I have been married to my husband for almost 20 months. We had only known each other seven months and then got married.

But recently after 15 months of marriage my husband said he did love me but had not wanted to get married to me. This revelation as you can imagine, has devastated me.

Although my husband and I have spoken openly and honestly about this. It is our second marriage. My ex-husband had abused alcohol and his wife had died from cancer.

My husband and his wife had been married for 13 years and were very much in love. He was an incredibly good husband to her and to their 4 children.

He has been a good husband to me up to now and has always been very affectionate with me and always told me he loves me.

But I feel so broken that he said he did not want to marry me.

I am a reborn christian and I do not want to consider divorce ever again but feel that I have been mislead although last night he told me he loves me and he wants our marriage to succeed. And many times he does make me feel totally loved and accepted by him. He is a very good man and has been brought up to be a responsible, kind and caring person. All of his family are saved except him. He does not like to talk about been saved.

I ask for your prayers as I am lost in knowing this revelation and just do not seem to cope at the moment. I believe in marriage but feel that I am wrong staying married to him if perhaps he could have another chance at happiness.

I have told him I would be prepared to leave if this is what he wants. And that I would always remain friends with him and we could help each other through this but he tells me not to be silly and that he really does love me and wants our marriage. It is though that I don't trust him anymore and even doubt his love and committment to our marriage now.

But mostly I feel ashamed before the Lord, who I love with every part of me, that I would consider giving up and leaving.

Thank you
Jem24

JEM,
My prayers are with you and your husband and your marriage. It is hard to hear that you are not loved and the marriage was not wanted. My H laid that one on me too. I thought that i was going to loose my mind and my heart.
I never stopped praying, I really wanted the marriage and my H. I believe whole heartedly in the vows I said the day we were married. I believe whole heartedly in I Corinthians 13:4-8. I could not let it go. We are improving daily now.
My prayers are for strength, wisdom and patience.
What ever you and your H decide together WILL be for the better.
lol
2nd

<small>[ July 09, 2003, 07:15 AM: Message edited by: 2ndfiddle ]</small>

Hi Jem24,

You said:
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> I have been married to my husband for almost 20 months. We had only known each other seven months and then got married.
But recently after 15 months of marriage my husband said he did love me but had not wanted to get married to me. This revelation as you can imagine, has devastated me.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I am confused. Are you saying that he told you recently that at the time of your wedding he had not wanted to marry you?

That must be a difficult for you I'm sure. In my opinion, from here forward is the most important thing for you. I will pray that your marriage will last and work, regardless of what your husband has said that has hurt you.

Gregg