I was forced to file for divorce yesterday from a man who has only been my husband for 8 months. He was a Pastor for 15 years and got divorced 2 years ago. He and his ex-wife had been married 30 years but had a bad marriage for 15. We married 8 months ago and our relationship was wonderful until he started drinking and going back to his ex-wife 2 weeks after we were married. He has left 18 times. He goes back to her and stays only for a few days so he can drink and then he comes back to me claiming that he's right with God. I love this man and I've taken him back every time. He knows he can't drink in my home so he goes to her. He's an alcoholic and I just can't take it anymore. I've felt like God wanted me to hang on but it's to hard anymore. 18 times is 18 to many. Please pray for God to perform a miracle in my situation or my divorce will go through in about 30 days. Thank you,

I've been there with an alcoholic ex-husband who tried to have both me and his secretary/girlfriend while we were separated. The best thing (and most empowering)I did for me was to put an end to it. I'll pray for your peace in what is such a difficult decision. When I went through my last breakup (5 yrs living together) I held onto one thing when all else was chaos ... Jeremiah 29:11. Sometimes I repeated it over and over and over. May God bless you in this time.

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by donna0419:
<strong>I was forced to file for divorce yesterday from a man who has only been my husband for 8 months. He and his ex-wife had been married 30 years but had a bad marriage for 15. ,</strong><hr></blockquote>
Donna,
I'm having a hard time with some of this, so I hope you will not be offended by what I am going to say.... YOUR H was M to his ex for 30 yrs....he's been M to YOU for 8 months? And you don't think he will EVER have occasion to see/talk with her? Do they have children together? If they do, there is a bond there that will always be there. That is just the nature of bringing children into the world together.<p>I suspect you are showing some jealousy toward his ex. I understand the drinking part. I would be worried about that,too. BUT (and it's a big but) - your statement that theirs was a "bad M for 15 yrs" worries me. YOU have NO WAY of knowing how "bad" it was, unless you lived w/them 24/7. Could he have misled you on some things? Could he have possibly told you that just to make himself believe it and now be questioning himself?<p>I am making a LOT of assumptions, here, so if I'm waaay off base, please forgive me. I'm ASSUMING you were not his OW. I'm ASSUMING you did not pressure him to D. his wife of 30 yrs. I'm ASSUMING you did not know he had a "drinking problem" to deal with/or had dealt with?<p>Please do not misunderstand my intentions. I feel for you, I really do. I'm just trying to understand HOW you can M a man with an ex W of 30 yrs. AND a "history" of drinking (and whatever else led to his NOT being a pastor anymore), and NOT THINK any of this would impact on your M.<p>Please consider MC for both of you.<p>God Bless,