You all know my goal for yesterday, the desire to ask for forgivenss for specific things and the foreboding due to the immediate negative attitude upon his awakening. Well, it never happened, after reading Frank Peretti's This Present Darkness I could picture this evil thing digging it's claws into the back of my husband's head, whispering into his ears. The garbage that came out of his mouth, the accusations that I don't love him, that I get a kick out of torturing him, etc. just flowed heavily...he is tortured by his thoughts and I prayed for protection for him all day, that God would clear his mind, that he would not cling to the messages that his emotions were telling him. The battle continued through the night and is still going strong this morning. <P>There was only one point yesterday where my emotions slipped into the open, the very raw hurt that he cannot see what is happening here, the battle that is going on. My act of of affection and tenderness were perceived as "teasing". <P>I have to say though, that through this all, I am experiencing a different kind of strength. Where in the past, I would prefer to just give up and to let him rot, I feel a different kind of thing, a concern for his mind and mental condition, I see this little boy stuck and he doesn't know how to get out of it. <P>When a young child gets out of control, you can hold them and let them rage in safety so they won't hurt themselves or anyone else. You can hold them afterwards and let them sob sob until there are no more sob sobs. You can feel such a bond with that child. Perhaps this what I am seeing now, though I have doubts (Forgive my unbelief Father)that perhaps the Father is waging this war and is holding my husband while he is going through the sob sobs, for the crying is persistent. I do wish that he would go to a Christian Counselor or even in the state he is in to a Christian hospital.<P>It is hard to watch this battle, feeling that strong sense to pray, pray and then pray. Whether I have detached from the emotions or whether the Father is giving me His peace thoughout, I do not know. I just ask for your prayers to join mine for my dear Husband. Thanks.

Our gracious Heavenly Father, Thank You for your unending love for each of us. We thank you with the deepest gratitude for our salvation and for hearing our cries for help. Lord, we need you so much, we cannot make it through our storms without you, give us Your strength to make it through the tests of our faith with Your victory. Please give SueB an extra measure of Your strength and Your wisdom today. Lead her Lord into the perfect peace that only You can provide, bringing her rest, a calm and peaceful heart. Let her not grow weary in doing good Father. Lord we are weak but You are so strong, help us to lean entirely upon You. We praise You Lord for the wondrous works You are doing in SueB's husband's life. We are in awe of your almighty power Lord. Thank You Lord Jesus for covering SueB's husband with the Holy Spirit, protecting him from the attacks of the enemy. Thank You Lord for the hedge of thorns placed around SueB's husband right now. Praise You Lord, we give You all our praise. Please cover SueB's husband with the blood of Jesus today and every day, causing the enemy to flee. Give him a calm gentle spirit Lord, soften his heart towards You and SueB. I pray that his mind is cleared of all ugly and evil thoughts brought into it by the enemy. In the name of Jesus I claim the victory for SueB's husband's life. Lord, please draw her husband close to You, filling his heart, his mind and his soul with your love and peace. Show him Lord that Your ways are the ONLY way. Give him that deep conviction from the Holy Spirit to walk in Your way, and no other. Fight the battle for him Lord. Lord, Your word tells us nothing is impossible for You, we stand on this promise. Thank You Lord, thank You. Mere words cannot express the deep gratitude we feel. Please forgive us Lord. In the name of Jesus I pray, AMEN <P>SueB, I will be praying for you both today. God bless You. <P>AW

