Hi My H moved out Friday night while I was at work. He(with all three of my kids home) packed every stitch of clothing, a stereo, and other items packed up and moved in with his girlfriend. He even took the computer. This is one I went out and bought yesterday. Does anyone know can I get him for abandonment and change locks and keep him out until I get my money to move out? And will he have to pay the bills etc. Thanks.

brokenandshattered --<P>I am no expert on this, but see an attorney as soon as possible. You need to make sure the bills are paid and cannot expect him to volunteer to do it. It makes me sad to read here of people trusting the absent spouse to do what is right when that is the last thing to expect them to do.<P>Protect the kids, first. See an attorney and find out for sure what your rights are and what you can legally expect from H. You need to get some stabilization at home before you proceed with the marriage.<P>Also, keep posting here and let us know how we can help. You have friends here.

Oh, Broken, I'm sorry.<P>See an attorney right away and find out what you can do to protect yourself and your kids financially.<P>We're here w/ you if you need us.<P>{{{{{{{{{{{{Brokenandshattered}}}}}}}}}}}}<P>Lori

{{{{{{{{{{<B>brokenandshattered</B>}}}}}}}}}}<P><B>You really need to get legal help RIGHT AWAY!</B><P>To <B>protect</B> yourself leagally (and/or financially)... I usually make the recommendation of finding a <B>good</B> attorney. A good place to start off is at the <A HREF="http://lawyers.martindale.com/marhub/form/by.html" TARGET=_blank>Martindale-Hubbell Lawyer Search</A> site. Do a search within your county... look for only "family law" specialists... make sure they do a lot of "family law committee work"... if they know the judges all the beter... You can norally find a few that will give initial counselling free of charge.<P>I'm sorry you had to end you holiday weekend like this...<P>First thing tonight look up <B>all</B> good attorney's...<P>I've been through something like this myself...<BR>If you are distraught... and I don't know how you couldn't be... I'll be glad to help... personally!<P>email me at imherczeg@yahoo.com<P>Jim...

brokenandshattered -- I have been where you are right now. I know the devastation and the hurt you are feeling right now. <BR>I'm so sorry for you and your children.<P>The others have given you some very good advice so far, especially NSR and the link he provided.<P>So I will simply say that you are welcome here. Please come talk with us any time you need. We DO know what you are going through.<P>God Bless

brokenandshattered,<P>How DEVASTATING for you and your kids that he snuck around them packing up and moving out. How INSENSITIVE!!!!!! ;(<P>I would not put anything past a person who could be so cruel in front of the kids. There is a better way to move out that sneak and rush around in FRONT of them while you were out! You definitely need legal advice - call a lawyer ASAP!<P>Roll Me Away<P>------------------<BR>"Life is made up, not of great sacrifices or duties, but of little things in which smiles and kindnesses and small obligations, given habitually, are what win and preserve the heart and secure comfort."<P>Sir Humphry Davy<BR>

Broken, can't say enough how much I would re-enforce the idea of an attorney! You really need to protect the children now and the only way to do that is to protect yourself as well. If he owns the house as well I would check with an attorney weather or not it's acceptable to change the locks, he has legal rights as well. Also, if you have any proof whatsoever of the affair bring it with you and leave it with the attorney! Watch out, the electric, cable, ect. bills, if they are in his name, I've seen some pretty lousy guys turning things off for the money-protect yourself as soon as you can. Also, in some states you can request the payment of the attorney through the divorce to be made by him, I would threaten him with this as well, since most attorneys require some kind of money down, some will work with you on this, but still be as picky as you can! <BR>May God Bless you! And remember we are here for you!<P>------------------<BR>Chick's <BR>Bren<P>You won't see things until your ready to not be blind!<P><BR>

Thank you all for your support and friendliness. I do have a call into my lawyer. I left a message at his office to call but lawyers have their own lives and hopefully Ill hear from him tomorrow. I have already filed for a divorce but it is so hard. I keep thinking of the 20 years weve had. Last year at this time I was trying to come to terms with my mom passing away(Nov!$th) and this year Im dealing with this. sometimes I think its just not worth it but then I look at my children and see it is.<BR>I question God and look to Him for guidance but He doesnt seem to be there. But I try I carry on as best I can. I wont leave Him Ill wonder and rant and rave but I wont leave Him. I guess He wants me to learn something through this hard year. Ive had a bad one and I have seen my H has not been there for me.I think finding this place might be a big help as Ive read so many questions inquireis here and you all seem so nice and just there for those of us in need to ask or just to spout out. Thank you and God Bless.<BR>Michele

{{{{{{{{{{<B>Michele</B>}}}}}}}}}},<P>I gave a little advice on finding an attorney earlier...<P>Is your's a specialist in "family law"...<P>This is <B>very</B> critical...<BR>You can lose tens of thousands of $$$, custody of the kids, and so much more!<P>If, you don't get a <B>really</B> knowledgable... and able lawyer!<P>Thinking and praying for you!<P>Jim