Yes....my intuition tells me that OW is still in the picture....I am not sure how deeply she is in this picture and when I try to find out from him and question him he gets really upset with me.....tells me he feels like he is in prison.....I request to know where he is and what he does on his day off (Monday)and want to know why he is late coming home from work.......I really don't think he has had the time to devote to her but I know that he talks to her......because he gets really defensive when I ask this question.......Other than being very defensive and not wanting to talk about the betrayal, he is being a wonderful husband<BR>and he is being very, very, loving towards me, something that was not happening before. <BR>He tells me he wants to be only with me and its difficult to rebuild if I keep bringing her name up.....meanwhile.....I have my doubts because he lies, has lied to me for months and months...I am just worried that he is getting comfortable with me, is still keeping her, waiting in the wings for the waters to calm and then re-start with her......she is a dangerous slut...and he has no integrity...and once a cheater always a cheater... I just have a problem because I am not allowed to bring up this subject anymore..........he gets too upset with me.........

Sadforever, I almost didn't respond to your post, because what I have to say may confirm your feelings. My H did the same thing. It seemed like we were really working on our marriage but the whole time he was still seeing her, talking to her this all the time when I thought there was no possible way he had time to, but he did. I assume you know what has hapened he has been gone for 4 months now living with the OW. OUr counselor finally got him to tell me the truth. Well the rest I don't wnat to go into right now. You can check my profile or I am sure you have read my other post. You have to go with your feelings and especially when they are backed by the fact he won't let you bring the OW up (my would talk about her either) I always felt that he had not given her up. I can't tell you what to do but I do know that there can not be lies if he is really working on the marriage. Prayers and HUGS.<P>------------------<BR>di<P>

Hi Sadforever,<BR>YOur story sounds sooooo much like mine. I also do not see where he would have the time to see her but I feel that there is some contact. H does not like me to talk about it at all, says he wants to forget and if I keep bringing it up neither of us can. Well there goes my feelings shut down again. It is so amazing how they do the hurt byt the conditions are put on us?????<BR> Other than these things he also is loving most of the time. It makes it all very confusing. To rebuild you have to have some level of trust, but that is so hard when all you can think of is the betrayl and lies. <P>------------------<BR>God is our refuge and STRENGTH,<BR>A very Present help in trouble.<BR>Psalm 46:1<BR>I sought the Lord and he heard me, <BR>and delivered me from all my fears.<BR>Psalms 34:4<P>

same thing exactly for me. im giving up.

A general thanks to all of you for responding<BR>to my post. I am glad some of you out there<BR>understand what I am going through.....let me explain that one evening about three weeks ago we had another major fight.....I accused him of making calls to her (just a hunch, a feeling that he was, no tangible proof).....he denied and denied (they are good at that)......we went to bed and the next morning he came to talk to me just before I left for work.....ADMITTED that he talked to her "a couple of times", "about business"......(she just left the job because of this)......the problem is that I AM POSITIVE contact is continuing.....I AM SURE TOO that he is even still cutting her hair (he is a hairstylist) and he is still lying to me......what do I do??????? pretend to believe him ? Let him go ? Compromise my self worth ? He is a skilled liar......can I pretend to believe him the rest of my life ?<P>