Oh boy, is this a big one for me!! As you all probably already know my husband is deep into alcoholism. His relationships with others who drink is what prompted him to fall off the wagon. He was sober for five years when our son was little. In 1991 he got a job where his boss bought beer for all the guys every night after work, and encouraged his employees to drink with him. My H made it 8 months working there before he finally gave in and started drinking again. He felt so bad that first night he came home drunk that he cried and begged me not to divorce him, he promised me he would never do it again, etc. He couldn't do it. The others he worked with gave him a real hard time about not drinking, especially his boss. My H started drinking in secret, did this for a while, then openly drank. Gradually got worse until he was drinking himself into a stupor every night. He still drinks way too much, he cannot have just one. I truly feel his relationships with others who drink perpetuate this. He doesn't have any friends who go to church or don't drink. The men he associates are all hard living, hard drinking construction workers. My H seems to seek out jobs where drinking and partying is the norm. His current job is the same, drinking after work every night. <P>Lately I have been praying for the Lord to bring Christian men into my husband's life. On page 133, paragraph 3 Stormie talks about a friend of hers whose husband is not a Christian that they pray for him to have contact with Christians where he works made me feel so encouraged. I know it is God's will for my husband to come to know the Lord, and truly believe this will happen someday, so even though he never mentions it, there surely are Christians somewhere he has been in contact with. I'm going to add a request to my prayers every day and night that the Lord bring my H Christian friends and co-workers. I'll be using Stormie's prayer on page 134 pretty much verbatim. <P>Another relationship that I've been praying for in my husband's life is his relationship with my daughter. She moved out at 17 because of the cruel and hateful things my husband did and said to her over the years when I was not around (after my H and I separated she began telling me of the verbal and physical abuse she endured from him when he started drinking again. She was terrified to tell me when this happened - she was afraid he would hurt us both). My daughter tried to make amends with him about 3 years ago, but my husband did not respond. She has since given up on him altogether. She was very very happy when we separated last summer. She is such a precious jewel to me, I cannot bear to hurt her, so I don't bring him with me to her house or ask her to spend any time around him. My husband has told me several times since we got back together that he was going to go see her and ask her to forgive him, but he has not done this. He knows how much she despises him. <P>Enough about that. Our husband's relationships with other Christians is so important. Stormie's statement in the prayer "Show him the importance of godly friendships and help me encourage him to sustain them. give us believing married couples with whom we can feel comfortable sharing our lives" is so true. If our husbands were to associate with other strong Christians, surely some of their positive thinking would rub off on them! I pray that each of our husbands has continued contact with godly men and form positive relationships with Christians that they can share with. I also pray that the negative, detrimental friendships be removed from their lives.

I also have been praying for God to place new people in my H's life... Right now ALL of the people he hangs with are those that excepted his affair...This to me is really a shut up and pray situation... boy do I have 2c for this one.. <P>Oh my, I look at these chapters and I see so much I need to pray for... I had better keep busy and pray without ceasing...<P>Lord first illuminate my mind and the others here so we can learn how to prioritize prayers for our husbands... Only you Lord know what needs to be first and what last.. I ask that you work through all of the prayers going up on our husbands behalf and ask that you work wonders in all the marriages that are involved here... God give us glimpses of your power at work so that we may not give up hope during these difficult circumstances... IJN Amen...<P><P>------------------<BR>Jesus is the only answer!<BR>His blessings, Cozy

"God give us glimpses of your power at work so that we may not give up hope during these<BR> difficult circumstances." AMEN Cozy!

AW,<P>Our closest friends are a couple who have been through hell and back again. They are both committed christians and I know my H and I would of never made it without them. When discovery occurred they were just as shocked as me but they never left our side. They stuck with us like glue and helped us to find our way through the pain and the hurt.<P>They still are with us and I have called them up many a time to intervene when my H and I were at an impasse.<P>The reason I go into all of this is to encourage you. The man is a recovering alcoholic who in most ways and some you haven't mentioned sounds like your H. God reached in his heart after many years of drunkenness and carousing and saved him. His wife was always a christian and she went through the pain of all of this plus finding out a child had been born to another woman during her husbands life of sin.<P>This couple has been our lifeline from God. There very likely could come a day when this will be your story to a hurting couple like my H and me. God can still use your H mightily.<P>Keep on praying, keep on trusting, we worship a God of miracles.<P>Blessings, Taj<P>------------------<BR>"Perfect love casts out fear" I John 4:18

Taj, thank you so much for your post. It made me cry, knowing that there are others who have been through this he**. It sounds like your friends have been through a lot of the same things that I am going through now. Praise God that they have been there for you and your husband. It gives me so much hope to know that there can be recovery, there can be salvation. I believe God is working on my H, I just haven't seen the results yet. It would be such a tremendous testimony to the Lord for my husband to become a Christian believer. He's been in the gutter so many times but I guess he hasn't hit bottom yet. Now if I can just stop crying....