I have had a particularly hard morning. My huband and family went on a family outing Friday night. Towards the end of it, the OM came strutting in. Very cocky. Very sure of himself.<P>I felt like Satan had delivered a defiant kick right into my teeth. I was shattered. <P>Ofcourse my husband was very upset, very mad ect. I held all of this bottled up inside of me for two days. Trying to pray, get passed this, not letting the enemy win. I was not successful. I fell apart. I just broke today. I cried and cried and cried. My husband loves me too much. I realy don't deserve this kind of love. I have hurt him so bad. But, he is here. He held me and let me cry. He made me see something i hadn't been able to see. <P>I thought he was angry with me. This is what he said," I was not angry with you but with him. the disrespect from him after you told him to leave you alone. But, I was angry with him because i saw that you were totally unable to deal with him there. I saw all the love and happiness drain from your face and you become a robot. Unable to think or move."<P>Please keep me uplifted in prayer. I am so down. I wrote to my mom this morning and this is what she sent me. It really helped me and I wanted to share it with you all...<P><BR> Burdens <P>"Why was my burden so heavy?" I slammed the bedroom door and leaned against it. Is there no rest from this life? I wondered. I stumbled to my bed and dropped onto it, pressing my pillow around my ears to shut out the noise <BR>of my existence. <BR> <BR>"Oh God," I cried, "let me sleep. Let me sleep forever and never wake up!" With a deep sob I tried to will myself into oblivion, then welcomed the blackness that came over me. Light surrounded me as I regained consciousness. <BR>I focused on its source: the figure of a man<BR>standing before a cross. <BR> <BR> "My child," the person asked, "why did you want to come to Me before I am <BR>ready to call you?" <BR> <BR> "Lord, I'm sorry. It's just that... I can't go on. You see how hard it is for me. Look at this awful burden on my back. I simply can't carry it anymore." <BR> <BR> "But haven't I told you to cast all of your burdens upon Me, because I care for you? My yoke is easy, and My burden is light." <BR> <BR> "I knew You would say that. But why does mine have to be so heavy?" <BR> <BR> "My child, everyone in the world has a burden. Perhaps you would like to try a different one?" <BR> <BR> "I can do that?" <BR> <BR> He pointed to several burdens lying at His feet. "You may try any of these. All of them seemed to be of equal size. But each was labeled with a name. <BR> <BR> "There's Joan's," I said. Joan was married to a wealthy businessman. She lived in a sprawling estate and dressed her three daughters in the prettiest designer clothes. Sometimes she drove me to church in her Cadillac when my <BR>car was broken. <BR> <BR> "Let me try that one." How difficult could her burden be? I thought. <BR> <BR> The Lord removed my burden and placed Joan's on my shoulders. I sank to my knees beneath its weight. <BR> <BR> "Take it off!" I said. "What makes it so heavy?" <BR> <BR> "Look inside." <BR> <BR> I untied the straps and opened the top. Inside was a figure of her Mother-in-law, and when I lifted it out, it began to speak. <BR> <BR> "Joan, you'll never be good enough for my<BR>son," it began. "He never should have married you. You're a terrible mother to my grandchildren..." <BR> <BR>I quickly placed the figure back in the pack and withdrew another. It was Donna, Joan's youngest daughter. Her head was bandaged from the surgery that had failed to resolve her epilepsy. <BR> <BR> A third figure was Joan's brother. Addicted to drugs, he had been convicted of killing a police officer. <BR> <BR>"I see why her burden is so heavy, Lord. But she's always smiling and <BR>helping others. I didn't realize..." <BR> <BR> "Would you like to try another?" He asked quietly. <BR> <BR> I tested several. Paula's felt heavy: She was raising four small boys without a father. Debra's did too: a childhood of sexual abuse and a marriage of emotional abuse. When I came to Ruth's burden, I didn't even try. I knew <BR>that inside I would find arthritis, old age, a demanding full-time job, and a beloved husband in a nursing home. <BR> <BR>"They're all too heavy, Lord," I said. "Give back my own." <BR> <BR> As I lifted the familiar load once again, it seemed much lighter than the <BR>others. <BR> <BR> "Lets look inside" He said. <BR> <BR> I turned away, holding it close. "That's not a good idea," I said. <BR> <BR> "Why?" <BR> "There's a lot of junk in there." <BR> <BR> "Let Me see." <BR> <BR> The gentle thunder of His voice compelled me. I opened my burden. <BR> <BR> He pulled out a brick. <BR> <BR> "Tell me about this one." <BR> <BR> "Lord, You know. It's money. I know we don't suffer like people in some countries or even the homeless here in America. But we have no insurance, and when the kids get sick, we can't always take them to the doctor. They've <BR>never been to a dentist. And I'm tired of dressing them in hand-me-downs." <BR> <BR>"My child, I will supply all of your needs ... and your children's.