I want to end it. I don't know what else to do. I am numb right now. God I am so scared right now. Tears won't stop. Please help

TerriT<p>I'm here and I'm praying. I really don't know your story and wonder if you are TerriTZ? I suspect you are, and I don't know your whole story either. I don't read as much as I used to here.<p>Please don't do anything rash. Contact someone in the non cyber world. Feeling this kind of desperation is not from God, it's the enemy attacking you. Pray honey and get your bible out. Say the 23 rd Psalm. <p>This part of the site is pretty slow. Talk to us and post on GQII too. <p>Please respond and let us know you are alright? Nothing is worth ending it all. I assume you mean "ending you?"<p>Waiting to hear from you. <p>We do care. God cares and you aren't alone.<p>Samantha

TerriT,<p>If you are still online, please let us know. <p>I am praying for you, and would like to suggest some places for you to call and reach out. Can you tell me what State or City you are in? <p>Please don't do anything to harm yourself!!<p>Praying for you,
Boaz

I am in Lima, Ohio I am so alone right now I am at my store right now. In my ofice can't belive the way I am feeling right now. wish there was soomeone I could call to be ight here wish it was my husband he has no idea. when i left he house i just heald my daughter and told her how much i love her. You wouldd think after all we have beeen through that this.....tonight would be a piece of cake its not. I ccan't elp it jsut can cope

Hi Terri,<p>I am the moderator for this forum, and am also a member here at Marriage Builders. I have been in your shoes, as so many of us have been.<p>Are you alone in the store? Are there people around? Is there ANYONE AT ALL that you can trust to share your despair? How about your doctor, or your daughters pediatrician? Is there ANYONE you can call? Please reach out, FOR YOUR DAUGHTER, and FOR YOURSELF.<p>I am praying for you right now.

Heavenly Father,<p>I ask Lord that you hold Terri in your massive and strong hands tonight!!! She is your child, hurting deeply right now, and Lord we ALL understand the pain, and want to help, but do not know how!!<p>Lord, you know what needs to be done. PLEASE DO IT. Let Terri know that she is precious, and that her salvation is in You.<p>Give her peace, and a sense of belonging tonight. Let her know that she is a MOTHER who's daughter needs her...<p>In Jesus' Name, AMEN!<p>Dear Terri,<p>I take this VERY SERIOUSLY as I have a son who tried to kill himself when he was eight years old. I never take threats of suicide lightly! PRAISE GOD, my son did not die, and is now a seventeen year old young man who is a BEAUTIFUL and DEAR person. He is loved!!<p>Terri, you have WORTH in this world! Please remember that!!<p>I kept a crisis phone number in my home when my son was in danger, and then later, when my daughter spoke of the same thing (they were both sexually abused by a family friend)... I know of this fear first hand...<p>Also, my ex-H had many affairs, and I also wanted to die. But I found HELP, and you NEED to find HELP too. Is there anyone at all that you can reach out to???<p>Please don't give up!!<p>Jesus, please hold this woman tightly!!!!!

I just got off the phone with cali - i am so glad you guys are here. The ears won't stop I just get away from it now. I hear what everybody is saying wht don't it go away this is not me........................I am so scared..........

Ther ei sno one here the store is closed at5:00

Terri,<p> I have not had the pleasure of talking to you before, but I was so heartbroken by your message, even though short and not very detailed, I felt the least I could do was try to help. Almost 2 years ago I felt the exact same way and someone (that very day that I was going to) took one look in my eyes and felt that he needed to help me. I got that feeling when reading you're message. I to this day tear up just looking at him because I was so grateful that he made me realize what I almost through away.<p> I don't know your story, I don't know what is so hard in your life. I can't say I know exactly how you feel, only you know that, but I can promise you that all those feelings of negativity, all the overwhelming hopelessness, the pain, the confusion, the feeling of being lost... it's not worth your life. Your life is a gift that you received, and nothing is worth taking that away from yourself. Don't deprive yourself from the chance to have so much more then what you're feeling now. There is always some hope in every situation even if you can't see it. You have to try and look harder.<p> I remember feeling like I didn't matter to anyone, like I wasn't worth the air I breathed. I felt like I didn't matter at all, but think of it this way. You're important enough for a perfect stranger to care, and want to help. That's how much your life means. There is always someone who cares, who wants to help. You just might not know it yet.<p> Right now you're in the hardest part of these feelings, once you get through them there are only better things after. I haven't been as happy as I am today, in almost 3 years. I never thought I would say that I am so glad I got another chance. <p> Please please, I know you still have that hope in you because you said you didn't want to end it, and that you are afraid. That's exactly how I felt, just please try to trust and believe me, that if you can just be strong enough to get past these feelings you will only be stronger after, and I promise, so much happier. It's not worth it! Just give this a chance. After every struggle there is peace. A smile always conquers the feelings of a tear. Live just to feel all the more smiles that you are meant to have. There is hope, I swear.<p> Please don't be afraid to write me back, ask or tell me anything you want. I am here anytime. I made this effort because I want to. Please have faith! <p>Love, Sabrina <p>p.s. I registered at the site, but I haven't gotten my password back yet. So, I am posting this under my mom's name.<p>[ December 10, 2001: Message edited by: A blessed Samantha ]</p>

I am sorry! Thanks for your prayers. I just don't know I feel so empty. I am succh a successful business women have done so much BUT GOD I an't I can't get my self out of this. Being here...........it it making it worse???????? wht do I feel llike this so bad

TerriT,<p>I don't know you, or your story, all I know is that you have a beautifull daughter who needs and will always need her mother. <p>I know the pain is crushing, I know there does not seem to be much hope, but there is, it lies in that hug you gave your daughter, the feel of those arms wrapped around you as you left. Do not forget that, hold on to it for all it's worth.<p>She needs you, don't let her down. <p>Reach out to someone. <p>Is there something specific that happend today that you can tell us about? <p>We are here...lean on us now.

