My H packed his things and left today... The withdrawls got the best of him because he couldn't quit the contact... I told him today I feel like a widow..<P>What do you do from here? Lor you were here just a short time ago, any words of wisdom?<P>------------------<BR>Jesus is the only answer!<BR>His blessings, Cozy

Oh Cozy, I have had you on my heart so much the past few days. Even checked the search files to see if you had posted somewhere else. I know you have been extra busy with your job but I missed hearing from you.<P>Your H hasn't come to the end of himself yet. He needs to come to the end of his rope and find Jesus at the other end. The OP is just a symptom of your H looking for love in all the wrong places. Jesus is the only one who can fulfill the vaccum in our heart.<P>Hang in there sweetie, it is tough going but if God asks it of you then you know He feels you have what it takes and will supply you with His wisdom and strength.<P>Lord, strengthen cozy with your might. Give her the ability to focus only on You and allow You to be her husband for the time being. Bring her H to the end of His rope and make sure he sees You are the only one who can give him the love he is seeking. Father, comfort and encourage cozy and fill her with the knowledge that You are Sovereign and in control of even that which looks out of control and hopeless. IJN<P>Cozy, lean hard on Jesus and He will sustain you.<P>Blessings, Taj<BR><P>------------------<BR>"Perfect love casts out fear" I John 4:18

Prayers going up for you right now!! <P>I am so sorry this has happened to you, my heart breaks for you cozy. I wish I could reach out and hug you, but I can send you a cyber-hug {{{{{{{Cozy}}}}}}}<P>Dear Lord, I lift up Used2BCozy to you right now, asking you to comfort her, fill her with the peace that passes all understanding. Lord, your child's heart is breaking, wrap your arms around her, and comfort her deeply. Please carry her through this trial. Take care of her, Lord. IJN AMEN.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart... I know I have a heart for it is shredded and in much pain... This man has done this to me for 5 years and Im still waiting for my miracle? I must be brain dead.<P>I know with our babies 1st birthday coming up and our 10th anniversary also, that March will be very bad...<P>H didn't fight said I did nothing wrong that I am an excellent wife.... said he was confused and had some choices that he had to make and soon... So, last night we made love, he said he loved me for the first time in about 3 weeks and then told me he was going to miss me and his girls... Poof, just like that... <P>OW was very angry H missed OC's Bday and Im sure will make sure he misses his daughters. Life really sucks, thank God there is a heaven waiting for us!<P>As I was reading "His Repentance" whatever chapter that was, sitting in my car on the end of a pier after delivering a meal to the Coast Gaurd Ship, The Lord let me know that my H will not be worth any effort untill he is repentant... This has to be my first and formost prayer, please join me in this! <P>I know now that when he runs around validating what he has done that there is nothing there for me anyway, so now is the time for God to do His mighty work. Im too tired to even think about this whole mess.. <BR>I know what to look for now if my H turns around again down the road... Humble, Surrendered Repence.. Remorse with no excuses! <P>The girls really don't know yet whats going on, as I took them shopping when I knew he would be packing and leaving.. Another thing to pray about.<P>Is it any wonder I just want to give up and say THATS IT, I QUIT! But I would need Gods go ahead and since I have always felt God had plans to restore and God doesn't change His mind I will just wait on the Lord...<P><P>------------------<BR>Jesus is the only answer!<BR>His blessings, Cozy

Cozy,<P>It takes such courage to do what you are doing. The easy way is not the narrow way. God is refining and perfecting you. Know you are complete in Him, that is what the scripture says. <P>The verse that stands out right now is Galatians 2:20 "I am crucified with Christ, nevertheless I live yet not I but Christ lives in me, and the life I now live I live by faith in the Son of God who loves me and gave Himself for me".<P>Cozy, God lives in you and He is living through you. You may be the only one who can show God's love to your husband. He sounds like he is confused and unable to see reality.<P>Trust God Cozy to do His work of grace in your situation. You are going to need to really focus on what the Word of God says, the enemy wants nothing more then to render you hopeless. Your hope is in God and He will keep you in the shelter of His will.<P>I will pray for your girls as well, they need "holy blinders" for this one.<P>God Bless, Taj<P>------------------<BR>"Perfect love casts out fear" I John 4:18

Oh Cozy...I weep for you and your kids. I'm waiting on my H's repentence and heart-change as well. But, as you know, with so many repeated separations, you get to the point of HOW WOULD I KNOW? WILL IT EVER BE REAL?<P>I've completely given my H to God. I simply do not care how H spends his time. Or where. Or with whom. Not caring hurts nearly as much as caring did, but it doesn't drive me as crazy. You can read my last posts in this forum for how much turmoil AND emptiness I feel.<P>I don't really have any words of wisdom...other than don't blame God, your H is making these stupid choices, not God. God merely allows for the choices and the Enemy entices. Pray especially for your H's safety. My H spent some nights contemplating suicide--one of the Enemy snares "your wife and daughters will be better off without you on this earth." Pray against this lie--even in separation and divorce your children need their dad on the earth. <P>If you (or anyone else) would like to email me Amelia@aol.com<P>{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Cozy}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}<P>Lor

H has already said those awful words, "You would all be better off without me". This has scared me before, but I hear it every time hes left, so I see it as just an excuse now. Also H has thought about suicide before too, but that I don't think he could accomplish for he is too fearful of death.<P>H had a dream the other night that he just said hes put off as "just a dream" but I believe it was a vision and warning from God... It took place with him in the tub and Satan coming to him to steal his soul.. God was on the sidelines allowing it...<P>What do you think???? I would have hit the floor and repented the instant I woke up!!! H wakes up in a cold chilling sweat, with his heart racing out of control, and just puts it off.....YIKES<P>I know that OW would not let H see his son as long as H was living with me his wife, and also threatened to move very far away so he'd never see him again.... you don't wanna know how I feel about her right now... How can I separate the sin from the sinners right now so that I don't feel so much anger-bitterness-resentment etc.. etc...etc...<P>Thank you gals for your prayers, I am coping actually better today than I thought I would, and I believe its the prayers going up on my behalf from all of you here..<P>------------------<BR>Jesus is the only answer!<BR>His blessings, Cozy

