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Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 11
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OP
Junior Member
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 11 |
<BR><p>[This message has been edited by Judith (edited March 21, 2000).]
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Joined: Nov 1999
Posts: 302
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Joined: Nov 1999
Posts: 302 |
Judith, ((((Hugs to you)))<P>It seems to me that you are struggling with whether or not you are fighting for this man because you love him, or because you don't want to be the loser to another woman...<P>I think that you do love him but like you said, he is not giving you anything back. I guess what I would tell you to do is to think very hard about what you want and what is best for you.<P>Is the relationship worth fighting for? Can the two of you make it work together? Will he give up the OW and be faithful to you? <P>I think you will find that there will be many people here willing to listen and support you as you need it. Hang around a while and good luck to you....
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Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 11
Junior Member
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OP
Junior Member
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 11 |
Lacee<P>Thanks for the hug and your comments. I really do love this man. It is not case of "her" not having him. <P><p>[This message has been edited by Judith (edited March 21, 2000).]
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Joined: Dec 1999
Posts: 3,467
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Joined: Dec 1999
Posts: 3,467 |
Judith,<BR>First I want to ask if you are married? I think by some of the things you said that you aren't.<BR>My story is not really like yours. I just recently decided to end my marriage because my H is abusive. (in every way). I was with him for 14 yrs and abused for 10 of those yrs. For the first 2 months I posted here, I was determined to save my marriage. One day I woke up and thought NO MORE. I still have love for my H and I think it took me being away from him for 2 months caused me to realize that I would be happier without him. It was a very, very hard place to find. Giving up on someone you love is never easy.<P>If you aren't married, seek some counseling to help you thru the pain of getting over him, if you aren't able to get him to make the commitment that a relationship requires. If you are married, he needs to be able to make a commitment to the marriage in order for it to work. <P>You have to decide what is best for you.<P>Good luck and prayers,<BR>Mitzi <BR>
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Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 11
Junior Member
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OP
Junior Member
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 11 |
Hi Mitzi<P>No, we are not married. We have both been previously married and both have grown-up children from our marriages.<P>I suppose I want to try and understand why I would want to pursue this, why I love him when he has used and abused me and taken me for such a ride.<P>Why am I such an idiot? I suppose I just need your support in letting go and getting on with my life. I need to courage to KNOW that life will be so much better without him.<P>I do know this for sure and yet.........<P>Judith
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