She called me...I urged her to get help in her area...to tell them she was in crisis and needed help today!<p>All we can do is pray that she does...I told her there was little more that we could do for her here...she needs to get 'real' person help...<p>She asked how I got stronger...I told her my path...maybe if some of you share how you go on each day...how you plowed through the pain, she will find something on which to grab...

You can Terri...YOU CAN...<p>We just brought my sister home from the hospital after Thanksgiving...her H decided 'he didn't want to be married.' She threatened to take her life...<p>She is now taking the steps...Take the steps Terri...get stronger for YOU...once you get stronger you will be able to deal with a whole lot more...but you have to focus on YOU getting better and feeling better.<p>Please consider what we discussed on the phone...CALL a live body...a pastor...a hotline in your area...someone trained to help...please.

THANK YOU CALI THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I dread tomorrow

It is scary asking for help. It is scary to feel out of control...but that's why the people are there...to help...to help you find that control...YOU CAN<p>I have to sign off now Terri...my workday starts early out here...and I have small children to round up in the morning...<p>Please post or email to me regarding your progress.
Cali<p>[ December 10, 2001: Message edited by: Cali ]</p>

Terri<p>Are you still there/here? I am praying still and your in my thoughts big time. I wish you'd reach out to someone that you can physically talk to or touch. You need that, God provides people in our life for that very reason.<p>Can you tell us a bit of what is happening at the moment. What has brought your level of despair to this point?<p>Did you read what my daughter posted to you? She did that all on her own. She came in the house and I told her what was happening. She said "Can I e-mail her?" I had to tell her that I don't have your e-mail address or know your story very well. I said all I can do is post. My wonderful daughter said "Can I post to her?" I said sure. She even registered and everything. The password didn't show up after about a half an hour so she posted under my identity. What she said though is so very insightful. <p>You have your own daughter and she needs you. No matter what you need to pull yourself together. I thought many thoughts very similar to yours. I couldn't go through with that though, because I couldn't do that to my daughter. Leave her that legacy? No way. She would be forever scared and hurt by it. I just couldn't do it.<p>Have you ever been close to someone who has committed suicide? Well I have, one a very close and beloved friend and one my boss' wife. Let me tell you how devastating it is to everyone. People you don't even know are effected so negatively by it. It spreads pain and confusion just like a cancer. Rapidly hurting everything in it's path. <p>Please call someone, don't do this to anyone you love or know. <p>Dear Jesus, my Lord,<p>Please keep a hedge of protection around Terri this evening. Don't allow her human self to destroy herself. Lift up her spirit unto you dear Lord. Wrap Your loving arms around her and let her know she is not alone and that this wonderful gift of life is not to be thrown away because of the evil that lurks on this earth. That only You Lord give life and bring us home to You in your time. Clear her mind of all the confusion and strife. Let her see how valuable she is and that there is hope.<p>Give her the knowledge to know her marriage can be healed. Give her the wisdom to see through the pain that is crippling her at the moment.<p>Please Lord take special extra care of your child Terri tonight and through out the hours and days to follow until she gets past this crisis.<p>In Jesus name I pray,
Amen<p>Terri<p>I have tears in my eyes right now. My heart is breaking for you. You have us all so worried. Please, please contact someone. <p>If you'd like to write to me, you can at Samantha7x70@aol.com<p>[ December 10, 2001: Message edited by: A blessed Samantha ]</p>

Terri<p>Are you Okay?<p>I just want you to know that WE CARE! <p>We will pray WITH you! What do you want to pray for? What is in your heart right now?<p>Lord God, Heavenly Father, I pray right now that you will help this dear dear woman. Lord, please send your Holy Spirit to her to comfort her, and rock her like your little child who has been hurt soooo badly. Lord, she needs you, right now. <p>Father, I pray that Terri will let us know how we can help, and Father, I pray the Holy Spirit will bring forth fruit in each one of us, so that we can help this child of yours.<p>In Jesus name, the name that is above ALL other names.<p>Amen

Thank you I am here but it don't feel like me I am so tired. I am so embarrresed why?? i hear all of you thank ou

Thank you Lord! I am so glad she is there<p>Terri, do you have msn or aol chat? Do you know how to do it? If not - I'll just keep hitting my "refresh" key<p>I read a little bit about your story<p>I understand<p>Terri, I'm praying for you<p>Lord, please be with this poor lady, and help her Lord <p>Protect her Lord<p>In Jesus Holy Name

I have been married 15 eas dec 27th last yea on ou 14th just 4 months after the affair we redid our wedding vows. why did't it get better it sure seemed like he was remorsefl. So loving at first he thought it was over in my mind I thought i could forgive I thought I didi but he makes it come back I wish I could explain it . But I bet you all know. Is it so nice to talk to someone that knows. Why don't he?