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#348832 04/16/01 08:52 PM
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Hey,ClydeA..my girlfriend told me this crazy idea last night...she told me once she wore nothing but gift bows (ribbons) all over for her H. I asked didn't the bows hurt? She says they don't stick that well and her H said it was fun unwrapping such a nice present

Just hope to make you all smile today!

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Fresh Start


#348833 04/17/01 01:31 AM
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FreshStart:

Did her H enjoy the REAL present underneath after he had removed all the bows?

Clyde


#348834 04/18/01 12:08 AM
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I hope so!

How are things go, Clyde? I think about you and your W often.

things are good for me and H. I seem to have more rough days than good and yet the happy days are like euphoria.

I am working on same painful past issues so maybe that's the source of my misery and this total forgiving of self is a killer for me...sometimes I wonder if I'll ever make it thru in one piece!

Take care! Hey, this whomps but it is STILL cold in Canada...where is our spring that comes with Easter?

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Fresh Start


#348835 04/17/01 03:54 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by freshstart:


I think about you and your W often.



Thank you. We are doing quite well now Two weeks ago I told her of my discovery of the MB site and explained why I was spending long hours on the Internet. Maybe I did something stupid, but I told her I had posted our situation on the MB BB and what some of the responses were.

Six weeks before — well before MB — I had brought up the subject and she took it in stride. However, she did not take this one very well and clammed up, then fell into a week-long silent period.

I don't think the fact that the responses to the MB posts reinforced a lot of what I had said before went down too well, or, maybe, it was the fact thaht she was hearing it all over AGAIN.

She was annoyed; I wasn't.

Since posting, I have been able to understand a lot of the things she had not been telling me. SKM's responses to my posts have also helped a lot. I feel a lot better now, having seen every aspect of my situation being dealt with by so many others on tha Boards.

WE had a lovely Easter and I am much further along the road to recovery.

I am helping her with a very challenging project on whichshe is working and she is depending on me heavily for help.I am using thid as a means of putting some Love Units into the Bank. I think it will also hwelp me to push that matter further behind me.

All through this, she has insisted that she had done nothing wrong and he is "just a friend". Ihad always found it to be ridiculous, buut she thinks people are too judgemental.

She thinks it strange that one can't have a friendship like she did without others reading something sinister into it.

I kept telling her that it was fraught with danger, but she couldn't see it as the were "doing nothing wrong". After all, she says, "It was not THAT kind of friendship". SKM showed me that even though it might have been innocuous, it had serious potential for getting out of hand.

Anyway, it is really for me to heal as she doesn't think that SHE has a problem.

I still remember you in my prayers and ask that you remember us in yours. I am sill in need of proper employment as our financial position is still grim. Please pray all you can for me — and us.

Clyde


#348836 04/17/01 05:50 PM
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Clyde, you know I will keep praying. Perhaps we can pray for one another re work. WE just went to a job fair today and after 18 yrs of ministry, I don't even know what a resume should look like now!! Some possiblities.

Daughter is waiting to chat with a bunch of buds so I will go for now. SKM is very good to me. As a W myself, I resisted H's pleas not to befriend OM...thought I had it under control, knew what I was doing..obviously I did not...hope yours is not just a happy ending but a wonderful new beginning!!

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Fresh Start


#348837 03/12/02 07:02 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by freshstart:
Hey,ClydeA..my girlfriend told me this crazy idea last night...she told me once she wore nothing but gift bows (ribbons) all over for her H. I asked didn't the bows hurt? She says they don't stick that well and her H said it was fun unwrapping such a nice present <IMG SRC="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/smile.gif">

Just hope to make you all smile today!



I'd love to get that gift from my wife


#348838 03/12/02 07:10 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by ClydeA:


Thank you. We are doing quite well now Two weeks ago I told her of my discovery of the MB site and explained why I was spending long hours on the Internet. Maybe I did something stupid, but I told her I had posted our situation on the MB BB and what some of the responses were.

Six weeks before — well before MB — I had brought up the subject and she took it in stride. However, she did not take this one very well and clammed up, then fell into a week-long silent period.

I don't think the fact that the responses to the MB posts reinforced a lot of what I had said before went down too well, or, maybe, it was the fact thaht she was hearing it all over AGAIN.

She was annoyed; I wasn't.

Since posting, I have been able to understand a lot of the things she had not been telling me. SKM's responses to my posts have also helped a lot. I feel a lot better now, having seen every aspect of my situation being dealt with by so many others on tha Boards.

WE had a lovely Easter and I am much further along the road to recovery.

I am helping her with a very challenging project on whichshe is working and she is depending on me heavily for help.I am using thid as a means of putting some Love Units into the Bank. I think it will also hwelp me to push that matter further behind me.

