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Joined: Feb 1999
Posts: 180
Q
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Joined: Feb 1999
Posts: 180
In my attempt to "affair-proof" my relationship, I'm trying hard to eliminate love-busters, and my SO considers one of my major ones my "lack of support" for his new job. The problem is that there are some rather unsavory, underhanded goings-on related to his office (not at his level, but in management) of which I don't morally approve. However, when I express these opinions (as he tells me about them), he interprets these as criticisms of him and the job HE'S doing (although I try to be clear about it). Other than saying, "That's nice, dear" (when I think something sucks), how do I do this?? Having strong opinions and depositing love units sometimes seem to be diametrically opposed.<p>[This message has been edited by quandry (edited March 03, 2000).]

Joined: Dec 1999
Posts: 163
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Joined: Dec 1999
Posts: 163
quandry, <P>I don't post too much but your post struck me. My H and I have had a lot of problems in this same area. H would come home from work and right away start telling me about all the things going on. It finally got to the point in which I disliked the people he worked for very much(like you said not at his level but people above H). <P>We have come to an agreement that if H wants to talk about work thats fine, but his work only. Nothing to do with the other people involved. If H can't talk about just him then I don't want to hear it(sounds harsh but I had to say that to get my point across). <P>He doesn't dislike these people out of work but his talking made me dislike them all together. I had no reason other then what he had told me about to dislike these people. I didn't like the fact that I was like this and it made it very hard to go to work social events with H and be social with all these people. <P>So I suggest to you to sit down and talk to him about this and explain that you don't always like the way you feel when he tells you everything and that you like to hear about HIS day not theirs.<P>falsely accused<BR>


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