This is my third attempt at a reply...I am beginning to think I should not post here. <P>Withdrawl is so much better. I experience really a lot of anger with my sadness now. I finally reach a point that I told OM that I COULD NOT DO IT ANYMORE. I experience anger at myself and at him for continuing the friendship (when I knew what I SHOULD DO) knowing there was no future for us. As you know I still work with OM, on different sides of a building. The possibility is there to run into him though. If I do, I do not speak and just lower my head. Also if I see that I may be about to pass him in a hallway, I quickly turn and take another route. It may look very obvious, but I have to do this. He continued to send e-mails for a while with the final one saying "is there any way we can get past this and care for each other in some fashion?" I am proud to say that I did not reply, because NO, there is no way I can get past it, except to have NO CONTACT. My friends are all praying for a new job opportunity for me...it is time for me to leave there now. Something will happen eventually...I do not want to make a hasty decision.<P>Rebuilding is coming along. My husband has been out of town this week. I was actually glad to see him return and missed him while he was gone. I can remember a time not too very long ago that I looked forward and liked for him to be gone. So, this is progress.<P>Thank you for your interest and concern.

Good deal, Susan!! Sounds like great progress.

Susan,<P>This is great news. You should feel very proud of yourself. You have come a long way and grown so. I hope your H is appreciating your hard work.<P>God Bless You and Your Family,<P>JL

I do hope you get that new job soon! This will be much easier to deal with, when that happens. Moving to another state is even better <P>Good work.<BR>TNT

Matter of fact we had a long talk last night...I told him about running to OM's wife last week at a meeting....we all work for the same company, but she is in a different building. As I came out of my meeting, she was in the hall, and I rushed on out. I heard her say to someone, "I was supposed to be in that meeting". I thought "oh no".<P>Well I was able to talk with hubby and explain how awkward it was. I also was able to tell him that every day when I drive up to work I am reminded of my mistake. It is awkward at work and trying to stay in my cubicle all day. He is supportive of me finding another job, but will not just come out and tell me to quit.

Thanks, TNT,<P>Would you believe I mentioned that to my husband to? I have a friend moving to SC soon and I told him that I wanted to move there too.<P>Really and trully, the thought went through my head just Tuesday, that not only do I want to leave this job, at times I do want to leave this town. It is hard though because our 19 year old son has never lived anywhere else and would never leave here!!!!

Dr. Harley does suggest that the recovering spouses move out of the area.<P>That would really be wonderful!<BR>

Susan,<P>I'm so, so, so proud of you.<P>You have a courage, whether at work, or in plans to move, that elevates you so far above not just the OM... but many of us as well.<P>You're an inspiration... <P>Jim