Yesterday morning my wife took our daughter (2.3 year old) to the doctors because she hurt her leg. I called home several times to try to find out the outcome with no luck. I finally contacted the doctor directly and am told that she broke her tibia and had a 1:30PM appointment with an orthopedic surgeon. So I left work and headed to the surgeons office. This doctor sets a cast and tells us she'll have to wear it for 4 weeks.... not to serious BUT my wife did not contact me about any of this and says she tried but did not want to leave a message on my voice mail... she says between appointments (primary care, radiologists, orthopod) she just drove around (for over an hour)... Come to find out she went to the OM house between appointments.<P>Does she think I am stupid. Come-on drove around for over an hour with a two year old with a broken leg! Is she so addicted that she would rather be with the OM than call me and inform me that our daughter has a broken leg?<P>I think I am about ready to help her pack up and they can have each other. <P>I hope tomorrow is better.

Yikes! Tough day yesterday. I hope today will be better for you. Did does not seem to matter to spouses if they are acting so crazy. I think of it as 'they walk and talk, but they have no operating brain at the moment'. I just could not spend that much energy trying to figure out the lodgic, because there was none. It will drive you crazy if you even try. Just know they are without their brains right now. Hopefully, with the Harley's workbook, and books, you can hang in there and reach an end to the nightmare. I am a big fan of the workbook, because you can photocopy the Emotional Needs Inventory and the Love Busters. Actually do the form helped me. I had read the books, but the forms really helped sink it in.<P>There are lots of people who have regained their marriages. You can to. Do not lose hope. Have you had a telephone conference with Dr.'s Steve or Jennifer Harley? They are THE BEST counselors I have ever talked with. (I have talked with plenty - no progress). My h and I are on the path to recovery thanks to the Harley's. (this was my H's 3rd affair, and I was calling it quits. Been there, did counseling - no help). The telephone call works surprizingly well. They are quick, quick to get a grasp of your situation, and start a plan. It always took a in person counselor 10 meetings just to get the history. The Harley's are much different. i saw improvement in my h within a few days. Of course, he did start the no contact rule. I do hope this helps. Keep posting.

Triumph<P>I feel so bad for you and don't know what to say except that I'm feeling for you now.<P>Some years back I left my husband of many years. No affair or infidelity, I just did not love him anymore - not in the "married" sense and could not bring myself to have marital relations with him - that part had gone on for 5 years although we did still sleep in the same bed.<P>I don't know what happened to our marriage, it just faded away and when we realised this to be the situation it was somehow too late. I had no interest in trying to make it work at all even though I thought very highly and still do, of my husband.<P>I can tell you that he is so much happier now than when we were together and so am I to some extent except that for the past year I have been in an abusive relationship that brought me to this site.<P>Whatever happens, whatever you decide to do or not to do - it will be as it's meant to be.<P>If there is any hope and any love left between the two of you (and it has to be there for both of you, I think) FIGHT like crazy to fix it, no matter what she's done.<P>The past is just that - PAST.<P>Good luck.<P>Judith