JOB 1:8 Then the LORD said to Satan, "Have you considered my servant Job? There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil."<P> JOB 1:9 "Does Job fear God for nothing?" Satan replied. [10] "Have you not put a hedge around him and his household and everything he has? You have blessed the work of his hands, so that his flocks and herds are spread throughout the land. [11] But stretch out your hand and strike everything he has, and he will surely curse you to your face."<P> JOB 1:12 The LORD said to Satan, "Very well, then, everything he has is in your hands, but on the man himself do not lay a finger."<BR> Then Satan went out from the presence of the LORD.<P><B>LK 22:31 "Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat. [32] But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers."</B><P>Hi ladies,<P>I have learned a lot today and am going to attempt to share with you, not only for your edification but to make sure I have it clarified in my own mind. It is exactly as you said Trapito, the fellowship I had with the Lord was a wonderful thing. I did see His hand in my life in so many ways. I have gone through so many trials by faith and watched how He used whatever came for the good. BUT! Apparently now, we are all realizing we have but scratched the surface in our relationship with Him and it has taken the disruption of our marriages for us to hear the wake up call.<P>First truth...We all know that satan has already lost the battle and the victory is the lord, but we also know that he roams the earth like a lion seeking his prey. What I realized today from these verses above is that satan can do nothing to us without asking the Father's permission. If he has to ask permission to mess with Job and Peter and we are all important in the father's eyes, then he has to ask to mess with us as well...I don't know about you but for me it was exciting to know this. I have always been aware that what is going on in my marriage was a spiritual battle, but I am thinking now it is even more important to me in that the Father is allowing this testing of my faith...gosh I knew this before too...how can I explain the difference I am feeling. It is like you shared before HW, that we are being challenged with this new task to really discover how to love with all our heart, mind and strength, how to seek Him first. <P>It is this log business, knowing that when we see the lord face to face, we will not be able to blame anyone but ourselves and how important it is to root out our own sin. We are all in agreement that the behaviors of our husbands are wrong, but what I think God is showing us is that sin is sin and we need to sweep out our own houses and get ready to meet Him Face to Face. The Jerry Bridges book I am reading seems to clear up some things for me in this. <P>From there comes a definition of the heart as it applies to scripture and in discussing the battle for holiness, especially in light of Romans 7 and the continuous struggle we have in wanting to do good and knowing that evil is right there with us. (v. 21) <P> <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Heart in scripture is used in various ways. Sometimes it means our reason or understanding, sometimes our affections and emotions, and sometimes our will. Generally it denotes the whole soul of man and all its faculties, not individually, but as they work together in doing good or evil. The mind as it reasons, discerns, and judges; the emotions as they like or dislike; the conscience as it determines and warns; and the will as it chooses or refuses--are all together called the heart. p.63-64<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Some of the verses discussing the heart:<BR>Jeremiah 17:9-10-The heart is deceitful above all things<BR> and beyond cure.<BR> Who can understand it?<P> JER 17:10 "I the LORD search the heart<BR> and examine the mind,<BR> to reward a man according to his conduct,<BR> according to what his deeds deserve."<P>1 Cor. 4:3-5-[3] I care very little if I am judged by you or by any human court; indeed, I do not even judge myself. [4] My conscience is clear, but that does not make me innocent. It is the Lord who judges me. [5] Therefore judge nothing before the appointed time; wait till the Lord comes. He will bring to light what is hidden in darkness and will expose the motives of men's hearts. At that time each will receive his praise from God.<P>James 1:22- Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. (This was especially interesting in reference to the heart being deceitful and as such "it excuses, rationalizes, and justifies our actions. It blinds us to the entire area of sin in our lives. It causes us to deal with sin using only halfway measures, or to think that mental assent to the Word of God is the same as obedience." (p.64)<P>Psalm 139:23-24-23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;<BR> test me and know my anxious thoughts.<P> PS 139:24 See if there is any offensive way in me,<BR> and lead me in the way everlasting.<P>Hebrews 4:12- HEB 4:12 For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.<P>Bridges really challenges us to let the Holy Spirit be the one searching our hearts lest we fall into one or both of two traps if we do the searching ourselves.<P>Trap one is morbid introspection, which can easily become a tool of satan, the accuser...in that one of his chief weapons is discouragement and he knows that if we become discouraged or dispirited (some of you sisters have mentioned feeling dispirited) we will not fight the battle for holiness.<P>Trap two is that of missing the real issues in our lives, our deceitful heart and satan leading us to focus on secondary issues....(hmmm...could that spell h-u-s-b-a-n-d). Only the Holy Spirit can enable us to see such areas to which we are blind.<P>The other two points he made in regards to the battle for holiness and indwelling sin is to recognize that indwelling sin works largely through our desires (our evil desires are constantly searching our temptations to satisfy their insatiable lusts-lusts cover a lot of territory-could be that hot fudge sundae that isn't on your diet agenda) and that it tends to deceive our understanding or reasoning. <BR> <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Deceit of the mind is carried on by degrees, little by little. We are first drawn away from watchfulness, then from obedience....p.67....We are drawn away from watchfulness by over-confidence p.68 (this is where I could relate to what you were saying Trapito, think I fell in this hole)...We are often drawn away from obedience by the abuse of grace...We abuse grace when, after sinning, we dwell on thecompassion and mercy of God to the exclusion of His holiness and hatred of sin....We are drawn away from obedience when we begin to wquestion what God says in His Word (Satan's first tactic with Eve)<P>2CO 7:1 Since we have these promises, dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God.<P>In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus taught that God's commandments were not only intended to regulate outward conduct, but the inner disposition as well. (i.e outer-do not kill...inner-do not hate) "Paul warns us against misguided and wrongly motivated attempts to control the body that leave our thought lives unrestrained" (p.118) in the following verse:<P>Col 2:20 Such regulations indeed have an appearance of wisdom, with their self-imposed worship, their false humility and their harsh treatment of the body, but they lack any value in restraining sensual indulgence.