b4a,
Thanks so much for your testimony! I appreciate hearing how others hear from God.
Believe me when I tell you my faith wasn't always so "unswerving." It took A LOT for God to "get through to me" and convince me that He is totally in control, and I could trust that. At first, I began to see His Control of my everyday life.
When my H first left, we had just moved in to our "dream home" after spending 5 months renovating it. It wasn't totally done, but done enough to move into...........hadn't unpacked a single box yet!!
We were up to our eyeballs in CC debt. He left me with all the debt, 6 dogs and 1 cat (to clean up after and feed daily)
It was a mess. I WAS A MESS!!! I probably spent the first month in bed. Totally depressed and unable to move, breathe or think. Somehow, I managed to figure out that what I needed most was to return to God. I went to a few churches, seeking answers from Him, solace and comfort.
In my "alone time" (of which there was a LOT - I am a teacher, and it was summer vacation), I unpacked all the boxes, tried to put my house in order, decide what to throw, what to keep. Interestingly, since I was probably what would be described as "clinically depressed" - I managed to throw away a lot of stuff I wouldn't have thrown away if I was thinking straight. Not bad stuff, just that I'm a pack-rat, and I NEVER throw anything away!! In the frame of mind I was in, I DIDN"T CARE!!! That was really a good thing, in retrospect.
When I got tired of unpacking, I hunted on-line for "Divorce Recovery" stuff. Finally, through several other sources for "divorce" - many of which push for everyone to DIVORCE AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE IN ORDER TO FIND SOMEONE ELSE....I found THIS site. That opened my eyes.
Especially since this site "preaches" that it only takes ONE to save a M. I liked that! It wasn't really possible, since we weren't even
communicating. But I first I came to this section (Prayer Requests), and it became my favorite place to "hang out." I was here several hours a day........learning, reading, praying with and for others. Still going to this one particular church (although it really wasn't "doing it" for me).
Meanwhile, I discovered RejoiceMinistries and RestoreMinistries. BOTH of which spoke to me about what GOD COULD DO to restore my M. THEN SOMETHING REALLY COOL HAPPENED!!!
As I started to visualize that it WAS possible to have my H back, my M restored, I wrote to RejoiceMinistries, and on a particularly bad day,
I RECIEVED MUSTARD SEEDS IN THE MAIL from them!!! Think about it!!! When I needed a "boost," a sign, a Word from God about what I was starting to think might be possible, GOD SENT ME MUSTARD SEEDS TO HELP BOOST MY FAITH!!! Isn't that cool!?!? I carried those silly seeds around with me for a year until they smushed so fine, they were nothing but powder! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
Talking about falling on your face..........I did that too. It was through RestoreM's website that I began to realize that I was just as guilty as he was for the state our M was in. I truly SAW what I had done that was so wrong in our M, and
fell on my face before God asking for forgiveness for all my sinful, disobedient ways toward God and my H. That was also the beginning of a healing for me. I spent hours upon hours reading my Bible. I couldn't get enough of the Word! And through The Word, God continually revealed His Will to me. I don't know why I started reading in Psalms & Proverbs, but I did....then continued into Ezekiel, Isaiah, and into the lesser Prophets. Through those books in the Bible, God
continued to reveal to me that He was a God of Restoration, and
He was going to Restore our M!! Certain verses jumped out at me, all of which confirmed His plan to restore us. There was NOTHING to "show" this, but I had gotten to the place by then, when I began to BELIEVE GOD, and learn enough about His Nature to KNOW that HE CANNOT LIE, and if He said it, I just had to believe it, and
it would come to pass!The more I spoke that truth, the more my spirit was comforted, and the easier it was to believe it.
In another weird twist of circumstance (God's leading?), I met a woman who invited me to her church. It was closer to home, and I knew God wasn't really speaking to me the way I desired at the church I was at. SO, I visited her church. Instantly I KNEW God had led me there! God spoke through the pastor
the very first time I visited! He spoke about Elijah and Jezebel. He kept saying that she "scared" Elijah so much after the "mountain-top" experience he had had with the prophets of Baal........he RAN 180 MILES IN THE WRONG DIRECTION TO RUN AWAY FROM GOD, AND HIDE FROM A WOMAN. That got to me. After all, my H had "run." He mentioned the miles Elijah ran several times during the sermon, and it got my attention. Soooo, when I got home, I got into Mapquest, and punched in the addresses of where OW lived, and where I lived. Guess what?!?! SHE LIVED 180 MILES AWAY FROM ME!!!!!!!!!!!!
MY H HAD RUN 180 MILES AWAY!!! TO HIDE!! It blew me away. The first of many ways in which God spoke to me through this pastor. I KNOW God put me in this church, and I KNOW He speaks to me there.
OK, so to answer your ??? of how God "spoke" to me about restoring my M specifically (I kinda think I answered this, but let me specify). God can talk to us in many ways. But IF it's not from His Word (or even if it is), I have always "required" that it be confirmed. I hate to use the work "required" b/c I don't want to confuse anyone. It isn't that I REQUIRE God to do anything. More like: I want to be SURE........so I look for confirmation. I hope that's clear. Well, anyway, I usually look for confirmation by having God say it THREE TIMES. It can be three different scriptures, or other sources. In other words, I look for 3 sources to speak a Word to me. AT LEAST ONE
MUST be from His Word. Three different sources, and they all MUST say the same thing! Some of them came from something on TV, a tv preacher, or other show, something I read on here, or other help source, or other people, and of course, ONE MUST BE GOD'S WORD AND LINE UP WITH HIS WILL.
Well, I want to thank you for calling me "righteous" and faithful. BELIEVE ME, it didn't come easy! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> If anyone else is reading this, please believe me that this was a hard struggle. I cried, I fell on my face, and I DISBELIEVED many times. I DID! But He always brought me back, sat me up, spoke to me (again!), and gave me more faith to believe for the next step. And -
believe this - it only happens ONE STEP AT A TIME!!! Just take one little step of faith at a time........and as you stand on the little illumination of faith that you have, He will strengthen you and give you another step of higher faith!
Listen, THE JOURNEY ALONE WAS WORTH ALL THIS!!!
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">One thing I know though - I’m going to start living and believing the promise that he gave to me last summer. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">If you need Him to give you another promise for THIS summer, ASK HIM!!! Our God loves us, and wants to give us ALL OF HIMSELF, He wants to give us whatever we require to live powerful, faith-walking lives......
ASK HIM TO TAKE YOU TO ANOTHER LEVEL, GIVE YOU MORE FAITH, or reveal His working within the faith you DO have. HE LOVES US, AND WANTS TO GIVE US THE DELIGHTS OF OUR HEARTS!!
Just ask Him.
[ </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"><strong>All glory and honor to God <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">
<small>[ July 19, 2004, 08:08 AM: Message edited by: lupolady ]</small>