Oh, Sue, how very hard. <BR>My husband too is plagued by evil, down, hurtful thoughts and doubts about himself a lot of the time also. It is so hard to watch them go through it. Does your husband take antidepressants, or does he deny he needs them. My husband has been on them for 5 years. From time to time he has to get the dosage adjusted, but it does help. He still has ups and downs but the range is less.<BR>Sue did you read the Neal Anderson devotionals of today and yesterday. Talks about the whisperings of satan in our ears and the lies he gives us. It really is a battle for the mind.<BR>God, is indeed giving you a new kind of strength, it is evident in your writing. Stay in Jesus as you are. The battle is not over but it is God's to wage. Can you hold your husband as you explained above or will he not let you near enough?<BR>Sue I had a wonderful prayer time. I got a wonderful prayer about loosing and binding from the sight below:<BR> hhtp://www.geocities.com/Heartland/Grove<BR>oops I gave aw the wrong sight by a letter.<BR>Anyways if you just keep hitting next until you get to the Prayer for Your Spouse Matthew 16:19 Bind and Loose. <BR>Father, Watch over Sue today and give her an extra measure of your love. Father this is a battle for our minds. Lord touch her husband and loose him from the evil that seeks to destroy and control his mind. Lord let Your Spirit break through and give him a sense of peace. Lord, reveal Yourself to her husband and show Him how satisfying you are for everything , Lord. Lord touch Sue in such a way that she knows exactly how to respond to her husband. We praise You for the great things You are showing Sue and this new strength You have given her and she is experiencing from You. Thank You Father for this. Lord. We praise Your name and Your ever presence in our lives, we are not deserving, so thank You.. In Jesus name Amen.

Dear Sue, <P>You can always hold him in spirit. Mentally keep your own arms around his mind, soul, spirit and heart. Support him from a distance if he won't let you close. You have inherent spiritual powers of your own, especially enhanced when supplemented by the Holy Spirit.<P>He may have an entity attached to him. Not necessarily an evil entity either. My husband was apparently bothered by the ghost of his dead father for years. His father died when he was only 13 and may have had a hard time letting go. Some of H's attitudes and beliefs just made no sense at all.<P>One night I prayed for him as he slept. I talked to his father, or his father's spirit, as if he were present, telling him it was time to leave and go on to the spirit world. His son was ready to be independent and could progress unless he left him alone. I explained to the ghost how important it was for him to go towards the light, and his own progress depended on getting to the next level, not being detained here in mortality with his son. I went on and on for about two hours, talking to the spirit of his father, and anything else that might have been present, and praying for help in obtaining relief. <P>The next morning H was a different person. The paranoia was gone. Since that day I have heard no more profanity and invective concerning his mother. The attitudes he used to portray concerning his mother were more typical of a very jealous husband than of a son. He is normal in that department now. <P>I do not know whether he was actually attached or possessed by any ghost, or the spirit of his deceased father, but I can tell you that that one, highly directed prayer and therapy session has made a world of difference. He is getting better faster now. <P>Whatever the theory, it worked. I got the idea for this from a book a friend loaned me, <A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/search-handle-form/103-3700631-3363826" TARGET=_blank>The Unquiet Dead.</A> The psychologist author calls it a gentle dispossession, NOT an exorcism.<P>Let me know what you think. <P>Love, <P>Karenna<BR>

Looked through all the books in that section, Karenna. Pretty interesting, though some of it is New Agish, but overall, since I do so strongly believe that the Lord forewarns that the battle occurs here: "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms" Eph.6:12, I will concentrate prayer this way and see where the Spirit leads.<P>My H's father did die when he was 5 in the garage of their home while working on the family car. The jack slipped and the car fell on him crushing his head. My M-I-L was pregnant with the 3rd child at the time. They had to move and there were many hard adjustments for them all. I do see him still stuck at age 5 in many ways, the whining and crying are so replicative of a 5 year old.<P>Father, I seek You face in this matter, not wanting to deviate from the truth, not wanting to get caught in the evil one's game of the New Age movement. Holy Spirit, guide me in all knowledge and truth, teach me how to pray in ways that would honor the Father and release my husband from his past. Father, I read Neil Anderson's writings and know that the evil and the battle exists. I have seen and heard friend's accounts of incredible magnitude of how You release people from the evil forces at large. Direct us here Lord. IJN, Amen.<P><BR>

