I had to go to court yesterday because his girlfriend says I called her work and said whore and hung up. I didn't do it but the judge ruled in her favor. I got to watch my H, the OW and her H high 5 each other and hoop and hollar. I got 60 days in jail, which made him smile, but they reduced it to 1 year probation. Which made him put his head in his hands and shake it slowly. Just a awrning. Don't call the OW. I did call her once and did call her H once, but always talked to them. What a cruel world. You tell the truth and this is what happen to you. To think that my H takes no blame in all of this just rips me apart. I didn't know this OW until I found out about her. I have never even had a speeding ticket and now I have a criminal record because of her and my H. My heart can't break anymore

WOW that SUX! I am sorry for your pain, but i truly believe what comes around goes around and they eventually will get what's coming to them! So your H and the OW's H are friends now? I don't understand that part.

Mental:<P>If you didn't do it, how on earth did they find you guilty???<P>If it's worth your trouble, appeal the decision to the next highest court.

{{{{{{{{{{<B>MENTAL</B>}}}}}}}}}}<P>It is so unfair...<P>Is it really true that the three H... OW... and H of OW... basically ganged up against you?<P>Unfair, unjust, immoral... <P>My prayers are for your healing right now... <P>Jim

MENTAL, I’m certainly not doubting your word, but there’s GOT to be more to it than that. I can’t see any judge ruling that way just based on one person’s word against another, since Guilt has to be PROVEN in cases like this. Besides... unless there’s a restraining order or something, you could call her up and say whatever you want... it’s called the First Amendment. And for criminal charges to be filed... well, there’s just got to be more to it, a little background.<P>If there isn’t anything more than that, I’d suggest suing the snot out of your H, the OW, AND the judge.<BR><P>------------------<BR>Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die

No, there isn't anymore to it really. After I got the cell phone bills, I called the numbers on them.(Nov 98) Of course she answered and I asked who she was and told her who I was. Then approx. 3 weeks later I rec'd a call from the police saying she filed a report against me and to not make contact with her again. I listened, but in March my H told me she was bothering him at work and that OW wanted to get together for a b-day drink. I was mad. He asked me if I would call her and ask her to leave him alone because she wasn't listening. He dialed, I talked. I was arrested for that in May, 1999. The charges were dismissed but refiled for a Nov 98 call and that is what I went to court over. Supposedly they do not have to prove beyond a reasonable doubt because of the kind of case it is. Her word against mine. Since I told the truth that I called her on Nov. 6th them the judge just figured that I probably did it again. But yes, they all did have a good laugh at me. I now have a criminal record and I will live with it every day.

Unless there is an actual restraining order filed by the court, all the police reports in the world cannot prevent you from making as many calls as you want. I’d appeal and then sue the snot out of all of them myself... including the judge. Might be a bit of a LoveBuster, but it looks like your H tricked you into making the call anyway.<P>------------------<BR>Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die

Oh ....... I feel so bad for what you've gone through....<P>I have experienced this so called justice system we have and it is not pretty!!! I haven't seen "fair" in there anywhere either yet!!!<P>I'm so sorry and I would encourage you to try something like what "Whodat" suggests.....I know that time and money and a good lawyer are not easy to come by - but if possible it's certainly worth it!!!! <P>HUGS and Prayers,<P>Sheba<P>PS - I just can't bring myself to call you "mental" ..... Perhaps just M - OK?

I too have been through the criminal 'Justice' system. That's another story, but I can SURE sympathize with you. I'm glad you never had to go 'inside'.<BR>I'm with the others here. Stand up for your self and put your worries about 'lovebusting' completely aside. Sue the *&%^%* out of those (*^^%(%. Ohh, I'm so angry! You should probably not take my advice as I am so freaked out right now (remembering my own experiences too) that I am not thinking clearly. In my case, my ex (not Dylan) put on a massive show of tears and sobbing for the prosecuter then snickered at me when no-one was paying attention. My defense attorney suggested I plead guilty. I didn't - refused to... the injustice would have been too much to bear... it was the last straw... Don't lose your head, don't let them get away with this... don't take my advice (exept about not losing your head, of course)<BR>talk to your lawyer.<BR>Deut

Mental: This is so unbelievable! It is so sickening how the victims become the guilty! I say...find a lawyer and sue their pants off! What happenned to you just doesn't sound right or fair. Good luck!

I would love to sue the pants off of them. Just watching them gloat made me sick. There is now a restraining order, but there was not before. My lawyer never said anything about one or the lack of one so I guess there doesn't need to be one. I don't know about anything anymore. Everything seems to be going right for H and OW. Now comes the custody battle. How can him or the OW sleep at night, I will never know.

I would love to sue the pants off of them. Just watching them gloat made me sick. There is now a restraining order, but there was not before. My lawyer never said anything about one or the lack of one so I guess there doesn't need to be one. I don't know about anything anymore. Everything seems to be going right for H and OW. Now comes the custody battle. How can him or the OW sleep at night, I will never know.

Hi M -<P>Do you feel that your lawyer did the best job for you?<P>Perhaps you should go for a couple of consults with other lawyers and get their take on the situation....<P>This is important stuff and you shouldn't settle for unfairness!!!<P>HUGs,<P>Sheba

Mental - Did you have a lawyer to represent you? Sounds like you didn't or at least not a very good one (= court-appointed?) If so, I'd file an appeal to at least get your criminal record expunged (or whatever they call it). You have been screwed over royally by the legal system. Also think you should leave that world-class jerk aka your H for his behavior. From the way he acted in court, sounds like he's in cahoots with OW and her H (strange!) and I'll bet that his story about not wanting her to bother him and having you call her, was just to make you BELIEVE they're not seeing each other, and to set you up to be a scapegoat for his affair.<P>Regards and blessings,<P>--Wex

Mental: I agree with the rest. Consult the advice of a few lawyers. See how they can help you get this off your record and out of this mess. How this happenned to you, sounds fishy to me. It sounds like you were set up.<P>Remember....what comes around, goes around. Just because your H & OW are doing well now, doesn't mean that they will be doing fine later. Sooner or later, their time will comes to pay the piper.<P>Now that you found out how yucky your H can be....do you still want him?