Can someone tell me why to try anymore. My W and I know she lost her love for me over 8 years ago, early in our marriage. Since that time, there have been 3 affairs for her and a one night stand for me. I love her dearly, but now she says I am like a dear friend to her. Her last affair, proven only 3 weeks ago, was a full blown sexual deal that tormented me for over 5 months. Many lies, etc... This one cost a man his job and career and will eventually do the same for me. He was my boss. Now, my company sees her as a liability. The two of them mananged to mess up the opportunity of a lifetime with this company. I wanted to reconcile with her, and she says the same, but with everyday that passes, I just don´t understand why I should even try. I don´t know how to make her happy or if she ever could be with me. I only know that I am tired, very tired, of wanting her love. I am feeling like it is better to end it now while we are at least friends, for our 20 month old´s sake in the future. We have an appointment with an MB counselor for this next Monday, but right now I don´t know if it is worth my time. Why shouldn´t I just let her go and chalk it up to we tried--for 10.5 years that is. She says she loved the last one and really wants to learn to love me that way. Says she does not want out, but I, many times, think she is staying because of convenience. We have discussed my changing jobs to spend more time with her.<BR>She feels togetherness is the key along with communication. Yet, last night, she discussed going back to school to be a cop. How will swing shifts, night shifts, etc... promote togetherness between us, let alone our son. It would definetly not be an enthusiatic agreement. I am tired of giving and her taking. I have been a good man to her and done every thing I knew to do to make her happy, yet I have failed. Why can´t I be allowed to give up and walk away?<BR>I don´t even know if she is sincere about reconciling or if she is just stringing me along until the grass looks greener again. I am even beginning to have doubts if I am our sons father. These are terrible things to think about my W and the woman I love, but they are there. Is this normal after having such a disaster? Would a separation help? When do you say when? Someone tell me, why try anymore? I just want to be happy again and feel love from someone. Maybe she will never be able to provide that, and then this whole scenerio will repeat. WHY???<BR>LHC