Cozy,<BR> A comforting song for you from singer Pam Rozell<P>Never so Near<P>I know you feel alone in your struggle<BR>Like no one understands where you are<BR>And it's hard to trust in prayer<BR>When it seems like no one's there<BR>But Jesus has His ear to your heart<P>CHORUS<P>Though He seems far away<BR>You can trust that He is near<BR>You may not see His hand<BR>But He is dryng every tear<BR>And when you turn to HIm<BR>His love will swallow every fear<BR>For He his holding you<BR>And molding you<BR>And He has never been so near<P>There's a small whisper<BR>Inside of you<BR>That's telling you to rest in His care<BR>He heals and He redeems<BR>Repairs our broken dreams<BR>There's not a pain you feel<BR>That He won't share<P>When we learn to walk by faith<BR>We learn a truth we've never known<BR>That when we're held in hands of grace<BR>Our hearts will never be alone.<P>{{{{COZY}}}}

"We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.: (2 cor 4:8-9) Seek and see the Light in a world of darkness. Hugs to you, sister. Blessings, J

Soooooo.... Again with my question...<P>What do I do? He chose to leave, to move into his grandmas place so that he could see OW/OC (I think OW's Bday is today)... Do I Plan A? Plan B? or is there another Plan J (Jesus) for some of us? ....<P>I thought about just sending a prayer for him daily via e-mail... no questions, no real chatter, just earnest standing in the gap for him and letting him see the prayers. He always appreaciated my praying for him.<P>?????????????????????????????????????????????<P><BR> <P>------------------<BR>Jesus is the only answer!<BR>His blessings, Cozy

I like that, Plan J for Jesus!!! <P>Well, you and God will decide what plan is right for you. Plan J would be my pick if it were me, I think. <P>Cozy, you seem to be holding up well during this. You are in my prayers, I think about you a lot. I hope that we will be able to keep you encouraged, and that the Lord will use this time to work on your H's heart. <P>God bless you Cozy, you are a wonderful Christian, and I for one am so glad you're here. <P>MTAW

You are all so encouraging! I don't know how I would do this without sisters in the Lord that are willing to stand up for me in prayer and be so edifying... I really feel blessed by your concern, prayers, songs, scriptures and all the hugs.<P>This is the only place to be when in this type of crisis I feel.. I went up to the infidelity section, and I just don't feel like I fit in anywhere.... There is no area that seems to fit my current mess... But Jesus always has a place for us!<P>I want to encourage my H this evening with a prayer concerning him finding himself complete and lacking nothing as he turns to the Lord... If he is like me, I always end up wiping tears, as I read someones heartfelt prayer on my behalf.<P>Thanks to all my great sisters here in the Lord, Bless you all this day! <P>In His Care, Cozy

Cozy,<P>I do think heartfelt prayer might be a good thing if you can keep it filled with love, for strength, for wisdom, for clarity of mind, for his work, etc. Nothing that would make him feel guilty on your part, only that you love him.<P>

Cozy, I send my H prayers or just forward devotions I receive daily. I did this even when we were far apart. I wasn't quite sure how he felt about them because he never said anything. I did ask once, do you mind me sending these, and he said no, he liked to get them. But there was never any discussion or anything. One day, I decided not to send them. We really weren't communicating and I was at the point where I was tired of "trying" all the time. Before you know it, I received an email asking me where the devotion/prayer was. That day I said I was drained & had nothing else to give - how about him offering up a prayer for us that day. Much to my amazement, he sent one back. Since then, I pretty much send one every day. Not necessarily prayers for us or our marriage, but devotionals and general prayers that will hopefully work on his heart. You could give it a try! Blessings, J

I sent my H prayers off and on through our separations. I also sent jokes. He kept them all and has sent some of them back to me now that I'm the one who isn't willing to work on the marriage.<BR> <A HREF="http://devotionals.crosswalk.com/NeilAnderson" TARGET=_blank>http://devotionals.crosswalk.com/NeilAnderson</A> <P>sends daily devotionals or Bible verses. I know I've seen others post sites.<P>

Cozy,<BR>I feel like the plan A is a plan J. I know how you feel and its hard, just lean on our Lord and he will see you through. When you don't think you have the strength, God will give it to you. I don't post often, I do read, and it is hear these wonderful ladies pray for and with me and I thank God for them. They dont know me, the the extra strength God gives me often comes from them. I so thankful they are here for people like me, when I get down I can always come here and they pray and give me the encouragement I need. God will give you the strength, peace, and wisdom you need to do his will. Right here is one place that you will get help they are always eager to pray with you, give you words of wisdom, and from that you will find peace. Good luck and I will pray.

keep up the encouragment, it helps! Don't know why, but today seems worse than yesterday... Maybe I was in shock...<P>I did send a prayer this morning to H in reply to a short e sent to me. He said he visited his brother and just a bit about that, not much more... ? <P> Confusion is where I am today.. I need prayer for clarity of mind I think, I hate it when my brain goes so fast that I cant grasp one thought and work it out before another is crowding in. I have so much to do, and no focus..<P><P>------------------<BR>Jesus is the only answer!<BR>His blessings, Cozy