I am still in a standstill in my marriage. My H still hasn't agreed to work on marriage and I am trying to be his friend. I have given my marriage to God and have asked him to heal it. I still have the feeling he (Mike) is waiting this out for some reason.(?)
He tries to get along with me, he is a good person, and I am sure he is going through a mid-life crisis. He has admitted to things not being right in his head, and he has alot of the signs. I am glad he has admitted something IS wrong. But he makes these silly jokes, that's what they are!In the joking tone of voice. For example, he heard something at work and replied to me "If you ever mention this to anyone, I'll leave you, I mean I'm still going to leave you, just sooner..." This is with a smile on his face. Take it, this was a time where we were being friends and getting along together last week.
But what got me down, then right up again because I took it as a little inspiration from God, is that tonight he called me from work and when he said he had to go, he said "I love you". I said "What did you say?". He hung up but called right back and said he accidently said that. He hasn't said I love you since Oct. He still tells his kids that, but can you accidently say it? I haven't because I am not wanting to push him. I cried afterwards, but then I stopped and told myself that this could be a blessing from God, a lilltle sign, <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> so I praised him for it.
I needed that so bad, even though "it was by accident...." But the hurt I haven't been feeling, just rose up again. Please pray that I will resume the strenghth I had and walk again in faith.
I know it wasn't an accident, is it wrong for me to think this? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" />
