunity to explain the faults I had in our marriage and that it wasn't entirely her fault. I spent a lot of time working away during the week and when I came back i wass often tired and grumpy. I was resentful of the fact that my wife wanted to do things with me and I was just tired.<P>My wife and I continued to talk, more than ever before as we drove. I explained to her I would never have been in this position had I not really got close to God and really let him forgive my hatred towards th OM, and the resentment towards my wife. I explained that by doing this I was able to get rid of my resentment and treat people, not just her, in the same way regardless of the way they treat me.<P>She said she saw so many good changes in me, but not in herself and that I was the innocent party. I expalined it takes two to make a marriage. I didn't meet her EN's by working away, that was my descision. I put money as a more important need than actually being there for her ... what a fool. Shame I can only see that now! (Working away increased my salary over what I could earn locally) I'm not taking the blame entirely, i'm just saying there are important needs in her that i was missing.<P>Towards the end of our journey, we ended up stopping at a service atation for food for an hour, she asked me a couple of questions which i thought were strange:<P>She asked: "Do you think we will always be in contact?"<BR>My reply: "You are th most important person in my life and will always be"<BR>She said: "I don't know why I don't deserve it"<P>She asked: "Do you think i'll end up a lonely spinster?"<BR>My reply: "No ... not if I can help it, i'll always be there for you"<P>If anyone has any clue to what these questions mean I would like to know, especially if you were / are a WS.<P>Weel that's my story for the week. Very disjointed as usual ... but hopefully it will make some sense. I also wanted to point out that I missed out on a weekly prayer meeting I go to. I phoned the guy who runs it to say that I couldn't make it. I also explained to him my whole situation, as I had never told the him before - about my W the Om etc. I had always just asked for prayer for the renewal of my wife's faith!<P>Well, some might say this is coincidence, but at the time my wife was opening up to me and acknowlegding the changes in me was exactly the same time there were more than three people praying about my marriage for the first time.<P>My prayers are with you all. Hope you all have a good w/e.<P>Plec.

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>She asked: "Do you think we will always be in contact?"<BR>My reply: "You are th most important person in my life and will always be"<BR>She said: "I don't know why I don't deserve it"<P>She asked: "Do you think i'll end up a lonely spinster?"<BR>My reply: "No ... not if I can help it, i'll always be there for you"<P>If anyone has any clue to what these questions mean I would like to know, especially if you were / are a WS.<BR><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Hi, Plec. While I'm not a WS, but just a "poor, suffering" BS, but I'd like to take a stab at this....from a female's perspective.<P><BR>Number 1: I believe there are moments when the fog lifts, and she begins to "see" you for the ROCK you are being for her. First question relates to her not wanting to lose that stability in her life. BUT she feels TOTALLY unworthy of your love, devotion, care, etc.<P>Number 2: Second question sounds like she's envisioning a day when she WON'T be with OM, and is hoping you will still be there, as she's feeling afraid that she will have messed up everything and will end up all alone.<P>I think I can see some sunlight (or is it SONlight?) poking out through the clouds??? HANG ON!!! She's coming around....just keep Plan A'ing!!<P>Lupo