SueB,<P>I am not aware of what is going on right now in your life. BUT, I do sense in your post an intensity and seem to pick up a crisis at a crossroad. Please know that I am praying for you and your H.<P>At one point last summer the mood was so heated and intense in my home that I yelled the name of Jesus and commanded the powers of darkness to leave my home. It definately was a crisis at a crossroad and from there things slowly began to get better.<P>I recall my H laughing at me in disgust and telling me I was crazy......<P>Well, I wasn't crazy, I was being led by the Spirit and so in your circumstances are you. <P>Be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. He is leading and for that you can be sure.<P>Father, give SueB Your direction and show her the way. Give her spiritual discernment to know whether to turn to the right or to the left. Use her to show forth truth and reveal evil. Take her hand Lord and lead her through her hour of darkness. I ask that you would once and for all deliver her husband from the stranglehold of the evil one. Where there is fear Lord show your mercy and love and release him from the lies of the past. He is Your child and is dependent upon You to set him free. May You be glorified through his life and deliverance. IJN<BR><P>------------------<BR>"Perfect love casts out fear" I John 4:18

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by SueB:<BR><B> I could picture this evil thing digging it's claws into the back of my husband's head, whispering into his ears. The garbage that came out of his mouth, the accusations that I don't love him, that I get a kick out of torturing him, etc. just flowed heavily...he is tortured by his thoughts </B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Dear Sue, <P>This image you shared led me to share that story of mine. I am certain I was given direction to that from God. New agers may get interested too, but the book was definitely not written by a new age devotee. Not particularly Christian either, a pretty secular therapist all in all. By their fruits ye shall know them. I would not have my H back in his "before" condition for anything!<P>"Often we Christians constitute the worst obstacle for those who try to become closer to Christ; we often preach a gospel we do not live. This is the principle reason why people of the world don't believe." <P>Mother Teresa<P>Love, <P>Karenna<P><BR>

Thanks Karenna,<P>Did some praying as I laid there last night. His mood is a bit better this morning. The problem with me is that I can be as stoic as can be during crisises but once they are over, I fall apart and the tears just won't stay where I want them to. <P>It is raining here today so that will help. Something about sitting outside and watching Him clean the earth is calming for me. Thanks for caring.

Sueb,<BR>I just wanted you to know your in my prayers.<BR>Carol

Sue,<BR>I do the same thing. I heep my emotions pretty well under wrap at the moment, but usually break down later. I use to break down every monday. I called it Monday meltdown. I would keep it all together all weekend and not talk about the hard things when he didn't want to or just have fun. Then Monday would come, he would go back to work and I would literally meltdown. That has stopped, especially since he doesn't live here presently but even when I see his on weekends now it is better. First I am not trying so hard anymore. A combination of two things. I have given it to god and am able to let go of the need to control (most of the time) and secondly I don't try as hard. I realise that as long as she is in the picture it will be near impossible. I worked so hard for the last 4 years trying to control and get him to play along. Just doesn't work.<BR>Sue I am praying for you. It is so hard I know. Sometimes even harder when they are around all the time and you are in a difficult place in the relationship. All you can do is stay in Jesus and pray as we both know.<P>Father, <BR>Keep Sue close to You. Lord you know her needs and the real hunger of her heart. Lord touch that place and take her where you want her to be. Yes, Lord watching the rain does remind us of the cleansing You are performing in us, our husbands and our relationships. Sometimes You have to scub harder to get certain places cleaner and sometimes that hurts. Thank You Lord, for staying with us and making sure we are cleansed and able to come before you. Thank you Jesus. Father reach her husband and tame his angry heart. Take off the blinders and let hem come face to face with You. Thank You Jesus for always being where we are and for never leaving us there. In Jesus name we pray, Amen.

