Hi - <BR>Today I wrote the letter saying that I didn't want a lawyer and I wanted my H to decide how much he thought was fair to give me, according to his own idea of justice.<P>I know it was right in my heart. I also asked him for custody of my daughter if he was sure he wanted the separation, but I didn't leave out the idea it could be joint and asked how he thought that could benefit our daughter.<P>I am so sad today, because he still wants to separate from me. I know that the fog is lifting as far as the OW goes but he is adamant about separating from me.<P>Also, I don't like my job, which has changed. I live far away from the city where there are more jobs but I don't want to uproot my daughter and I love her school (it's Christian.) I feel like I'm in a Catch-22. I really need some help tonight. I hardly ever cry but I am crying right now - so frustrated. I don't know if the Lord wants me to look for another job or stay put. I wish He would talk to me and I don't trust myself to follow Him although I am doing my best.<P>Please remember me in your prayers. I really really need help. I don't want to get depressed and I'm afraid of that too. I know I shouldn't worry and I usually don't. I just don't trust MYSELF and I don't have a lot of energy to try to look for another job. In my heart, I want to work for the Lord, because I do feel we are almost in the End Times or at least a radical change. I want to work to bring people back to God, and not work to sell things, which is what I am doing.<P>I would appreciate any scripture ideas or any uplifting words. Thanks.

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Tryingtohope:<BR><B>I wish He would talk to me and I don't trust myself to follow Him although I am doing my best.<BR></B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Trying,<BR>I have felt the way you do many, many times. He WILL speak to you. All you have to do is "Be still, and Know that I AM God."<P>Whenever I am NOT SURE which way to turn, or which decision to make, I DO NOTHING until I AM sure. You can do that now, and be fully assured it is the right thing. When I am running out of patience, and I get confused as to which way to turn, I just CLING to the cross, and WAIT there until I get a clear leading. Hope this helps!<P>If you have peace about what you wrote to your H in the letter, then just let God have it, and work with it. Hard, I know. <P>Father,<BR>Please comfort Tryingtohope right now. Lord, WE are your children, and as a loving God we know You do not desire to withhold any good thing from us. BUT as your children, we know that your timing and chastening is for our benefit, even tho it never feels like it at the time.<P>Help her, and all of us, Father, to TRUST to totally - to see that YOU ARE in control, and that You will is going to be done! Praise You, Lord Jesus, that You know all Your sheep, and they know Your Voice. Help Trying to hear Your soft, still voice in the swirling confusion in her head, so that she can hear you say, "This is the way, walk in it...."<P>Thank You, Father, that You are all-knowing and we don't have to navigate this mess all on our own. Thank you, Father for the best gift of all, our salvation, and thank you for giving us ALL good things in their time, if we are obedient children. Praise You, Lord! Your ways are above our understanding. <P>We pray through our Lord and Savior - Jesus Christ.<BR>Amen<P><BR>

Hi Trtingtohope,<P>You did the right thing with your letter. You just added $1000 to your H's love bank. It could have been so easy for you to LB right now. I know it's tough for you ... my wife has also moved out and requested certain items. I wanted to keep everything as I felt like it was part of something we had created, I thought it be tarnished by being in place with the OM.<P>Don't be scared, God is definately with you. God does answer things that are in his will, and I truly believe that marriage is something that God definately wants to save. Remember 'what God has put together, let no man seperate' ... it was only Moses that requested divorce and God only allowed it out of the coldness of mens hearts. Remember that when you are low, and tired that this is something that God wants to mend!<P>Apologies if what I have quoted isn't word for word, but i'm sure you get my point. Have faith that God will answer your prayers according to his will. And i'm sure that it is his will to restore marriages not tear them apart.<P>Don't despair ... as lupo says we are usually just 5 mins from a miracle when everything is at it's worst.<P>Just to let you know. I felt such pain of my wife moving stuff out and leaving, but within weeks things haven't been as rosy as previously thought. So I hear things like "maybe i'll come and stay with you at weekends when you move house, as it's driving me mad here"!<P>My prayers are with you right now.<P>Plec.

Trying---I don't have anything to add, but just keep praying, and listen to His voice--You will know!<P>Hugs to you!<BR>Prayers, Krystal

Hi Trying, May the Lord give you His peace in these difficult times. I understand what you are going thru. I am also very depressed. Im crying a lot again. Im having a hard time trusting God lately. I dont understand why He allows so much intense pain for so many years. I cant get a grip on what im suppose to do. My W can never give me a straight answer on anything. Its like nobodys home. I found out she has keeped contact with OM and i have cut off contact with her for a while. He is in Prison, but that doesnt make me feel anybetter although it should. <BR>I will keep you in my prayers. Its really all is in Gods hands, and its going to feel so good to eventually be home with Him in heaven. It must be close. I see nothing but increased wickedness in this world like ive never seen before. <BR>Mark