NSR,<P>I gotta tell you - you are REALLY impressive!!! Your W is a FOOL!!!! You are REALLY a good man and have gotten so wise and strong. I am really IMPRESSED with you and how well you are supporting so many people here!<P>Keep up the GREAT work!!!!!! <P>Roll Me Away<P>------------------<BR>"Life is made up, not of great sacrifices or duties, but of little things in which smiles and kindnesses and small obligations, given habitually, are what win and preserve the heart and secure comfort."<P>Sir Humphry Davy<BR>

NSR-<P>I needed to add my kudos to you too!!<P>You are IMPRESSIVE and I agree w/ RMA. Your wife is fool!!<P>I hope that fog lifts for her soon, before it's too late.<P>God Bless,<P>Cheryl

Thumbs up from me too. <P>Lori

Thank you...Roll Me Away, Cheryl and Lori...<P>I really wish I found Marriage Builders earlier... (joined 9/27/99)... so long after discovery(4/99)...divorce filing(6/99)...wife leaving(8/99).<P>I've come to believe you people here at forum are the <B><I>guardian angels</I></B> for the <I>maritally impaired</I> (sounds a bit weird... but... )<P>When there was no where to turn... I found all you guys/gals... and realized...<B>I am not alone</B>... none of us are!<P>There is <B>nowhere</B> else I have ever found a group that is so...<BR><B>supportive...<BR>unconditionally loving...<BR>non-judgmental...<BR>caring...<BR>gently correcting... when we stray...</B><P>I haven't seen it in any religious organization...<BR>I definitely haven't seen it in counseling...<BR>I haven't seen it... to this degree... with my family...<P>This is the place where <B>everyone</B> really practices...<BR><B>Love your neighbor as yourself...</B><BR>In some cases it's... Love your neighbor <B>more</B> than yourself!<P>I am so unbelievably <B>honored</B> to know you all... <P>You know my prayers are with <B>you</B>...<BR>and with <B>everyone</B> here!<P>Jim<BR>---------------------------------<BR>Where two or more are gathered...

NSR -- I have to agree with the parise you have received from the others.<P>The welcome you are giving to new members is absolutely fantastic.<P>Keep up the good work.<P>God Bless

Ditto from Downunder, NSR<P>I know I've said it to you before - you really are wonderful.<P>It was things you said that helped me start praying again, and for that, I thank you.<P>I hope your W wakes up and smells the roses, where the grass is genuinely green. With you.<P>Jo

Thank you Empty Shell and Jo,<P>As part of my work with the young children at my church... I teach how important it is to<BR>"console the downhearted"...<P>Knowing I can touch just a few lives here... maybe bring them back (a little) to their faith... provide a glimmer of hope... have them say a prayer, when they might not have for a while... gives me a little consolation too!<P>I pray long and hard for my W...<BR>I prefer not to think of her as a fool...<BR>but more as a lost sheep... being a little sick in this addiction of an affair... <P>Sometimes, I wonder... should I go out and find my lost sheep... and when I come to this forum... I realize that my Father in heaven <B>is</B> searching her out... through <B>your</B> thoughts and wishes and prayers... She has strayed a bit too far... so the road back is taking a little longer. <P><B>You</B> people here bring out what is good and pleasing...<BR><B>You</B> open hearts... and heal wounds...<BR><B>You</B> are the faceless gifts... of God's Love.<P>Jim

NSR,<P>I have to agree with the others. You are a bEacon of hope in this cruel world of adultry.<P>Your understanding of Dr.H's ideas has helped me stay focussed on the tasks that face me dayly.<P>Please don't stop,<P>Bill<P>------------------<BR>BB<BR>

NSR, <P>I have to send my thumbs up as well.<P>I have found your posts to be very insightful and encouraging. I also saw your website and was impressed with your devotion to your wife. <P>You're a good man.<P>SHA