<BR>I've given them healthy bodies. I will teach them that expensive clothing doesn't make a person valuable in My sight." <BR> <BR>Then He lifted out the figure of a small boy. "And this?" He asked. <BR> <BR> "Andrew..." I hung my head, ashamed to call my son a burden. "But, Lord, he's hyperactive. He's not quiet like the other two. He makes me so tired. <BR>He's always getting hurt, and someone is bound to think I abuse him. I yell at him all the time. Someday I may really hurt him...." <BR> <BR> "My child," He said, "if you trust Me, I will renew your strength, If you allow Me to fill you with My Spirit, I will give you patience." <BR> <BR>Then He took some pebbles from my burden. <BR> <BR>"Yes, Lord," I said with a sigh. "Those are small.<BR>But they're important. <BR>I hate my hair. It's thin, and I can't make it look nice. I can't afford to go to the beauty shop. I'm overweight and can't stay on a diet. I hate all my <BR>clothes. I hate the way I look!" <BR> <BR>"My child, people look at your outward appearance, but I look at your heart. By My Spirit you can gain self-control to lose weight. But your beauty should not come from outward appearance. Instead, it should come from your <BR>inner self, the unfailing beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in My sight." <BR> <BR>My burden now seemed lighter than before. <BR> <BR>"I guess I can handle it now" I said. <BR> <BR> "There is more," He said. "Hand Me that last brick." <BR> <BR>"Oh, You don't have to take that. I can handle it." <BR> "My child, give it to Me." Again His voice compelled me. He reached out His hand, and for the first time I saw the ugly wound. <BR> <BR>"But, Lord, this brick is so awful, so nasty, so.....Lord! What happened to Your hands? They're so scarred!" <BR> <BR> No longer focused on my burden, I looked for the first time into His face. In His brow were ragged scars -- as though someone had pressed thorns into His flesh. <BR> <BR>"Lord," I whispered. "What happened to You?" <BR> <BR> His loving eyes reached into my soul. <BR> <BR> "My child, you know. Hand Me the brick. It belongs to Me. I bought it." <BR> <BR>"How?" <BR> <BR> "With My blood." <BR> <BR> "But why, Lord?" <BR> <BR> "Because I have loved you with and everlasting love. Give it to Me." <BR> <BR> I placed the filthy brick into His wounded palm. It contained all the dirt and evil of my life: my pride, my selfishness, the depression that constantly tormented me. <BR> <BR>He turned to the cross and hurled my brick into the pool of blood at its base. It hardly made a ripple. <BR> <BR> "Now, My child, you need to go back. I will be with you always. When you are troubled, call to Me and I will help you and show you things you cannot imagine now." <BR> <BR>"Yes, Lord, I will call on You." <BR> <BR>I reached to pick up my burden. <BR> <BR>"You may leave that here if you wish. You see all these burdens? They are the ones that others have left at My feet. Joan's, Paula's, Debra's, Ruth's.....When you leave your burden here, I carry it with you. Remember, My yoke is easy and My burden is light." <BR> <BR> As I placed my burden with Him, the light began to fade. Yet I heard Him <BR>whisper, "I will never leave you, nor forsake you." <BR> A peace flooded my soul. <BR>"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." (Matthew 11:28-30) <BR>Author Unknown To Me <P>" I can do all things through HIM who strengthens me..."<BR>Mercy<BR>

Thank you Mercy.... It too, is just what I needed.<P>BabyDoll

Wow mercy, I really liked this story. So many times we get so caught up in our problems that we forget that others are carrying a very heavy burden also, many times much heavier than the one we're carrying. How much better it would be if we could all find the strength to turn our burdens over the the Lord to handle. He has already paid the price for our sins. We just need to ask Him to take over, for He is far more able to repair our broken relationships than we are. <BR>And yes, I'm telling myself this because I am the worst about not giving it up to Him! <P>Thanks so much for posting, Mercy.

It is so exciting to see how God is growing you into His image, how your husband has become so protective of you and how the two of you are learning to communicate in a whole different way! for your hubby to be able to share that he was angry at the OM in regards to not being sensitive to you is so cool!<P>Father, continue to bring this couple closer and closer to You and restore their marriage even greater than they could imagine. Bond their hearts as one and help them to beat in unison. IJN, Amen