Hello sisters!<P>I have been deep in prayer and felt this was the best answer, to have many women give me their God-inspired insight on my situation so that I may make a decision that coincides with the will of the Father.<P>By the way: I bought the POPW book today!! SO now I'm really in the group!<P>Ok here's the situation:<P>A year ago I had a PA/EA. It ended quickly, and I confessed. We've made remarkable recovery (thanks to God!!!) and our marriage is better than it was before (and it was pretty great back then!). To meet one of his EN (the $$ thing) I am taking on a job...or two...<P>I accepted a job that will begin next school year, and interviewed last night for a job for summertime. This potential employer was a fellow Christian (even goes to my church, I found out!) and the job is working in the garage of his home with 2 other people 2 days a week in teh evenings. <P>The problem is that I left that interview so upset-I was attracted to him, and repented tearfully on the way home. It wasn't really the man himself, just characteristics that I wished my husband possessed in an attractive package. He is a Christian ( my husband is not) and is divorced. I am certain it was NOT mutual. All in MY head. I told God that I would not accept the job since I was sure this wasn't His will, then came home and told my husband about the experience, and how I would just not take the job.<P>His secretary called today and they are willing to practically bend over backwards to get me to come work for them. MY hours, My terms, everything. It's only part time, and he won't be there when I am. The days are the same days H has off, so I wouldnt' have to pay child care. I can't think of a reason to let my Christian brother down, other than I would be afraid that I couldn't get past my petty problem.<P>After MUCH MUCH prayer I have felt that God is saying "YOU need to learn to deal with this problem you have, and I will not let you stand in the way of my plan because you lack restraint". This whole workign thing has had the feel of "sucking it up and doing what must be done". I feel prepared to do anything I must as far as work and hours etc. to meet H's need for relief of debt.<P>Then again, I know we tend to justify things, and I am seeking for God to speak through at least 3 people for confirmation of either an open door or a closed one.<P>I feel that it would not take much to get past this, as I am deeply in love with my H and he understands the love bank etc. so we're doing very very well He expressed concern about this person depositing units faster than he can, but honestly this other person doesn't even know this is an issue, and is too busy with his ministry and his own life to take time to do that. I also don't want to put myself in a situation where I could have an attraction to someone other than my H. Especially a Christian brother! <P>Please, pray about this if you have time, and write back your honest opinion. I am completely prepared to act on whichever answer the Father provides.<P>Thank you in advance, and PRAISE our FAITHFUL Father that He is a personal GOD! He cares so much about every little detail!<P>------------------<BR>"Love...bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things...LOVE NEVER FAILS..."-ICorinthians13:7,8

I feel that you should take the job,and just pray to God to free you from your temptations. Pray also that the qualitys you find attractive in this man, that God will bless your husband with those same qualilty.

As we are to respect our husbands as the head of the house, for that is the position God has placed them in, I would ask my husband how he would feel about me taking this job. I would tell him that you want to do nothing that would make him feel uncomfortable and the reason you really need his input is that the employer is a divorced person and you want nothing to come between the two of you. You now that there are other jobs out there.<P>Listen to what your husband has to say about it and ask him if he would be willing to pray with you. You might be surprised about how honoring him in this way, may be more of an encouragement and a light to him that any sermon he might hear. My own gut sense would be to not take the job, mostly because of Romans 7 in that we do want to do good, but then we do the very thing we don't want to do....etc. We are to flee from the enemy and not run to it...I feel that is the same with temptations. Will be praying for wisdom for you.

My first thought was if it was me, after intensely seeking the Lord on the issue, I would have to do everything I could to avoid any temptation, and would probably look for a different job. I do agree wholeheartedly with SueB in discussing it and your feelings with your husband, and honestly seek his opinion. Then whatever he says, do it graciously. Our husbands are the head of our households and we should respect their decisions. Asking him to pray with you about is a great idea! <P>Dear Heavenly Father, thank You for restoring Delivered1's marriage. Thank You for her understanding husband. Lord, Delivered1 needs Your wisdom right now, I pray that You will give her an extra measure as she comes to You with the problem of whether or not to accept this job. Lord, please open the doors that lead to Your will, and close those that lead Delivered1 down the wrong path. Bind the enemy so that she is not attacked. Please give her clarity of mind, Lord, guide her every thought, word and action. Lord we trust in You to solve this problem for Delivered1. THank You Father for Your love and help. We praise You Lord, You are truly the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. All Glory and Honor to You Father. IJN I pray, AMEN

