StillLuvHer, Don't give up! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> One day at a time. Keep loving her faithfully. The Bible says that we are to deny ourselves. You are doing that now by denying your desires to be with her physically. To me, that is a truer love than a love that is "easy". Not sure if that makes sense... but remember 1 Cor. 13.... love is patient... love bears all things... love perseveres... love never fails!!

Hopeful, I'm sorry to not have much to say right now, but I will continue to pray for you. May God be near you and give you wisdom and strength.

Nothing good happening here. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

My H went to visit a cousin today. Not sure th reason of his visit but he started talking to her H (who is a church pastor). He starting asking about coming back to church and stuff. He just wasn't sure how people would react to that. When asked why, he said 'cause he would not be alone. (w/OW) Why does he want to take OW to church??? Is he trying to witness to her now? After having an affair with her and still talking junk about me? and treating me the way he has? Is this a normal person speaking? NOT! What is wrong with this man? The devil has such a good grip on him right now.

I've been reading a book called "The Love Every Woman Needs...Intimacy with Jesus" and it's GREAT! I read some when I got hom from work and was feeling so much peace. BUT now this!!! Is the devil working here to bring me down as well?? Most likely. He also said that he is going to look into a divorce this friday. Supposively he wants to do things right now and divorce me and then marry OW. <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" /> BUT, that's not all he said. He said that since I always made more money than he did, he was so used to that life that now that he's not with me, he's struggled. SO, he wants to make me have to support him after the divorce!! Can you believe that? When laughed at his face, he said that he's already spoken to several different people about this and this is a FACT and it CAN be done. WHAT????? Is he kidding?? Then he said that he doesn't want to go before a judge for all this. He just wants to settle this our selves and sign the papers and be off our own ways. So he can live happily ever after with OW. I feel so much for him, 'cause I see how lost he truly is. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE pray for me and my H. I've made a promise to God and if moving on with life WITHOUT my H is in His plan, than he will show me in the way I have asked him to show me. I was in tears earlier, but for some odd reason, deep down in my heart....I feel fine now. I feel like he is just talking to talk, and does not really mean what he has said. He's being a coward. Why does he talk to everyone else about our problems and our relationship, BUT me? I don't understand.

I just want to ask you all for you prayers. PLEASE help me be strong and keep my faith in God. The ONLY being in this world that will NEVER abandon me. Thank you for reading.

H98

Just a quick update.

Nothing major has happened. Life is still the same. I've been working on my relationship with God and it's truly been wonderful. He's given me peace. I pray for my H and our marriage EVERY day and I know that God is working. I don't see it, but I have faith and trust in him. I read some testimonies from Rejoice Ministries about WS's wanting to come back to their marriages and it just brought tears to my eyes. All day yesterday I had this peace in my heart. I felt like I already knew that my H wanted to come back. I even remember thanking God for bringing my H back. (which hasn't happened) It was weird but I liked it.

Today is the anniv of my D-day. 8 months. I don't even feel sad about it anymore. I've forgiven my H just like I know God has forgiven me for what I've done in my past. It's awesome but I do feel anxious at time and wonder WHEN my H will be back for good. I know recovery is hard work as well but I pray that God helps me prepare for when that begins. Two weeks ago I was offered a job in which I would work from home. I've wanted to get a job like that for the past two years but couldn't find one. The reason was because I wanted to get pregnant. Now I have the job opportunity but not my H. I was hurt at first and thought "why do I want the job now, forget it". But then I remembered that I had asked God to help me prepare for when my H comes back home. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> So, I'm going to try it out.

This past weekend, I went over to visit BIL, his wife and new baby. I had a wonderful time there. BIL and I talked (for the first time) about my H. He told me that he doesn't understand why H has done this. He thinks he has psychological problems. Then he told me that no matter what happened between us (H and I), I would always be a part of his family. He said he loved me for the sister that I have been for the past 5 years and always will be his children's aunt. I was so touched, that I wanted to cry but didn't. BIL still refuses to accept my H for what he's done, but he's made himself pretty clear to H as to why he won't accept him.

