Jack,<BR>Those poor little girls! Thank God they have you!!!<P>I can honestly say after reading all of this that Gina has not grown up. And the fact that she agreed to let you try for adoption or custody just proves that right now she is only thinking about herself.<P>Even if things can't work out between you and her, you do what you feel you need to to give those girls all the happiness they deserve. I wish you nothing but luck.<P>Prayers to you and the girls,<BR>Mitzi

Mitzi<P>Thanks for the reply and the kind words. I talked to Gina this morning and she said again that she thought this would be best for the girls. But, she has not talked with the OP she going to marry on the 19th. She told me that he is going to be mad and not take this well, but she is going to stand by her descision that the girls would be better off if I stay in their life. As she said, he dosen't even know that they have been seeing me. I'm going to pray that in the morning she has not let him change her mind. <P>Thanks<BR>Jack<BR>Walking on thin ice

Hi everyone,<P>Talked to Gina tonight, she said she has not changed her mind on the girls, but wants to get together this weekend & talk about it. I don't believe she has told the OP what is really going on yet. I am just holding my breath, feel like I'm on thin ice & its cracking. <P>On a good note, all the girls were here tonight for awhile & we had a great time.<P>Thanks all for being here<BR>Prayers for all<BR>Jack

Jack,<BR>It's good that she wants to talk. Just be sure not to be too demanding. Plan A all the way. Keep on her good side so that she doesn't change her mind. Think of what the outcome will be if you get the girls!!<P>Enjoy them as much as you can. Make every moment with them special. I hope things turn out good for you!<P>Take care,<BR>Mitzi

p.s. How's Abby's ear doing?? <P>Mitzi

Hi Mitzi,<P>Abby is doing great, isn't wonderful what the right medicine will do. Thanks for asking, it was very nice of you.<P>Believe me I am not demanding anything, just asking & begging. Gina called at 6:10 & told me to send the girls across the street to her Mom's, I told her that they had just sat down to eat dinner...She was mad, told me not to make them dinner again without asking her first, "Jack how do do know I didn't make them dinner or have something else planned for tonight". I told her I was soory & that I would never do agian without asking her first. Sara sat there & listen, then got up & gave me a hug and said she was sorry that mom got mad at me because they were hungry, I told Sara that it was alright, your mother was right I should have checked with her first. <P>I'm hanging in, but it is getting harder & harder...the girls deserve better.<P>Thanks Mitzi, prayers for you<BR>Jack<p>[This message has been edited by Jackh (edited March 01, 2000).]

Jack,<BR>Glad to hear about Abby. My 7 year old gets ear infections all the time. Not fun either. He's had tubes in both ears and they both came out. Now his right ear is full of fluid again. He may have to get the tube put back in that one. The big problem is, his hearing is bad as long as the fluid is there. I feel like I'm yelling at him all the time! <P>Ok, try not to beg either. If you want to talk to her about how you feel, just state it. <P>About the dinner thing. That irks me. I know how hungry kids get when they've been in school all day. Maybe instead of a meal, just have a snack for them, like maybe some peanut butter crackers, or some fruit or do like my kids, eat a bowl of cereal. Especially if they are going to be eating dinner late in the evening. Just a little something to hold them until they get their dinner. <P>Just try not to do anything to upset her. It's hard I know, but hey, you can always vent here later! <P>Take care,<BR>Mitzi

Jack,<P>Welcome to MB forum. Be sure to read Jim's Welcome site under Just Found Out. It is a real help. When you post, be sure to give people time to reply, there are a lot of us in crisis out here, and sometimes, its hard to get to all the threads. Also by reading other's stories, and posting to them, you will get more replies back. <P>I am not in the same boat, but I have 3 girls, and my H left me on Xmas day. Moved in with the OW a week later, and is already coming after me for divorce. If you look up threads by name, you can read my story.<P>The pain you are feeling right now is normal. It is like experiencing death. I feel its worse than death. The best thing you can do is Plan A and familiarize yourself with the program. <P>I will reply more to you a little later, I have to get to work. Hang in there, and prayers are with you. Dana<BR>

Oh Jackh, <P>What a complicated story! This has entirely too much deception to be a stable situation, something will blow soon. Those little girls are not going to be able to stay silent. Be as good to yourself and to them as you can be. Try your best to Plan A.<P>I'm a bit confused, your girlfriend is planning to marry this guy before she knows who the father is? Sorry, if this is the case it does not sound like responsible or honorable behavior to me. <P>A lot of us will be thinking about you.

Hi all,<P>Mitzi,<BR>You are right & thinks, I stopped this morning on the way to work & got some decent snacks for the girls, they were just as happy with them tonight as they were if I had made dinner.<P>Dana,<BR>Thank you for the kind words and advice, I can use all I can get right now.<P>Hanora,<BR>Complicated Yes...Deception, Very Much So. But it seems so little to all the pain so many others are have. Thank you.<P>Today: Good News and I just don't know news<BR>Good: Sara got off the bus and was real down, worked on her homework for about an hour before she told me that she didn't have any lunch money left(it's pre-paid to the school), and said Mom keeps forgetting to give me anymore. That got taken care of, then she perked up, so little they ask for. Gina came to get her & didn't want to give me the time of day, she just wanted to get Sara & leave. She didn't get her wish, Abby & Brooke got themselves out of the van while Gina was trying to get Sara in the van, they wanted to stay here. Thay smiled & and said come and get us Jack as they took off running through the yard. They are so full of love.<P>Don't know news:<BR>Gina said she stills would like me to adopt the girls, but she has not told the OP about any of this. She said he has no idea about any of this this and she is not going to tell him. They made and offer on a house yesterday & they are still going to get married on the 19th. Gina said I have not lied to him, I just have not told him everything.<P>I just feel so bad for the girls, knowing that they have to listen to Gina telling them what not to say all the way to his place. I just don't know.<P>Prayers to all<BR>Jack

Jack,<BR>Glad to hear the snacks went over well. Isn't it amazing how the littlest things make them so happy?!<P>One of these days, the girls are going to say something in front of the OM. They are so young and kids just can't keep quiet. It's not their nature. Kinda prepare yourself for what could happen if they do tell. <P>It would be great if you could get her to at least sign over guardianship of the girls before something like that happens. But don't pressure her. <P>Has she seen anyone about (legal aid, or a lawyer)you adopting the girls yet? You actually should see a lawyer, just for a consultation, about you possibly being the father of the unborn baby. They can order tests to be done when the baby is born. If it's yours, you can get visitation rights. Just something to think about for now.<P>Take care,<BR>Mitzi

Hi Everyone,<P>I pray that everyone had a better weekend than me.<P>The girls got off the bus here...then it went down hill. Don't get me wrong we had a great short Friday & a good time Saturday night, made breasfast then went to the circus...great time...PAGED Gina, told me to get the girls out on the road, her & the OP were on ther way...Don't even talk to me....I wavyed bye to the girls<BR>as they screamed & cried to stay here...kept my temper, It will never happen again<P>My Prayer are with everyon<BR>May all Your Dreams come True<BR>thanks for all the help<BR>love Jack<P>p.s.lOVE IS NOT BLIND BUT IT IS FORGIVING & ENDURING...for what it's worth<p>[This message has been edited by Jackh (edited March 05, 2000).]