<P>Holiness begins in our minds and works out to our actions. <P>GAL 5:19 The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; [20] idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions [21] and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.<P><BR>"We must purify ourselves not only of the gross sins of the body, but also more "acceptable" sins of the spirit." (p. 121) Biblical examples would be Saul's jealousy and envy of David, the brother who remained home in the Prodigal Son parable, etc....Bridges contends then that our need to eradicate and place a boundary, so to speak, on these inner sins, in the goal of pursuing holiness, is imperative. Again, guarding the heart, as defined above, encompassing the mind as it reasons, discerns, and judges; the emotions as they like or dislike; the conscience as it determines and warns; and the will as it chooses or refuses, challenges us to take captive those thoughts that generate judgements and emotions which impairs our ability to reason, discern, take heed of our conscience warnings and to follow through in our will as God would, recognizing that even while confessing a sin, we might find ourselves again dwelling on the evil thoughts associated with that sin and we may be tempted again. (Ugh! guilty here!)<BR> <BR>2 Cor 10:5] We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. <P>"For as he thinks within himself, so he is" (Proverbs 23:7) Bridges identified some of the defilements of spirit and made suggestions in how to "cure" or address them. Exposing these dark things then challenges us to "do" something about them. <P>The cure for the sin of envy and jealousy is to find contentment in God. Asaph described this delemma in Psalm 73 and was not released from these sins until he realized the truth of such things:<P>PS 73:25 Whom have I in heaven but you?<BR> And earth has nothing I desire besides you.<P>letting go of all that is here to cling to what is better.<P>[quote]Bitterness arises in our hearts when we do not trust in the sovereign rule of God in our lives"... We become bitter against God or other people. Asaph was bitter against God because he felt God was not giving him a fair shake in life. (ps. 73:21) Job was bitter because he felt God was not recognizing his righteousness, and even came to the place where his attitude was described as, "It profits a man nothing when he is pleased with God" (Job 34:9)p. 122-123<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> <P>Even here on the forum, we have shared about how we try and try and feel like we are getting nowhere. On one hand, we want to be heard, to share our pain, etc. (and that is an important thing) but then do those of us listening, empathize with the pain and then challenge or exhort one another to remove the sin of bitterness. Kind of like Asaph's psalm, the process of identifying the bitterness and then comes the revelation of truth... Keep in mind that thoughts are flittering through as I try to absorb what God wants me to learn from this, trying to balance the what is and is not of things, particularly in relation to my marriage.<P>Bridges states that bitterness towards people is the result of or stems from an unforgiving spirit, being wronged and refusing to forgive...just thought of Jesus asking the Father to "forgive them as they know not what they do" and how I can apply that principle to my life and how satan invades my thoughts with "he knows exactly what he is doing" or "how can I forgive when he didn't ask for forgiveness or even acknowledged that he did anything wrong". <BR>and can feel my stomach hardening and tightening up. When I consciously loosen the stomach, taking the deep breath to remain open to His leading, I hear, "it doesn't matter what he did or didn't do, it matters what you do"...back to the when we meet face to face, I am responsible for my own sin before Him. Tears. Confession...Deep breath, be open...<P> <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Closely akin to bitterness is the spirit of retaliation. When we are wronged, the tendency is to retaliate, often in our minds in not in actions. (p.123)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Bridges states that the way we cleanse ourselves from this defiling spirit is to trust ourselves to Him who judges justly and who said, "It is mine to avenge, I will repay." Following Jesus's example as described in 1 Peter 2:23, we do not retaliate or make threats when insults are hurled at us. I can see God workng on me in this area as I note a different response when the verbal abuse occurs, the tears of hurt are more like, "Oh Lord, forgive him, he didn't mean it" but perhaps I have forgotten to add my own forgiveness in this process. Will have to pray about that more.<P>One of the most difficult defilements of spirit to deal with, according to Bridges, is the critical spirit, for it takes its roots in pride and we often find ourselves rubbing shoulders with the Pharisee in Luke 18:11, "quick to see-- and to speak of--the faults of others, but slow to see our own needs", and forgetting "one who spreads strife among brothers" by ctiticizing, is one of the "six things that the Lord hates". (Pro. 6:16-19)(p. 124) Kind of fits with Stormi's "You see how he is?"<P> <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR><BR>All of these attitudes -- envy, jealousy, bitterness, an unforgiving and retalitory spirit, and a critical and gossiping spirit defile us and keep us from being holy before God. They are just as evil as immorality, drunkenness and debauchery. Therefore we must work diligently at rooting out these sinful attitudes from our minds. Often we are not even aware our attitudes are sinful. We cloak these defiling thoughts under the guise of justice and righteous indignation. But we need to pray daily for humility and honesty to see these sinful attitudes for what they really are, and then for the grace and discipline to root them out of our minds and replace them with thoughts pleasing to God. p.124<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>The practical application part for me is to find a balance somehow...may word this funny as I try to think it though...Bridges mentioned how Joseph certainly had every right to feel bitter in light of what his brothers and his master's immoral wife did, but he responded by keeping sight of God's control in his life and being able to say to his brothers "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good.." (Gen. 50:20) What I realize is that I may be deluding myself, possibly back to that "sainthood" thing in Boundaries In Marriage...in that I deny my feelings, hurt, etc. in comparison to what you all are going through and that in that process, I may be burying the bitterness root through that denial. Satan's accusations about my selfishness for "feeling" is a lie. Only when we go through that process as Asaph did, identifiyng the bitterness, feeling it, verbalizing it, and finally resolving what was important, was he able to experience the release of the bitterness. <P><BR>So much to think about and have to stop now and mull this some more.<P>