I need as many prayers as I can get. Please remember to pray for me and my marriage. I really appreciate it. I know that prayer is very POWERFUL and I have faith that God will bring my Prodigal H back home. I just need to be prepared for that and learn to accept God's will for my life. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Thank You all!

H98

Please keep me in your prayers.

As I said in a separate post, my H served me divorce papers on 10/21. My 30 calendar days are going to be up this next Thursday. I've made a decision on wether to file a response or not. I've prayed to God about it and I think this is the correct decision. In any case that I might have mis-understood Him in any way, I pray that he will correct my decision and show me what is right. Please pray for me. I haven't spoken to my h but I know that I need to say some things to him. Please pray that God shows me the correct time for me to do that. Thank you! God bless you all!!

H98

Hello Hopeful,
I read some of your posts and my heart and prayers go out to you. I know the pain well and I am at this time having all the same problems. I do not see my WH and not for 5 months. I think you should answer! If you do not then it says you agree to this divorce. Contest it or answer it with " I do not agree with a divorce now or ever". I have contested mine now for 18 months and have a date for court on Dec. 19. I am in NY and will still go into the courts and not sign or agree to anything. I have been told that it is only a piece of paper, but to me it is bigger than life itself. If the courts can do this without me then they will be against God's Law which will be stated by me. I do not fear court, only God. God Bless you in your fight.

Dearest Hopeful98,

I am praying for you also, i feel you'r pain. i know that's it was so very hurt to lose the husband that you love, i was in your situation before. but alway's have faith and hope in you'r heart. alway's remember that as long that you have love. love will alway's come back to you.

it's me
ola morena from philippines

Thanks for your prayers LoveNcare & Ola Morena.

I am asking that you remember me in your prayers again today. I am thinking of calling my H tonight. (which I haven't spoken to for almost 4 mths) I feel I need to let him know (one last time) that I do not want this divorce, that I love him still but that I will not stand in his way or fight him. He is free to do what he wants but that I will always be praying for him. I am very nervous just thinking about it. I don't even know how I'd say good-bye to him. I know God will guide me so I ask that you please pray for me. Thank You!

H98

I've also posted this on the D/D board but wanted to post here as well.

I have made a big decision about my marriage tonight and have left it completely in God's hands. I know that some of you may disagree with me but I truly feel this is what God wants me to do. This thursday is the last day for me to file a response to the divorce papers my H served me on 10/31. I have decided not to file. I've prayed about it and God has asked me to trust him completely.

"Declare me innocent, O Lord
because I do what is right
and trust you completely"
Psalms 26:1

I just got off the phone with my H a few minutes ago. I called him. I prayed very much about it and asked God to stop me if this was the wrong decision. Either way, I know that God is going to lead me the rest of the way and out of this desert and into the promised land. I told him that I still loved him, I still pray for him, that I do not want this divorce still but that I was not going to stand in his way. I told him that I trusted him, and that I know from his past that he will be fair. I told him I've loved him many years already and that love hasn't changed. I told him that if this was what he needed to find true happiness in his life (which I know he won't find unless he comes back to God) then I was not going to fight him. I was not going to file a response. I told him not to forget that I love him, that God loves him and that neither one of us has given up on him.

Nothing else I can do for my marriage but keep PRAYING. This is so hard and has made me cry alot again but I know that God is with me and I WILL be ok. I am trusting him COMPLETELY and have dedicated my life to Him and Him alone. The enemy will not have ANY part of my life and I tell him that out loud many times (in case he's hard of hearing). PLEASE keep me in your prayers as I am still human and hurt very much after all these months. Pray for my h's heart to be softened. I know that God is a God of Second Chances but I pray that my h will take that chance given to him. He's given me another chance and I'm taking it and never letting go of Him again. God is also a God of miracles and I know that NOTHING is impossible for him. Pray that I face the right direction in life and do as God wants me to do. Thank you all!

God Bless You!!

