I am so glad God has brought me to this site. I need it. I am 28, have two boys, 3 and 4, and a marriage that is hanging by a thread. Please pray for our family. You guys sound like you have all had wonderful advise. I hope to find my way around this website so that I can learn some of the things you have. My H is 27, and to anyone who meets him a very lovable guy, but to us he is very emotionally abusive. He carries around a lot of anger and does not know how to control it. I don't even care to have nice things in our house, because I know that he will just break them when he gets mad. Yesterday was the worse though. He went into a complete fit of rage over my four year old locking himself in the car. He grabbed him so hard that he left marks on his arm. I feel like a terrible mother. I should have never let it get this far. I don't know what to do. I want to take them and leave, but what kind of life will that be for them. He has never hurt them, and was very sorry about yesterday, but he just cannot control his anger. I need help. I'm planning on leaving, and hoping that will lead him to seeking help, but I don't want to do anything to make him worse. He needs the Lord. I know if he would just give everything to Him, he would be a new person. Please pray for me.

If he "accidently" harms your child further, then you really would feel guilty! Go to a safe house to protect your family and then tell him that he needs to go to anger management therapy before you will come home.<P>God does want to restore your marriage but since He gives us free will, your husband will have to want to do the work necessary for it to happen.<P>Father protect this family and give them wisdom and a desire to heal the hurts that have happened. Call this husband and draw hm to you. Help him to see how out of control he is. We ask for your intervention to protect the children. IJN, Amen

If he "accidently" harms your child further, then you really would feel guilty! Go to a safe house to protect your family and then tell him that he needs to go to anger management therapy before you will come home.<P>God does want to restore your marriage but since He gives us free will, your husband will have to want to do the work necessary for it to happen.<P>Father protect this family and give them wisdom and a desire to heal the hurts that have happened. Call this husband and draw hm to you. Help him to see how out of control he is. We ask for your intervention to protect the children. IJN, Amen

Dear cst,<P>SueB is absolutely right. <P>Furthermore, you will know what kind of man and father he is if after you have left and set out your guidelines, he refuses to leave and invite you and the children to stay in the home while he goes to anger management and parenting classes. <P>Feel free to report him to the child abuse hotline after you get out.<P>Is he the biological father of the children?<P>I'm praying for your H as well as for the children and you. God can help to restore your marriage, and your part is to keep the boys and yourself safe while H and God do the work in H's heart.<P>Love, <P>Karenna<P>------------------<BR>A true friend is one who not only is willing to love us the way we are, but is able to leave us better than he found us.

I am praying for you both. I agree with SueB and Karenna, you must protect your children at all costs from any harm from your husband. No matter how sorry he is afterwards, the damage has been done. Pray hard and long for the Lord to convict him mightily about his abuse of you and your children. If you think he is getting angry to the point of inflicting pain again, leave and take the kids with you. My husband is also emotional and physically abusive to me and was to our daughter. If I had known at the time what he had done to my daughter when I wasn't home, I would have divorced him right then, and had him prosecuted. My husband physically abused me before we separated last year and is now court ordered to take batterers intervention classes. Unfortunately he had not started the classes yet. He may very well end up in jail very soon. Might be the best thing for him. <P>You have the upper hand here. Talk this all over with God. If you feel led, tell your husband (at a time when he is calm) in no uncertain terms that if you even think he is letting his anger get out of control you will call the police and have him arrested and will prosecute him to the fullest extent. Let him know that you mean business and will <B>ABSOLUTELY NOT TOLERATE</B> any more of his childish anger fits. If you sit back and do nothing and your husband is abusive to your children again, and the law finds out, you will be counted guilty as is your husband in that you did nothing to stop the abuse. <P>Give this all to God cst. He can and will solve your marital problems. Pray without ceasing. Prayer is the only answer.