I am 30 years old, married for 6 years with four sons. My problem is that I have no prayer life. I find it very hard to pray, especially for myself. I know this henders my relationship with God, but I don't know how to overcome this stronghold in my life. Just to give you some background about me: I experienced sexual abuse as a pre-teen, I experienced physical abuse in my second year of marriage. At times I have felt so broken that I feel even God can't fix me, though I know this is not true because I know the word of God, it is still hard for me to pray. I find it easier to write my prayers in a journal, but I am not consistant with writing in my journal. Please pray for me to have victory over this matter. I want to have a praying spirit and a closer more intimate relationship with Jesus Christ my Saviour.<P>------------------<BR>QueenB

QueenB, I will keep you in my prayers, asking the Lord to show You how He wants you to pray, and to work it out for you to have time by yourself to pray. He knows your heart QB and I am sure He is already working on a miracle for you.<P>God bless you, and just keep asking Him to show you how He wants you to pray. <P>Do you feel that you are being oppressed by the enemy? On the days that I feel Satan is after me, I get out the book by Neil T. Anderson "The Bondage Breaker". This is a GREAT book, and might be helpful to you, especially going through the Steps to Freedom in Christ. I have found so many great prayers in it, and have felt His presence while I read it. <BR>

QueenB,<P>I call my journal prayers, "Paper Prayers". I do not see those written prayers as any different then praying silently, or praying audibly. Don't let the devil con you into thinking you are not praying. Even an arrow prayer shot up to the heavens in a sigh is received as holy incense by God.<P>Set aside just a few minutes every day before you even put your feet on the floor and give your day to God. Then whenever you you have a meal say words of thanks to God for His provision. When you see something beautiful lift your thoughts in praise to God.<P>Prayer is just taking every opportunity to converse with the Lord. The Holy Spirit also promises to teach you how to pray....just ask.<P>Father, help this sister to begin to talk with you every chance she gets. Remind her often through her day that You are there ready to converse with her. Teach her to pray Holy Spirit as You have promised. IJN<P>Try just reciting the Lord's Prayer for awhile there is an awful lot in there to contemplate and focus on.<P>Blessings,Taj

QueenBESB,<BR>I know from experience that the inertia to change behavior is difficult even when you really want to. Take a few minutes and cry out to God, how much you want to change but that you can't alone. He will hear you. Ask Him forgiveness for being away for a while. Then ask Him to change you, to work in you to will and to act according to His purposs for your life. Then when you come to Him, He will come to you.<P>Several years ago my prayer life was like yours. He took all distractions away from me. I had just moved some place new and didn't know anyone yet, and my h worked 7 days a week. I got into a Bible study and was studying James. I kept waiting for God to come to me. Truth was He was waiting just where I left Him, waiting for me to come and see Him. <P>The morning I read James 4:8, I felt like God had just hit me over the head with a 2x4. Then I began this journey of seeking Him. My journey has waxwd and waned during the last 7 years, but since Jan He has really been showing me how to seek Him with all my heart. <P>I think that at the bottom of many of our trials, God's purpose is to help us to get to the end of ourselves so we are forced to seek Him. He is waiting for us to come to Him. He is waiting right where we left Him. He wants your heart and He wants to be the center of your greatest desire. He loves you. He will bring you closer to Him when you begin to seek Him. And how do you seek Him? Pray.<P>When I began to desire to pray I would write on 3x5 cards the words PRAY and put them on the bathroom mirror, on the refrigerator door, on the door going out of my house, etc. I then put one right by my bed on top of the alarm. It said, "Say good morning to Your Lord, and pray." It took a few days but then I didn't need the signs to remind me. I usually pray when I am walking places or on the subway, and the car when I drive it. <P>Start to pick places and times when you have quiet moments to pray. I find I pray throughout the day, not always for long stretches of time. The more you do it the more it will become apart of the way you do things naturally. <P>God will honor your efforts and then make changes in you and move you to where He wants you to be. The effort is worth it. Communication with Jesus is so comforting. He will fill all those spaces within that you can't. He wants to. Have a cup of coffee and sit down and bow your head and have a chat with God, right after you read this thread.<BR>God Bless.<P>Father,<BR>I lift up Queen to You. Lord, touch her heart to seek You. She needs Your help to get her started. Lord she loves You and wants to seek a closer relationship with You. Teach her to pray. In Jesus name, Amen.

[Thank you for your response and your prayers. In this area I do feel opressed by the enemy, like he does not want me to talk to God. I will look into getting that book, I love to read and hopefully it will encourage me as it has you.<P>------------------<BR>QueenB

Thank you for your response and your prayer, it gave me great comfort that someone would reply and even type a prayer for me. I will do as you suggested and use the Lord's prayer, after all it is the model prayer for all belivers, and it certainly is a start for me. Blessings to you also.<P>------------------<BR>QueenB

Thank you for your reply and your prayer. I will try your suggestion about the 3x5 cards. I can also pray when I am breast feeding my son, that takes about 30 minutes and I usually just watch tv or read why not pray! <BR>P.S. I have never had coffee, but I will subsitiut hot coco :-)<P>------------------<BR>QueenB

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