All through this, she has insisted that she had done nothing wrong and he is "just a friend". Ihad always found it to be ridiculous, buut she thinks people are too judgemental.

She thinks it strange that one can't have a friendship like she did without others reading something sinister into it.

I kept telling her that it was fraught with danger, but she couldn't see it as the were "doing nothing wrong". After all, she says, "It was not THAT kind of friendship". SKM showed me that even though it might have been innocuous, it had serious potential for getting out of hand.

Anyway, it is really for me to heal as she doesn't think that SHE has a problem.

I still remember you in my prayers and ask that you remember us in yours. I am sill in need of proper employment as our financial position is still grim. Please pray all you can for me — and us.

Clyde


I understand this situation somewhat. I don't consider myself a wayward spouse with anyone other than my own fantasies and inner deamons. I did however have an "other woman" latch on to me a while back and had to "cut her loose." (meant prying her fingers off me emotionally with ultimately an "no contact" decision my wife and I mutually agreed upon).

If you don't mind since it sounds like we're all sort of in a same boat or similar situations perhaps I'll pray for all of us too.


#348839 03/12/02 07:14 PM
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Kasey1, you sure are visiting the archives!

This thread shows me how far I have come. And yet in the romantic experiences arena, I certainly could be more creative like my friend! A very good friend just reminded me how important it is to make time for our spouse and how much fun we miss out on in M by not taking a more playful funloving approach to our sex life.

Hope you get your present before Christmas!!


#348840 03/12/02 07:24 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by freshstart:
Kasey1, you sure are visiting the archives!

This thread shows me how far I have come. And yet in the romantic experiences arena, I certainly could be more creative like my friend! A very good friend just reminded me how important it is to make time for our spouse and how much fun we miss out on in M by not taking a more playful funloving approach to our sex life.

Hope you get your present before Christmas!!


I'm just following directions my wife says go read here and I'm here!

I think my wife WANTS to give me that present much sooner than Christmas.

I'm hoping I do as well receiving it as she does giving it. I really have no doubt she can please me whenever she wants.

Her coming out of her shell with respect to her feelings about herself is another story. On that matter christmas is fine if she's ready if not whenever is fine. I'll be here.

thanks for the reply way down here in the archives.

what I think so far from reading in this section is that anything she does would be fine so long as it comes from inside and she's wanting to try something.

I'm pretty open to adventure, maybe too open for her comfort.


#348841 03/12/02 07:34 PM
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Kasey1, take it from a woman who has survived childhood sexual abuse and other junk, once your wife begins to heal re her self esteem, the tables might just turn on you!!

The best compliment H EVER gave me was telling a friend (that part was embarrassing but his W was in a similar emotional place to where I had been) was that once a lady comes to terms with her abuse and gets well, the H just has too much woman to handle!! (Too bad I was such a moron that I didn't remember that when I fell into A but I was smart enough to get rid of OM and realize the only man I ever REALLY loved and love is H)

Your W is a smart lady to send you to this forum!]
Yes, I agree...respecting each other's boundaries and sometimes letting down your guard can lead to amazing SF!

I hope I can make H feel like he gets the best compliments ever from me!!


#348842 03/13/02 10:48 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by freshstart:
Kasey1, take it from a woman who has survived childhood sexual abuse and other junk, once your wife begins to heal re her self esteem, the tables might just turn on you!!

The best compliment H EVER gave me was telling a friend (that part was embarrassing but his W was in a similar emotional place to where I had been) was that once a lady comes to terms with her abuse and gets well, the H just has too much woman to handle!! (Too bad I was such a moron that I didn't remember that when I fell into A but I was smart enough to get rid of OM and realize the only man I ever REALLY loved and love is H)

Your W is a smart lady to send you to this forum!]
Yes, I agree...respecting each other's boundaries and sometimes letting down your guard can lead to amazing SF!

I hope I can make H feel like he gets the best compliments ever from me!!


I've known for some time (felt it in my bones) that the tables were turning on me. I see this both as a function of age and changes in my body and as a function of her healing process and what might be a desire on her part to make up lost ground...

God have mercy.


#348843 03/14/02 11:10 PM
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Kasey & Freshstart:

After eleven months and this post is revived. WOW!!!

I hope Kasey takes his W to the naturist resort (nudist colony) for a different romantic experience.

Clyde

P.S.: Just realizez that today is one year since I first came to MB and posted my story in the Emotional Needs forum titled, "Is She Having An Emotional Affair?"

Clyde

[ March 14, 2002: Message edited by: ClydeA ]


#348844 03/15/02 09:52 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by ClydeA:
[QB]Kasey & Freshstart:

After eleven months and this post is revived. WOW!!!

I hope Kasey takes his W to the naturist resort (nudist colony) for a different romantic experience.

QB]


rolling on the floor laughing lol!!!!!

ya know for some reason I don't think that would go over too well.



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