hi you need to move or redo your post over into the General Questions area or emotional one.
your husband sounds like he is controlling you and he does the crazy making thing to you.
mine was good at that..he always was right and if he was wrong he would tell me he WAS RIGHT and I can agree to disagree with him but he was right anyway,
he alway would interupt me when I talked if I didn't have the right time or something exact like it was a big deal...
he never could say he was sorry.
he would start arguments and then he would want to make up having sex..I use to love making love with him, but I finally came to a conclusion he needed to feed his anger..sounds weird but I guess that was a thing of control too.
well I am not sure what to tell you, except you need to take care of you and go to councelling alone to get help for you.
I imagine you already know..there is nothing wrong with him, it is all you..THATS WHAT THEY WANT US TO THINK..it is not true so don't believe it..
it does take two to make the marriage work and you are frustrating yourself doing it alone.
the present and trinkets are to appease you.
he placates you and tells you what you want to hear..(mine never did presents or trinkets)
nut was selfish somehow I BOUGHT him trinkets and presents to try to get him to love me..and make him happy, I did everything I could..
some men are incapable of love..the therapist I saw said I was right he used me to get his needs met...that broke my heart to hear it from a professional..it is one thing to think it and feel it..but to have someone agree with you then look at you and tell you, "YOU get half of everything in divorce." OH man I got so upset I started to bawl..I asked him will he change and he said your husband sat here joking about your pain and smirking. he was truthful it hurt..more.
and then the ride home with husband..I cried while driving I am suprised we didn't crash..
but it was true and I knew all the councelling in the world would not help..
also had been there before and they told me the same thing..
only difference was husband was sitting right there and did not flinch not say anything just sat there with a stupified satisfied look on his face as the pain washed over my face..
I had gotton advice from Dr. Harley to tell him to leave till he could learn to treat me right and respect me..that never happened so we went to councelling in a last ditch effort on my suggestion..thats what happened..he REALLY didn't care or was incapable the therapist told me he was NOT capable..I could not put up with the
impulsive behaviour he was also one big flirt with other women needing their attention..
while I watched..
so please get councelling if you continue to stay together cause if he is like mine your in for one miserable time with only a few times of happiness and they are far apart..
God bless you
Keep on keeping on.
oh and I don't have to work on it nor do I have to worry about him anymore with ow...because
he is deceased
HE had told me i loved him too much..that meant partly I put up with too much stuff. I still don't get it..and I always thought he did not getit..I do still love him even after all the pain he caused the last 5 years of our marriage trying to divorce me and pushing me away.
my one expression to him was always..do I look like I fell off a turnip truck yesterday? or do I look stupid>??
Keep on keeping on.