As for Satan and his mimicking a roaring lion, this is from Neil T. Anderson's Daily Devotional for Aug 16. I've thought about it for a full week.<P><< N E I L A N D E R S O N D A I L Y D E V O T I O N A L<BR> from Freedom in Christ Ministries<P>August 16<P>SATAN'S DEFEAT<P>He [Christ] disarmed the rulers and authorities [and] made a<BR>public display of them, having triumphed over them through Him<BR>(Colossians 2:15).<P>In Colossians 2:15, Paul identifies something very important that<BR>happened at the death, resurrection and ascension of Christ. Not<BR>only were we made alive in Christ, but Satan was also disarmed<BR>and defeated. His defeat is not pending, nor is it future; it has<BR>already happened.<P>If Satan is already disarmed, why don't we experience more<BR>victory in our lives? In a word, the lie. Satan roams around like<BR>a hungry lion, looking and sounding ferocious. In reality his<BR>fangs have been removed and he has been declawed, but if he can<BR>deceive you into believing that he can chew you up and spit you<BR>out, he can control you, which is just what he wants to do. He is<BR>gumming Christians to death!<P>The very reason Christ conferred His authority on us was to<BR>demonstrate to the kingdom of darkness who is really in control<BR>in this world. In Ephesians Paul wrote that his call was "to<BR>bring to light what is the administration of the mystery which<BR>for ages has been hidden in God, who created all things; in order<BR>that the manifold wisdom of God might now be made known through<BR>the church to the rulers and authorities in the heavenly places.<BR>This was in accordance with the eternal purpose which He carries<BR>about in Christ Jesus our Lord" (Ephesians 3:9-11).<P>How are we doing at making Christ's victory known to "the rulers<BR>and authorities in heavenly places," which is God's eternal<BR>purpose? In many quarters, not very well. Some of us are still<BR>saying, "What rulers and authorities?" We're not sure that demons<BR>even exist. How are we ever going to get our job done in the<BR>world if we don't believe what God says about the kingdom of<BR>darkness? Others of us are cowering in the corner pleading, "O<BR>God, please help us! The devil is roaring at us!" And God<BR>responds, "I've done all I'm going to do. I defeated and disarmed<BR>Satan at the cross. I conferred all authority on you in Christ.<BR>Now open your eyes. Realize who you are and start demonstrating<BR>the authority you already possess."<P>In Your name, Lord, I will take an active stand against the devil<BR>and his demons, renouncing both apathy and fear.>><P>

