It's been four months since my wife had her affairs. We have left the area (left the state) and started a new life in a new place. My wife is back with me again and things overall are good. But I am still soooo ANGRY!! And it's not only the fact that she did what she did, it was the way that she treated me when everything was going on. She played with me like a yoyo for almost 2 months, and two days before I was going to leave the state without her she came back, said she had finally realized what she was going to lose. I am not a pridefull person, but I did everything including getting on my knees to try and make her realize how much I loved her and wanted her back, then she would leave and go to the OM, I gave up too much of my self during all that. I know I should be happy that we are still together and that we have a chance to start again, but I still can't forget the way she treated me while she was "working things out" and it hurts.<P>Please advice??<BR>Jason

Hi, again, Jason.<P>Your anger is normal. You're gonna have a lot of intense feelings during this ride.<P>Try to find a way to vent it without causing damage to the marriage you're trying to rebuild.<P>Posting here is a great idea. We'll listen to you rant anytime. You can blow off steam and then redirect that energy into making your marriage the best it can be.<P>It is rough. It is hard. But you can do it.<P>Hang in there.<P>Lori

Jason,<P>You have <B>everything</B> going for you right now. It may not seem like it, but here's what I see:<P>You left the state, no chance of OM getting to your W, no chance of running into the OM, no chance of seeing his car driving around town - NO OTHER MAN.<P>She got her head on straight and came back to you and even <B>left the state</B> to prove her love.<P>You are together.<P>I know it hurts, I've been on both sides of this, and it tortures your heart and soul.<P>Time is the great healer, and if you are a spiritual person, God doesn't do too bad at the healing game either!<P>Best wishes to you...<P>Look at what you DO have and appreciate it... you are very blessed indeed!<P>------------------<BR>The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction, not a destination.<BR>-Carl Rogers<BR>