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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 44
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 44 |
He went out last night and did not kiss me hello when he came home nor did he kiss me goodnight - (although he only stayed out for an hour after work). And did call to tell he was going and called on his way home to say he was driving home. Should I have thanked him for coming home early - and kissed him. I don't want to talk to him because the questions that go thru my mind are all about was she there and who else went - i've asked him who else goes and he refused to tell me other names. <P>Please give me some advice - i really don't want to LB<P>Sam
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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 5,406
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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 5,406 |
Sam,<P>Did your snooping turn up anything?<P>...and now that I asked the question...<BR>...it doesn't matter...<P>First work on <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8113_ab.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan A</A> to the fullest...<P>Being honest is tough...<BR>...clearly hard for him...<P>But for you...<BR>... I'd check out <B>Lora</B>'s post... <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum28/HTML/002262.html" TARGET=_blank>How to say my feelings without it being a LB</A>.<P> ![[Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com]](http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/smile.gif) <P>Jim<p>[This message has been edited by NSR (edited April 12, 2000).]
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 44
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 44 |
thanks for answering,<P>Should i call him now to say hi and ask how his day went - i don't know how to approach him w/o lb or him seeing thru me<P>samantha
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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 5,406
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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 5,406 |
Call him if you normally do...<P>Otherwise...<BR>...take time out to plan an emotional need of his to be fulfilled...<P>...make it simple...<P>...make it fun...<P>I think the idea of some "Recreational Companionship" is always good...<BR>...usually high on a man's list of needs.<P> <P>Jim
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 44
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 44 |
Thanks Jim,<P>I usually don't call in fact today would be odd for me to call since he is attending a conf. <P>I will not call - i just wanted to hear his voice but he probably would have been cold to me anyway.<P>Instead I"ll go to the bathroom at work and cry some more.<P>Thanks<P>Sam
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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 5,406
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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 5,406 |
Sam...<P>It's OK to cry...<BR>...heaven knows I did after my yesterday too.. ![[Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com]](http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/frown.gif) <P>When you've stopped... and you will... <BR>Catch the proverbial breath...<P>...and it's time to work on <B>you</B>...<BR>...read some of the MB sites...<P>...if you're stuck... check out some of those <B>inspirational messages</B> on my <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000013.html" TARGET=_blank>Notable Posts/Threads</A> post...<P>Then read about meeting those ===><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi3300_needs.html" TARGET=_blank>Emotional Needs</A>!<BR>Check out Lora's post again!<P>Hang tough...<BR>...you can do it!!!<BR>I have faith in you!<P> <P>Jim
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 44
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 44 |
I know i am negative and i am being a taker because i want him to stop being friends w/ her and telling him he needs to make a choice between her friendship (which is only 6mths) and his marriage to a woman he's known for 16yrs.<P>I just feel like he has taken everything from me that i believed in and trusted.<P>I really need to learn to stop obsessing on the relationship he has w/ her and stop wondering what they are doing. Afterall he told me he would never have sex w/ her because she is nothing but a two bit whore who just feeds his ego. He is being stubborn about this EA because I am making him stop - if i learn to control those feelings and he see's it doesn't bother me maybe it will stop on his own.<P>I hope.<P>sam<P>
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