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>He is gumming Christians to death!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>I love it Lor! Thanks for sharing this.

Wow, these posts are getting so good! I am enjoying reading these, catching up on what I've missed. SueB, your last post hit home for me, especially the part about the criticizing spirit. This is something the Lord has been revealing to me that I need to change. I felt especially convicted after reading the article I posted here about Surrendering All. Also I am realizing that criticism does no good in my marriage, and that I MUST renouce each critical thought of my husband, and especially NOT voice it. It all goes along with developing the meek, kind gentle spirit He intends me to have. Being king, loving, gentle, forgiving even when my H is neglectful and drinking keeps me on the right path. <P>I praise God each and every day for this forum, and the wisdom and knowledge shared here. You all have helped me so much. Thank you for sharing your thoughts here!<P>BTW, I haven't been on much lately because <B>my husband is home!</B> Hooray!! PTL!!<P>

This has been an excellent discussion on seeking God with all our heart. I have appreciated the honesty of those sharing their struggles to trust.<P>I have some thoughts I would like to share. The first is in regards to our need to understand the character of God. How can we trust someone we know nothing about. Our first steps must always be to seek to understand God as He reveals Himself in His Word. As we study the scriptures the Holy Spirit reveals Truth and that Truth begins to build in our understanding.<P>I would like to quote I Timothy 3:11-13, it has been a blessing to me when my faith waivered.<P>"It is a trustworthy statement: For if we died with Him, we shall also live with Him; If we endure, we shall also reign with Him; If we deny Him, He also will deny us; If we are faithless, He remains faithful; for He cannot deny Himself"<P>God remains ever faithful! He has broad shoulders and is able to continue to uphold and love us even in our struggles.<P>When we doubt God we need to tell Him that. He will do what it takes to change that doubt to confidence! He cannot deny Himself!<P>Lord, Thank You for revealing Yourself to us where we are. Whether we are new in the faith or have walked with You a long time. I ask for You to take each one of us the next step of faith that we may know You in a far deeper way then we do today. Help all of us to be faithful to study Your word and show ourselves to be approved, rightly dividing the Word of Truth. Forgive us when we doubt You and bring us quickly through doubt to faith. In Jesus Name.<P>Blessings, Taj<BR><P>------------------<BR>"Perfect love casts out fear" I John 4:18

Before my marital crisis, i've always thought that God was there for me, for helping me b/c in one way or another the things took their way without much of my effort.<BR>One day i began to ask to myself "How will God prove my faith?" and now i know that!!. <BR>SueB, what is going on with my marriage is also a spiritual battle!! It all began with my H becoming an unbeliever, and then all the doubts cross my mind!! I want/need be faithful to God and surrender totally to Him.

I just wanted to add my thanks to all of you guys for this wonderful thread.<P>I too have been hearing the same thing from God. He wants me to move to a higher plain of trust and faith IN HIM ALONE....not in my marriage, not in my H, not in my Plan A....IN HIM. All those other things are and will be important, but without faith in my God, none of it will work.<P>I am printing this thread so I can take it home, tuck it in my Bible and read it when I feel discouraged. Thanks everyone for sharing your truths about our gracious Father and Lord. <P>I will keep you all (and everyone at this board) in my prayers this weekend. <P>Mahalo!!!

