Hi my friends, I am in need of prayer this weekend. My tenth anniversary is tomorrow, and alot of emotions are welling up today. The Lord has arranged a concert each day starting tomorrow, for the whole weekend, He is good, so I will be busy. But today is not an easy one. I have spent time alone with the Lord this morning, and have prayed for my WH. I have shed tears and written a letter to my WH. I probably won't send it, just needed to let my feelings out. Please pray for my WH, his name is Bruce. That his heart will be turned toward Christ, that he will hear God's voice, that he will remember God's gift of each other and how awesome we were together before the A. Please also pray that I will be ok singing these next three days. I'm usually ok, but feeling like this today has me wondering. God Bless you all for being there in all circumstances!
Monika

Monika,

I will be praying for you and Bruce and also that the concerts go well. Keep your eyes on Christ, OK?

Blessings,
knight

Thanks Knight, It is amazing how fast one can fall into a downer, when you allow yourself to go there! Yesterday the prayers were felt. I had my cry on Thursday and even fewer tears on Friday, but ended up having a great day, a good concert, and am preparing for the next one now.
Thankyou for your prayers, it is so cool how the Lord is right there for us, right now... isn't it?
I had written a letter to Bruce, but was hoping the Lord would let me know whether or not to send it, and didn't seem to get a reply all day, then on my way to practice the other night, I just asked Him again "Lord what should I do?" and within seconds on the radio, was Elizabeth Elliot saying to singles about finding a mate, "Wait on the Lord, Wait because He knows what is best" Well I had just received my answer, so I will continue to wait.....
God Bless you for your caring heart...
Love in Christ, Monika

Monika, You are in my prayers. Your an inspiration to me. Ive only stood 4 years now. We are always going to have those days. Im having one of those months. It is very difficult to wait on God for so long. Try not to focus too much on WH. That can get depressing. This is Gods plan and although I argue with God at times about how long He makes us wait, its still His perfect plan, even though I personally cant see the perfection in it. God will Bless and honor you for your trust in Him.
Mark

Thanks Mark, Thankyou for your prayers, I truly appreciate them! I try not to focus on WH, but some days.... I just have to remember what Knight said, focus on "Jesus" . I actually had a pretty good weekend. I was singing all weekend, the Lord kept me busy! I gave my testimony and sang at a church on Sunday morning, and of course the main part of my testimony is my "stand". Well after the service a woman approached me and said that she thinks she had met my H. He used to be a salesman for a frozen meat co., and he was at her house years ago, and the reason she remembered, is because he wouldn't stop talking about me! Well she then said, "he sure loved you, and I just thought you needed to know that"
Well the tears gushed, and I was so grateful to hear that, cause you know how easy it is to forget the "good times" when your hurt. I feel like God gave me that awesome memory and more that day, and I am so grateful! I felt God's presence with me so strong at the concert, and know that there are so many more out there in the same situation, in fact quite a few people seem to come out of the woodwork and share there pain with me after my testimony. I am so glad that I can be there for others as well. Praise the Lord!
My prayers are with you also! I hope you have a great day and God Bless you!
Monika

<small>[ July 01, 2002, 10:54 AM: Message edited by: Stillwaiting ]</small>

Isn't it awesome how God gives us a little something to pick us up when we are down. Today I was feeling kind of bummed and I asked the lord to give me something positive to remind me to stand for my marriage. It wasn't 10 minutes later my wife called to ask me a question about our house. Just hearing her voice pumped me up for the rest of the day. She couldn't have called at a better moment. God will answer our prayers. It is just hard to wait on him sometimes.

I am glad your weekend ended up good. You and all the others that are standing for your marriages are such an inspiration to me. I will stand for my marriage till death do us part.

Lets keep the faith and keep praying for one another on a daily basis.

PRAYER WORKS!!!!!!!!!

Love in Christ

cajunky

Monika,
I'm so happy to hear that God is working in your life, and that you are allowing Him to. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Today I got frustrated with w in hospital and her not calling. When I got home her Dr explained the sit and 5 min later she called too and told me she was worrried about me. She said "I just got you back, I don't want to lose you now" I was doin a happy dance, <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

God is in control, when we look to the author and perfector of our faith we begin to get his viewpoint, which is so much better than ours. He is working all things to the good. You are an inspiration to many, me included.