Keep praying and trusting in the Lord. I know what you are going through. My husband and I have been separated almost 4 years. I blamed him for everything and thought I had done nothing wrong. The Lord showed me how I had sinned as much as he had. Keep your faith in God because He is the only one that can fix it for you. He has your situation under control. Remember God hates divorce. My husband wouldn't come around me for a long time. He does now because he has seen a big change in me. I could have never changed without Gods help. I have gone through every thing you are going through and more. Sometimes I just felt like giving up but in my heart I knew that God didn't want that, so I kept trusting in Him. I've suffered through depression, ow, and oc. It hasn't been easy but I know now the Lord has been with me all along, I only wish I had of known it from the beginning. Keep your faith and trust only in Him. He is right there by your side.

Hopeful -

I feel your pain. I too made that same decision last night. H said he was going to file for D this week. I prayed and prayed but my sitch kept getting worse by the day.

Last night I called H cell phone (actually left a message) and told him that I will always love and care about him but that I will not stand in his way. I know the hurt and pain your going through right now, especially with the holidays coming up. Even though we are at peace with our decisions we are going to go through a mourning period. It is like a death. I know when I hung up that phone last night I just sat down and cried. After months of fighting for my M it was finally time to let go and leave it in the hands of God.

I pray everynight that God will show my H the way back to me and him. I will continue to pray everyday and keep you in my prayers.

It's been exactly one year that I started posting here. I've learned so much in that year and know that God still has so much more to teach me. I want to thank all of you that have helped me and encouraged me along the way. Many are no longer posting here but a few might still be lurking. Thanks!

I know I've still got a long way ahead of me but I have faith in God and KNOW that he will restore my M. In HIS perfect timing.

Thank you Father for everything you have done for me. Thank you Lord for sending your Son to this earth to die for MY sins. Thank you for carrying me in the midst of my storms. Thank you for those one set of footprints in the sand. I ask that you comfort each and every person on this board, the way you have comforted me. Thank you for bringing us all together to pray for each other. This is a long journey. We may stumble and fall, but know that You are Always there to help us up. Thank you Father! Amen!

Hopeful,

I'm glad you bumped up this thread. It has encouraged me .

Where are things at with your husband now?

Shul

Hi Shul,

Glad to hear this has encouraged you. Don't give up! God IS working.

I really don't know where things are with my H and I. We don't have any type of communication. Our D should have been final a few weeks ago, but I still haven't heard anything about it. H did say a couple months ago that he didn't care about it anymore. PTL! I've left it all in God's hands.

A few days ago I prayed and asked God to help me have some type of communication with my H. I miss him so much and I want to hear from him. Talk to him. But I did ask God to allow it, only if it was His will. That same night, I had an interesting dream. My H was in it. We were talking (just like I wanted to), BUT he was telling me things that would make my mind wander and hurt me. Things the devil was using to distract me. I was confused for a day about that dream. Until a day later. I finally realized God was telling me that having communication with my H right now was not a good idea. I would just hurt more by the things he would say to me (not directly, but the conclusions I would come up with). So, I know this is God's will and I am content with it. God knows BEST and I trust Him! I KNOW he is working in my H's life, even though I don't see anything happening. There is NO WAY the enemy will destroy this marriage. I WILL NOT ALLOW IT!!!!!

Hope you are feeling better Shul. Keep trusting and believing. God keeps His promises. Take Care and have a great weekend!

H98

<small>[ June 05, 2004, 01:23 AM: Message edited by: hopeful98 ]</small>

Hopeful,

You sound so much like me when my H was gone. Nothing would stop my faith that God would restore my M! I believed it everyday & when I would start to doubt, I would get in my prayer closet, read some scripture, and believe it again! Keep holding onto that faith. God will fulfill His promises to you in His timing. Although we may not know what He has in store for us, we can always believe & have faith that God wants the best for us & He loves us unconditionally!

My prayers are with you,
Yvette

Thank you both so much for your words.

I ahve been struggling these past few days, something fierce.

I have been praying all day.

Just 5 minutes ago my husband messsageed me that he will come tonight or tomorrowmorning, he said 'I will come , I must come...'

I Pray that when he sees me and his daughter he will fall in love. That he will forget the ow and have such a restful time and feel so loved here, that he will want to come back often as he can.

And that God will reach him by my loving ways.