My dear Mrs. O,<P>You don't know how thankful I am to hear you say this. I have read your posts in the prayer forum and really have been praying for you. People may be wishy washy, God is steadfast. WE don't know what God will do in each of our marriages, but we know His word is true and that He is faithful and He doesn't lie. It is up to us to seek His face and His will and grow as He instructs us, so that we learn to steadfast as He is steadfast. You can't see my tears but I have been fighting the good fight here for you. Hugs to you my sister!

Thanks, SueB! <P>I'm convinced it's the prayers on my behalf that are making the most difference....I feel so weak myself.<P>God bless you, sister!

With all my focusing on the smoke screen (troubles) in my life, I have just now read this thread. It is so awesome and God (the holy spirit) does seem to lead us all in the same direction. As I lay in bed crying and praying the other night (like David, my bed was wet with tears) I realized that what I wanted more than anything else was to feel God's love. I prayed for that one thing, no matter what other circumstances were in my life. And he answers our prayers. The prayers other's prayed for me was such an answer. So, I have been reflecting on what things get "in the way" between me and God. I want to have him with me always....like in the old testament when he walked with some men. I know that I have only begun to experience the presence of God and I long for more of that experience. I do listen to hear that "still small voice" and long for it. I also know that when I panic, fall into discouragement, focus on things that it is human to focus on, that all of these things get in the way. So, my question is "How do we get beyond these natural things that keep us from feeling God's presence." I know that part of it is in knowing God's word, his promises, and his nature. I have been seeking those things in his word. I also realize that the process may be similar to anything that we learn. I will use the analogy of sewing as that is my hobby. First I visualize the creation of something....(wanting to be more fully in the presence of God)....then I gather the materials (perhaps this is the part about studying God's word and his character).....then I begin to form the creation....(there are subtle nuances, but practicing gives you the ability to tug the fabric gently here to make the curve....the clipping of a curve to make it all lay right....the idea is that each time you go through the process you are better able to duplicate it the next time. So, I see myself further down the road than I once was....I know that when my emotions take over and the enemy is given ground, that I turn to God's word and run to the throne room. Oh, but the fact that I allow those emotions to get me into the state where the enemy can torment and try to destroy me. I feel guilty for the discouragement that I allow, but I am still struggling with how to prevent these things from creeping up on me. Somehow, I know that if I were able to constantly be in the presence of the Lord, that I would be safe from all of this. I suspect that others are struggling with this as well and perhaps we can seek the answer on how to keep from "going to the pit" at all. Perhaps we are learning just this as we fellowship together and pray for one another. Am I the only one who is struggling with the hindrance of my emotions in regards to really taking a hold of the promises God has given. I know that I know that God is a big God.....I have faith that God can do anything.....but, why is it that I despair, worry, mourn, weep, and sorrow and allow things to overwhelm me. I have had a lot to handle.....but that is an excuse because I also have seen and know that God works in people's lives. Any thoughts.......

Oneday,<BR>I think if you reread the posts you'll see indeed we are all struggling. We may not have all called it emotion, but I think they are the same things we struggle with. Sue specifically talked about struggling with emotions. <BR>But you are on the right road, seeking God with all your heart. That is what I think every struggle, trial, battle is really about. Learning how to seek Him. Trusting Him, getting to know Him through His word, because as Taj(I think) pointed out how can we trust someone we don't know. So we need to read His word and memorize it to call upon this living word in times of distress. <BR>In seeking God this week, God has put several thoughs together for me. I have memorized the scriptures that go with it, and when I go to that place (thinking of my circumstances, thinking it looks like my h is so in love with the ow that he will never come home) I cry out (real tears) and recall those scriptures. I am then able to go back to looking at God and then the circumstances don't seem to matter any more. <BR>For me it has been that I had to get to the end of myself to let go and really let God do it. I had to remember that God has allowed this trial, God uses all things for good. God wants me to forget about the circumstamces and seek Him daily, delving into His word, sasking questions about what He wants me to learn, praying throughout the day and praising always. I have for myself seen a big difference how I handle the circumstances and have actually felt pretty stable this week. Each day I have determined I would just seek Him and if my thoughts wander immediately remember the above. Another aspect that has helped me is I try to focus on God and the moment. If I'm not thinking about what has been, what could be, but instead thinking about how to seek God in a deeper way, then my thoughts remain on God.<BR>It is a struggle and what I have shared may not be of help to you, But God's help is. Ask Him how He wants you to seek Him. He is more than willing and waiting to help you. He will show you through the scriptures you read, devotionals that come your way or perhaps from someone's words on this forum. Another thing I notice is that when God is telling me something, usually several things I read say the same thing. So sometimes I look for patterns. <BR>Cry out to your Father, God and seek Him. Many have shared the way they are seeking God at this point. Share with us what you learn about seeking God.<BR>I think another item that has come through is that we all from time to time think we have been seeking Him only to learn God is ready for us to seek Him at yeat another, deeper level. God is so awesome.<BR>Lord,<BR>I lift oneday up to you and all of us on the forum. Lord YOu have truly shown us more of You through each other and these posts. Lord I pray that You come through loud and clear to us all. As we ask, "Are we really seeking You with all our hearts, minds, and strength. Lord, we can never exhaust that question because You always have something new to show us. Lord how amazing. Lord, instruct us, cause us to thirst for yet, mote of You. Not for any other purpose, but to know our God better. In Jesus name, Amne.<P>My goal is God Himself, not joy or peace,<BR>Nor even blessing but Himself, my God.<BR>Tis His to lead me there, not mine, but His,<BR>At any cost, dear Lord, by any road.<P>Have a great weekend seeking our Lord.<P>