Blessings to you,
knight

Thanks to all of you, I am blessed to know that I can help others, just to encourage them, it is all worth it.
The happy dance, I love it! We should all be doing that one! He sure knows how to pick us up when we need it, as long as we don't allow ourselves to go down too far... that only gives the devil a foothold!
I am also blessed by you all and this site, and am so thrilled to know there are so many others that will not give up on their marriages.
I just wish we all lived in the same area so we could have a meeting once in a while!
I feel the Lord is going to use me and my H when He has restored our marriage, to do some kind of marriage ministry. I felt that shortly after Bruce left, and I am feeling that again. Wow won't that be awesome?
I actually just emailed to Rejoice ministries, and plan to send them a song that I recorded, my friend wrote for me, it is called "I Will Wait", I received a reply that they are looking forward to it. Maybe I'll be able to sing it at their conference someday... I've posted the words under Poems, hope it encourages you!
Thankyou again, and God Bless you all and your families. I am glad I have some prayer warriiors on my wave length! Have a great day!
Monika

<small>[ July 02, 2002, 11:54 AM: Message edited by: Stillwaiting ]</small>

Still....I think God is going to use us all when he restores our marriages. I have had thoughts like you have. I have thought a lot that God is going to use my wife and I to encourage other couples that are having marriage difficulties. It is awesome how God works in our lives through this as long as we are obedient to him and continue to seek him. I just pray that I can show my wife soon how god has worked through me.

Love in Christ

cajunky

Awesome to hear you feel that way too!
We are his disciples after all!
I too hope it will be soon that the WS's return to join the disipleship team! God Bless!
Monika

Dear SW:
I too am encouraged by your testimony and the great stand for your marriage. They should give out metals for courageous people like you who are so patient to trust God but for sure your reward will be in heaven. God will honor those who suffer. It will be 2 years soon that I am waiting. My H left 3 days after our 10th anniversary so that was a painful memory for me as I knew for a month he was leaving.

That is beautiful that God has given you a gift to sing. I might only be a greeter in my church but we are all in the body of Christ with special gifts to share.

I am just curious why your H hasnt filed for divorce after all this time? Are you in complete Plan B or is there still some contact?

Sometimes I think, "when am I going to get over this?" but I see you and others who can still feel the pain and loss even after years from separation. Through this experience I have become much more compassionate for others and I have reached a much more intimate relationship with Christ so there is always goodness that comes out of this.

God bless you and I pray for your strength and courage to be committed to stand for your marriage.
Kim..

Hi Kim, thankyou for your kind words.
Why hasn't he filed? Well I think it's because he doesn't want to remarry and it is a good excuse for him. He asked me for a divorce after he moved out, I hadn't seen him since Nov. and the following FEb. I met him for a coffee, really felt the Lord with me, and told him all the promises God gave me about us. He said we should get a divorce, and I said "no way, you've made all the decisions up to now, leave that decision up to me. I don't want a divorce, and if God makes it clear to get one, I will certainly let you know." And basically that is where it has stood since. I've only actually seen him three times since he left. It had been 4 years from the last time, and God made it very clear for me to go and see him, he lives in another province. As I dropped in on him at work, for coffee, (should have seen his face!) I was blown away at the love that God has given me for this man who hurt me so deeply. I was overwhelmed. I felt that he was happy to see me, but he dare not admit that, because then he would have to admit that he had done wrong.
He is living with a woman that he was friends with since high school, they re-met while he was in his "leaving" stage. I believe the only reason he is still with her, is that she is a friend of the family, and his mom lives real close to them. Mom seems to be a big influence.
If he were to do the same thing to her he would have to admit to his family that it was his fault for messing around. He would lose face so to speak...
Although we really have no contact, the Lord puts him on my heart at times to pray for, and boy is that usually strong! I know I still feel him, whether or not he does me, I don't know, but we became one, and it is hard not to feel the other half, when something is going on in their lives.
I truly believe that the Lord is working on his heart as we speak. And I thank him so much for all He is doing and has done.
I'm glad to hear that you won't give up either, do hang in there, it will be so worth it in the end! Like you said, in heaven we will get our rewards, but i believe He will reward us here as well.
Have you got children? I do not, but I teach about 60 of them a year singing, all the Lords' doing! He has kept me so busy these past 7 years, that the time has just flown by! I am very grateful for that as well!
I pray that He will restore all of our marriages, and soon! God Bless you and feel free to write to me anytime if you need some encouragement, you can email me at; monikawithak@hotmail.com
Thanks again for your encouragement!
Love in Christ, Monika