Thanks for the prayers everyone. The day was pretty peaceful and I was able to get a lot of web work done. Hubby icq'd me and we chatted a bit and then I said well let me get this done here and you get that stuff done there and then we will have time to chat when you get home...his response then was oh does that mean I won't have to be all depressed all night then...meaning I am to be nude when he walks in the door! Told him no, so much a for a nice conversation...he is back to the if you really love me garbage...I finally said for him to work as long as he needed to then..he usually works late to punish me. Still expects dinner no matter what time he comes home. I also made a comment that will come back at me too. I told him that his manipulation and guilt trips were the very thing that he complained about in regards to his mother. Maybe I shouldn't have said it, but he doesn't seem to realize that.<P>Father, I am whipped and You know it. I want so hard to honor you and my husband and yet feel so trapped by the stinking thinking of his mind. I know only you can fix him and I can only make changes in myself, so show me what I need to work on myself. Thank you for catching the tears. Thank you for being in control. Thank you for the hardships that will remove the dross. Change me Lord. IJN,Amen.

He tries to PUNISH you?!! What ever you do, you cannot give him the satisfaction of letting ANYTHING be a punishment. Rejoice when he works late. You do not have to hear his garbage.<P>Anything else he uses as punishment? When you detach and look at him as pathetic and not in control of himself it becomes easier to not react the way he wants you to.

Dear Karenna, <BR>I am not acting the way he wants me too therefore he responds in desperation. You know when you try to fill a hole with anything other than the Lord, you do dumb things. The poor guy is trying to control the world according to his standards and the Father has greater plans for him than that.<P>The hard part is keeping my eyes upward and continually praying to see him as the Lord does. satan wants me to give up and not stand in the gap. I am seeing more and more that the Lord wanted me here for that. <P>Shalom.

Hi Sue, this is Essence. Thank you for your prayers. We are getting along better,but he is going out alot, and chatting on the internet with some women. I am praying twice a day for our marriage. Sometime I want to say something about his running the street, but I think he will throw up my mistakes I've made. So I stay queit, and in prayer. Satins gets in my mind and has me thinking all kinds of things, like he is cheating on me, or he has found someone else, but since I started praying I am able to find peace of mind. I just keep telling myself this battle is not mine its the Lords. Sue I will also pray that your h be set free from Satins grip, and that the Lord will build your h up were he is weak and make him strong. I also pray for your strength, and my Jesus bless you and your h in a mighty way

Hi Sue, this is Essence. Thank you for your prayers. We are getting along better,but he is going out alot, and chatting on the internet with some women. I am praying twice a day for our marriage. Sometime I want to say something about his running the street, but I think he will throw up my mistakes I've made. So I stay queit, and in prayer. Satins gets in my mind and has me thinking all kinds of things, like he is cheating on me, or he has found someone else, but since I started praying I am able to find peace of mind. I just keep telling myself this battle is not mine its the Lords. Sue I will also pray that your h be set free from Satins grip, and that the Lord will build your h up were he is weak and make him strong. I also pray for your strength, and my Jesus bless you and your h in a mighty way

Essence, Paul talks to us about praying without ceasing, a running commentary as we go about our business during the day. Every time you think about him, lift him up to the Lord, every dish or piece of clothing you pick up, say a prayer. Scripture says He is our best friend. I am learning so much through this adversity. Hugging you from here.

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by SueB:<P>I am not acting the way he wants me too therefore he responds in desperation. ...<P>The hard part is keeping my eyes upward and continually praying to see him as the Lord does. satan wants me to give up and not stand in the gap. I am seeing more and more that the Lord wanted me here for that. <BR><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>You got it sister! Break the cycle and eventually it will implode. Soon too. I will pray for your H tonight the way I did for mine last year. Won't it be wonderful when he is clean and pure as a little child again? Someday. Visualize his recommittment and repentance!<P><BR>Love, <P>Karenna<BR>

Dear Sue, <P>Many years ago I dated an overweight, demanding, controlling man, an atheist named Ralph. Obviously it didn't work out for us, but I can't help but visualize you with some one very much like him.<P>It struck me this morning that the prayer and praise most effective for bringing a new spirit into my home will probably be music. My piano is buried under furniture and boxes because of the remodel, the only CD's still out are H's. But I can still sing, and I'm sure I can find uplifting and sacred music from somewhere to have on in the evening before H gets home. <P>We have different musical tastes, I like his but he does not particularly care for anything else but his. What do you think?