1John 4:18-19 says "There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fears, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.<BR>We love because He first loved us."<P>Why might beginning to understand the love of God enable 1 John 4:18 to be experienced in your life?<P>To answer this you might find looking up the following verses helpful. In looking at these verses ask, what are some ways God expresses love to His children? Then answer the question above and the ones to follow.<P>Psalm 68:19<BR>Romans 5:5<BR>Ephesians 1:3<BR>Colossians 1:12-14<BR>Titus 2:4<P><BR>Name one result of God's coming to live inside you?<P>As wives and mothers we are to?<P>What changes have progressively taken place in your life since God placed His love in your heart?<P>Here are some verses that will help you know more about the love of God.<P>Psalm 106:1<BR>Jeremiah 31:3<BR>Romans 5:8<BR>Romans 8:35-39<BR>1 Corinthians 13:4-6<BR>Ephesians 3:19<BR>John 3:16<BR>1 John 4:9-10<BR>Revelation 1:5<P>What kind of love is God's love?<BR>Do you know anyone besides Jesus who truly loves you unconditionally?<BR>Do you know anyone who would die for you besides Jesus? <BR>This will help you to think through knowing that God is love. Next we will look at "God is Supreme and Sovereign"<P>

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Oh, but the fact that I allow those emotions to get me into the state where the enemy can torment and try to destroy me. I feel guilty for the discouragement that I allow, but I am still struggling with how to prevent these things from creeping up on me.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>The battles we have are something huh? You battle to not have your emotions control your mind and actions and I battle with admitting that I even have any emotions! Sigh. <P>My husband probably more accurately struggles as you do. My husband says his favorite verse in the bible is JN 11:35 Jesus wept. He says this provides him with comfort knowing that Our Lord was so filled with feeling and compassion. In my battle, I have had to look at those same type of verses to see that even Jesus experienced feelings to give myself permission to have them. <P>I do know I ask myself a lot about what the truth is about stuff going on around me. Like what is the truth about the kind of demands your husband is making, the ultamatums if indeed you are carrying another child, what does God promise and what is the truth about who has been more faithful over the years. Where do you feel the safest? In your husband's arms or in the Lord's? Who has your best interests at heart? When I ask myself these questions, I can then discern whether it is from the evil one or the Holy Spirit and I can rebuke evil with truth.<P>I am gonna keep praying for both of us Oneday.

