Hi, everyone -- I found this website today and everything just 'clicked' and made sense! My husband and I have been married for 5 years (known each other for 6) and we are on the brink of divorce due to my recent insistence on getting something back (I've been giving all this time without much reciprocation, I feel and all of the sudden I've become quite vocal, angry and abusive about getting something back). <p> He has totally withdrawn and I keep fighting to bring him back to a point where we at least have some HOPE of reconciliation. His withdrawl, consistently ignoring my sexual (yes I'm one of those women who NEED SEX! He apparently doesn't LOL) and emotional needs has created a great anger within me and this has caused him to be less than receptive to what I have to say or my needs. It's a vicious cycle.<p>We have two beautiful young children - ages 5 and 3 and we really do enjoy each other's company, have similar interests and I love him . I just wish he'd show that same desire and feeling for me...<p>Please pray that we work through this. We are going to couples counseling but I fear that the counselor is not committed to keeping us together (as I would like to be). It isn't that she wants us separated but she feels that divorce is a viable option...<p>all the best,
Teresa

If your counselor feels divorce is a viable option, i pray you never go back. What kind of counseling is that?
Your husband may be in a severe depression. Does he hate his job intensly but knows he has to go everyday to feed his family?
Many people blame problems with depression and mental illness(my W is manic depresant) on their marriage. Thats the first lie we buy. The second lie is, it will all go away when we end the marriage. The third, is the children are better off. (there are many more)
Your husband may need meds.
Im going to be blunt though. We cannot find any peace in this world apart from God. Without God in the center of your marriage and family, you dont have a chance againts the enemy of marriages(Satan).
Dear Lord, I pray you come into Ruisha's home and bring your peace and healing that only you can bring. Take her H and her minds captive in Christ Jesus, and deliver them from evil. May they learn to trust in you Jesus.
In Jesus name, Amen
Mark

I don't believe in divorce myself, that is why I am here. I will pray for you every morning. Please look over the web site and get educated...then if you can try to find what Dr. Harley calls a Marriage Coach...like he says, a marriage coach makes you do what you don't want to. In my opinion a marriage counselor just shows you how to be nice while you divorce. Pray for all of these families and couples.

I agree with what one person says about often blaming mental illness on the marriage. That couldn't be further from the truth. I know, from first-hand experience, that mental illness can cause problems in a relationship. I have a mental illness, so this, at times, causes a struggle inside myself. I pray that this gets better. I also pray that your husband will realize his need to work with you. <p>It's interesting that you were asked if your husband is depressed. I can say that I am not interested in sex myself, especially when I am really depressed. I am working on getting back into therapy and not blaming my husband for my unhappiness. What a burden to give to someone we love--expect them to make us happy. I know because I have done it. It is totally unfair and selfish (I'm referring to myself here.) Do you think your husband is relying on you to make him happy?<p>I will pray that he works on recognizing the source of his unhappiness. Maybe then the two of you can work together. I hope so.