I was reading here - after an absence of what, a year or so? - and I read what Shul (i think) said about giving up as being a lack of trust of GOD and this is exactly what I think.

I had the "reality check" talk with H today - I do this every few months. It's kind of like picking a scab, but I have to know. So again he says he is only staying for the children.

(But one thing new - he said he IS glad he married me, he just thinks it is too bad that we grew apart, and he just loves OW too much to give her up.)

I can't bring myself to do plan b - I just can't get any peace about that - although I would do it if he moved out or if we didn't have 3 children.

And it's not a very good plan a any more. I got tired. At first, I was so broken before GOD and I had all kinds of love flowing through me and plan a was automatic. Then I got mad at GOD - you know - I am doing what you say GOD, and you haven't fixed my marriage, so BLEAH. (and I stopped praying and reading the word, and went back to most of my old bad habits.) But I'm getting myself back in line with God (or he is) and we'll just see what happens next. I have got to give up my "I know what would be best, God, so just do that." and wait for God to do his best.

Anyway, since I don't have people here to be open with, it would help to have people praying for me!

bgentle,

May God give you courage and faith to go through one more day.

(We are supposed to take only one day at a time, and boy, now I know why!)

Father, thank you for your love for bgentle. Thank you for the work you are doing in her, and that she is trusting in you, and your plan. I know you have a strategy for her situation. Please show her a ray of hope Lord God.

I pray for her husband that you will help him to see the beautiful woman that she is, that he will suddenly realise what a good gift you have given him, in her.
I ask that tomorrow he will look at her, and see her as desirable, and loving, and kind. I ask that you will make him forget the ow, or any feelings he had. Let him only have eyes for his wife.

Father, let bgentle not have to try to plan A. Let her have such a love for her husband that it will come natural to her, to be gentle and loving. A quiet spirit, Lord.

If there is any unforgiveness or bitterness, show her so that she can deal with it quickly and it will not hinder the work you are doing.

I ask this in Jesus name, and thank you Father.

WOW

That was fast, and just what I needed.

But now I need to sleep.

Thanks!

Bgentle,

It is so hard to trust God isn't it? It's so hard to put ourselves out there fully & let Him handle EVERYTHING! I struggle with it all the time. I remember having those moments when I would ask God too, Why isn't it finished already God? Have you forgotten about me? But then I come to my senses & realize that it is in His timing, not mine so I pray continually for peace while I wait for Him to show His miracles.

I will be praying for you.

Yvette

bgentle,

I was wondering if you belong to a restoration ministry? I joined one four years ago after my husband left and said he would never come back.He came home eight months ago.

I ask this because you say that you pick the scab every few months and ask .I kept making this same mistake. I finally got tired of hitting my head against the wall.The restoration ministry taught me through God's word not to " pick the scab" by asking him anymore.

It took me time to learn God's principles but when I did things started changing. God spoke to me through this site www.restorem.org


gentle

<small>[ June 11, 2004, 11:55 PM: Message edited by: gentle ]</small>

bgentle,

I also belong to this ministry and I can't tell you how much they kept me focused on doing what God wanted me to do and kept my eyes focused on God's blessings. I highly recommend you check it out.

God's blessings,
Y

<small>[ June 12, 2004, 10:43 AM: Message edited by: StandingTogether ]</small>

I did buy books from some restore site, and it said #1 Obey your H.

Then I was going to join, but there was no way to do it anonymously. WH asked me not to tell people about his A (I know, contrary to MB principles.) I told him I couldn't promise that but that I would tell him if I told anyone. (I have told 3 people.) I did tell him about getting on MB and he is ok with it because of the anonymity. But this other site, I don't remember which one, asked a LOT of questions before you could join.

Bgentle,

The ministry ask question so they will know how to ministry to you and to make sure members are someone really wanting a restored marriage.

They never give out your name or information. If you get a prayer partner they only give them your first name and your husband's first name and email address. You have to tell them anything else. You don't have to get a prayer partner. The restore site is very firm about not shameing your spouse. This is mentioned all through their books.

God's principles lined out in their books , work.
Using these principles is what turned my husband's heart back to me and our marriage. I know this is what you want, so I just thought I would mention the site. I do pray his heart is turned back to you.

gentle

<small>[ June 13, 2004, 01:52 AM: Message edited by: gentle ]</small>