Dear Delivered!<P>That is the same answer I got!!! <B>"Deal with it and practice self control."</B> The same issues are just going to crop up over and over until I learn to be as young Joseph in Egypt and reject temptation outright. <P>Someone once said, "If we begin entertaining temptations, they soon begin entertaining us!" So true.<P>There are many levels of handling this kind of emotional temptation. <P>On one level, you: <BR>* think about it, <BR>* think about how bad it would be if you gave in, <BR>* think about how close you could get to the line, <BR>* give him ample opportunity to ingratiate himself,<BR>* play with the notion getting close while lying to yourself about how you know better and would never actually do such a thing,<BR>* getting really close as just friends,<BR>* not feeling guilty about it until ??<BR>***** and so on and so forth.<P>A somewhat higher level involves:<BR>* thinking about it 50% of the time,<BR>* only accepting half of his invitations,<BR>* praying that God will make the temptation go away,<BR>* being a really good friend to him,<BR>* telling all your friends to pray for you,<BR>* feeling guilty about it when you are actually spending time with him,<BR>* starting to pray for your husband and marriage,<BR>* reading the Bible to make the feeling go away.<P>An even higher level of dealing with it involves:<BR>* Acknowledging the feeling as natural,<BR>* Analyzing the psychohistory that led you to the feeling in this circumstance,<BR>* Making a conscious decision to never act out on the feeling toward the OP,<BR>* Never giving the OP the slightest indication of your feelings,<BR>* Thanking God for the blessings of family, friends, work and opportunities,<BR>* Taking the information from your feelings and your own analysis of it home to make your own marriage better and stronger,<BR>* Losing your self in service to others, for Christ's sake.<P>Once you and I graduate from that level, or an even higher one I haven't fathomed yet, I expect the future temptations of that nature will vanish, or be nothing more than an earthworm among the speedbumps of life.<P>Dear Heavenly Father,<BR>We praise thee for the mighty and allpowerful God of the Universe thou art! What wonders and miracle thou hast performed in the hearts of thy children! Thank you for the infinite atonement of Jesus that blesses us and sustains us each day of our lives.<P>Thank you again for these sweet and strong sisters who have joined our little prayer and study group. <P>Thank you for Delivered! and for the miracles and blessings thou hast wrought in her life. Thank you for this new job opportunity that has arisen. Please bless her with a sound mind and clear discernment as to thy will in the matter of accepting this job offer. Give her the strength of will and the courage to do whatever will be the best for her life and her family. Help her to decide to make Joseph's choice and spurn temptation automatically. <P>Please bless us all with this wisdom and courage and strength. We know that we are given choices in order to grow. We understand that it is not possible to evade responsibility for making correct decisions forever. <P>Lead us not into temptation and deliver us from evil! And help us to encourage each other with strength to overcome. Let us each decide for ourselves each day whom we will serve. Let us always serve thee with singleness of heart!<P>We bless thy Holy name forever. In Jesus' name, Amen.

<B>An even higher level of dealing with it involves:<BR>* Acknowledging the feeling as natural,<BR>* Analyzing the psychohistory that led you to the feeling in this circumstance,<BR>* Making a conscious decision to never act out on the feeling toward the OP,<BR>* Never giving the OP the slightest indication of your feelings,<BR>* Thanking God for the blessings of family, friends, work and opportunities,<BR>* Taking the information from your feelings and your own analysis of it home to make your own marriage better and stronger,<BR>* Losing your self in service to others, for Christ's sake. - Karenna</B><P>That is what I feel my spirit is doing. I suppose that's why I feel such a weight lifted as I have accepted the job. I am now working 3 jobs and doing my best to meet H's EN for $$.<P>I have such JOY in the wonderful blessings He is heaping on me! I passed my Commercial Permit test (thanks be to GOD!) for the Bus Driving job, and am so pleased that I am able to continue pressing on to the goals I feel led by teh Father to pursue. I have begun reading POPW and am SO pleased to feel His holy presence so intimately!<P>Thank you for your input, I will keep you posted. <P><P>------------------<BR>"Love...bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things...LOVE NEVER FAILS..."-ICorinthians13:7,8

God bless you, Delivered! Congrats on the great job. Good luck paying down those pesky debts. The Lord hates seeing us with such debts, too. Keep the faith!