Hi, fellow MB friends, I have been mostly just laying low and away from this board. I a have been really conflicted about my future and what exactly I wanted to do. For any newbies, my wife's EA and physical affair is now almost 9 mths old, and she moved out almost 7 mths ago now. <P>Long story short, my patience, plan A , and desire to wait has really been waning. My respect for my wife has been taking a beating. Just within the last 2 weeks, she is starting to bring the OM out into her reality. I found out she went with OM and our daughter (3yr old) to a co-worker's home to do a couples and kids thing (other kids are 3 and 5). I am sorry, but my strong Christian faith and value was telling me this was very unacceptable in my eyes. I essentially told her today, we needed to resolve our situation, so that she could expose our child to boyfriend in a "divorce" situation and not in unresolved marriage situation. (i.e. adulterous affair relationship). Well.. she then agreed it was time to seek a resolution, she had consulted a lawyer and then I offered the mediator option. Looks, like we both agreed there has to be a resolution. She got misty a couple of times, wouldn't say she cried, mostly misty when we talked about affects of this on our child. Yeah, I guess she is still deep in fantasyland, but I can't sit on my hands anymore. Her only new explanation or revelation... After I reiterated that she had said she had lost respect for me (leading to her not treating me well by jumping into affair and lying and leaving) she said, "No, I respect you as a person, individual, father, but I never had that respect for you as my marriage partner"<P>Huh?? I was taken aback by that one. Maybe just another way of saying I never loved you since the beginning. I did my standard, I am sorry for my behaviors that may have led to losing respect, but she clung to the never having the respect. The mentality and damage that affairs brings is just beyond me. So, in a nutshell it looks like divorce is looming, but maybe more at peace not being in limbo. Was it jersey joe that was seeking to move on? I know the feeling, I have just felt like moving on, though I love the woman that was my wife (not sure if she's still there inside that body). <P>------------------<BR>