I got this in my email today, I especially like the last line, it helps summarize what we are all saying:<P>A true story by Josh and Karen Zarandona<P>Brenda was a young woman who was invited to go rock climbing. Although she was scared to death, she went with her group to a tremendous granite cliff. In spite of her fear, she put on the gear, took a hold on the rope, and started up the face of<BR>that rock.<P>Well, she got to a ledge where she could take a breather. As she was hanging on there, the safety rope snapped against Brenda's eye and knocked out her contact lens.<P>There she is on a rock ledge, with hundreds of feet below her and hundreds of feet above her. Of course, she looked and looked and looked, hoping it had landed on the ledge,<BR>but it just wasn't there.<P>There she was, far from home, her sight blurry. She was desperate and began to get upset. So she prayed to the Lord to help her to find it.<P>When she got to the top, a friend examined her eye and clothing for the lens, but there was no contact lens to be found. She sat down, despondent, with the rest of the party, waiting for the rest of them to make it up the face of the cliff. She looked out across range after range of mountains, thinking of that Bible verse that says,<BR>"The eyes of the Lord run to and from throughout the whole earth." She thought, "Lord, You can see all these mountains. You know every stone and leaf. You know exactly where my contact lens is. Please help me.<P>Finally, they walked down the trail to the bottom. At the bottom there was a new party of climbers just starting up the face of the mountain. One called out, "Hey, you guys! Anybody lose a contact lens?" Well, that<BR>would be startling enough, but you know why the climber saw it? An ant was moving slowly across the face of the rock, carrying it.<BR> <BR>Brenda told me that her father is a cartoonist. When she told him the incredible story of the ant, the prayer, and the contact lens, he drew a picture of an ant lugging that contact lens with the words, "Lord, don't know why you want me to carry this thing. I can't eat it, and it's awfully heavy. But if this is what You want me to do, I'll carry it for You."<BR> <BR>I think it would probably do some of us good to occasionally say, "God, I don't know why you want me to carry this load. I can see no good in it and it's awfully heavy.<BR>But, if you want me to carry it, I will." God doesn't call the qualified. He qualifies the called.

I love it!! I would love to send it to my friend if that's okay. Any copyrights?

Karenna, I have no idea about copyrights, I "just" got it in an email, I don't personally know the people named in the story. I thought a lot of us are striving to be that ant.

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>I thought a lot of us are striving to be that ant.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Hey wait a minute! I thought we were supposed to get rid of our burdens!

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Bridges states that bitterness towards people is the result of or stems from an unforgiving spirit, being wronged and refusing to forgive...just thought of Jesus<BR>asking the Father to "forgive them as they know not what they do" and how I can apply that principle to my life and how satan invades my thoughts with "he knows exactly what he is doing" or "how can I forgive when he didn't ask for forgiveness or even acknowledged that he did anything wrong". and can feel my stomach hardening and ightening up. When I consciously loosen the stomach, taking the deep breath to remain open to His leading, I hear, "it doesn't matter what he did or didn't do, it matters what you do"...back to the when we meet face to face, I am responsible for my own sin before Him.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Hi Ladies,<BR>Just got back from meeting with Pastor and I discovered the above issue hadn't resolved. The bitterness stuff seemed to extend heavenward more than I realized, the long arm allowing these challenges and the sifting process, stretching me to love beyond capacity in His strength, to continually check myself, my accountability and to endure the actions of my husband with the heart of God, has been weighing heavily on me and I guess, in some ways, I was mad at God for the challenge, angry that this marriage in which I desired as a godly union to further the work of the kingdom, has been more chaotic and dysfunctional than any of the unyoked marriages I was in. Satan, you are one nasty dude! So, in the spirit of James 5:16 "Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective," I confess this to you my sisters and ask that you pray for me and hold me accountable. <P>Father, you have shown me how to have compassion on my husband in his ignorance, to have a bleeding heart for his growth/lack of growth in you, to claim your promises for the reconcilliation of our hearts and now you have shown me my own rebelliousness and anger for having to go through this at all. Father forgive my arrogance, remove this bitterness root from my heart. Cleanse me whiter than snow and prepare me to gladly receive the challenges you allow to come my way, that I might remove the chaff from my life and that you might be glorified. IJN, Amen.

Lonesome heart,<BR>I see the ant's burden more metaphorically as the path God wants us to follow, whether that means being Mother Theresa caring for the poor & sick or being Christ as we take care of our kids & go about our jobs.<P>We also find ourselves in life situations which we have little control over--kids asserting independence, ill & aging parents, spouses leaving marriages...those things can be considered a burden and yes we give the worry and the outcome to God, but we still live with the daily occurances (burden).<P>Anyway, that's part of what that story meant to me.

I really liked the ant story. I'm really struggling with the burden issue myself right now. I've been trying to sort out what my burdens are (and aren't) and simplify my life. It's not easy. I visualize myself laying down my burdens at Jesus' feet and asking for help. I couldn't feel any burdens lifting. Three days I was down in the dumps and feeling sorry for myself, feeling that my prayers aren't being answered. I felt deeply immersed in a thick fog. The fog seems to be lifting now and I can see my follies more clearly. <P>Keep praying for me ladies. I'm still lost and fumbling about. I really appreciate everyone's participation in this thread.