Bill and SHA,<P>Thank you both for the compliments... <P>I don't think I've read a "self-help" book like <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi6070_sa.html" TARGET=_blank>"Surviving An Affair"</A> as thoroughly... as this one.<P>I don't profess to be an expert...<BR>I don't want to come across as one... I'm not!<BR>But when a glaring situation sticks out...<BR>Or when the newbies come here in total confusion...<P>A few simple reminders... like you've said Bill... to "stay focused"... and not just wonder aimlessly... helps... even for those who have been here a while.<P>SHA... my web site needs to be updated a bit... (maybe still a little to LB-ish) but you're right about one thing... I am devoted to my marriage.<P>------------------<P>I really admire everyone here...<BR>It seems the replies are getting more "in depth"... and helpful... If not in "what to do"... then in moral support!<P>When you follow the Harley principles and things just aren't working out... like my last post... <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum1/HTML/010170.html" TARGET=_blank>Remind me to not LB! Prayers please!</A>... that moral/spiritual support is the <B>most</B> important gift you can share!<P>Jim

Jim,<P>You are correct in that SAA is the best self help book I have read also. Dr H's principles and analogies are so simple and straight forward it's frightening at times.<BR>It's become my "basic textbook" for understanding and recovering from infidelity.<P>The same week I started posting here I called DR.H. on his radio show. He talked with me for 20 minutes. He was just as insightful in person as he is in his books. He pretty much summed up my situation by asking me a couple of questions. I wish I could afford to go to Min. with my W and use him for our councelor. I can't so I'll continue to use his "text" as my guide through all this mess. Robin and I found a good councelor at our church, and she has continued to see him. Hope springs eternal in my heart. God is in control and he has a plan. Mt church has a web page withour pastors sermons on it last month he preached about marrige.WOW! it was like he was sitting at my kitchen table. I've rambled enough, I need ti get some sleep. <P>Keep The Faith and remember like the Veggie Tales say:GOD IS BIGGER THAN THE BOOGIE MAN!<P>God Bless, I'm praying for you,<P>Bill<P>Churches web page <A HREF="http://www.hgbc.org" TARGET=_blank>www.hgbc.org</A> <BR><P>------------------<BR>BB<BR>

HI Jim,<BR> My thumbs up too!! You've been a lot of help to me. I pray for ALL of us here. God Bless you. FRANK<P>------------------<BR>desperate<BR>"If yesterday didn't stop today, Why should TODAY stop tomorrow??" <BR>"Wisdom is why!!"<P>

Oh ya, I LOVE your welcoming messages... it's as if you work here at MB or something <P>You're a very good man with a heart of gold... and I almost typed "a heart of god"... not so far off, I think!<P>------------------<BR>Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss it you are among the stars!!

Frank... <BR>I'm gald you said... you'll pray for <B>ALL</B> of us here...<BR>A prayer for one... is always meant as a prayer for <B>ALL</B>!<P>~Sheryl... <BR>Being welcomed into this family of love... when I was welcomed meant alot to me... We all can relate to the <I>newbies</I>... can't we! I don't work for MB... I work for whoever I can touch with a word of comfort... or just a shoulder(or ear) to lean on.<P>Jim

Hey Jim,<P>I must say that you have welcomed new members in the best way possible.<P>Just one question. Do you really work as a software instructor? Your'e here more than I am and I don't do anything.<P>Your'e the best, W is the fool. One day she will realize that!<P>------------------<BR>Wishing us all the Best.<P>Medic<P><BR>

Medic...<P>Yes, I do work...<BR>When I'm not teaching (in the classroom) I do find time in between my other responsibilities to stop by...<P>btw... how hard is it to copy/paste in almost the same text everytime someone new comes along?... Haven't you noticed almost <B>all</B> my posts to the newbies is almost identical... just a little personalization added.<P>All those "quotes", keywords, booklists, cross-references to previous posts... etc... I just put into a simple text file and copy and paste them. It does cut down on typos too!<P>I will be changing jobs... hopefully in the next few weeks... and will have a little less time to stop by... but while I can... I do! <P>Thanks for the encouragement. <P>How did this ever make it to a second page?<P>Jim<p>[This message has been edited by NSR (edited December 01, 1999).]

Jim,<P>Please don't take my comments the wrong way that I'm busting on you. I really think your'e a great guy.<P>You can tell me about the copy and paste stuff all you want. I have no clue how to do half of this stuff. I just figured out how to do the smiley thingies.<P>BUT, if you are having a heart attack or trouble breathing then I can help.<P>You are doing more than a great job of welcoming the new folks.<BR><P>------------------<BR>Wishing us all the Best.<P>Medic<P><BR>