Ok, everyone, I need your help desperately. It has not been long (approx 1 mo.) since I found out about my H's EA w/ 2 people and I am suspecting he is still in an affair with someone else. I have been reading this site and am trying to execute Plan A. We also talked about putting some of the MB info into to action (formally writing our plan, etc.). Anyway, I am trying to be so very patient w/ H that I find that I am losing it (yelling, very impatient) w/ other people (my kids, telephone solicitors,etc. anyone that seems to get under my skin). I feel like I am yelling at everyone else & keeping my anger in against the one really deserves it. Also, where do you all suggest we start? I was thinking "How to survive an affair" and then go on from there.

TXSupermommy,<P>"We also talked about putting some of the MB info into to action "...<BR>Does that mean your H is willing to acknowledge the affair... and leave it?<P>Your <B>anger</B> should be addressed...<BR>...it could be out of depression...<BR>(check out some of the discussions on the forums... see the <B>Medication/Stress/Depression:</B> section in <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000013.html" TARGET=_blank>Notable Posts/Threads</A> post.<BR>)<BR>...it could be stress...<BR>...it could be just plain old anger...<B>Anger Management:</B><BR><OL TYPE=1><BR><LI> <A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0806509376" TARGET=_blank><B>Anger : How to Live With and Without It</B></A> by Albert Ellis <BR><LI> <A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1879237970" TARGET=_blank><B>Angry All the Time :</B> An Emergency Guide to Anger Control</A> by Ron Potter-Efron, Ronald T. Potter-Efron <BR><LI> <A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0800786467" TARGET=_blank><B>Getting the Best of Your Anger</B></A> by Les Carter <BR></OL>...and check out the site...<A HREF="http://www.anger-stress-marriage.com" TARGET=_blank>Anger & Stress Management Communication Skills for Marriages and Relationships in Conflict</A>.<P>Addressing your anger will make it easier to cut down on the <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi3400_lovebust.html" TARGET=_blank>Love Busters</A>!<P>Are you considering counseling?...<BR> see the <B>Counseling:</B> section in <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000013.html" TARGET=_blank>Notable Posts/Threads</A> post.<P>If you were in recovery... the best books would be...<BR><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi6020_needs.html" TARGET=_blank>"His Needs, Her Needs"</A> and <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi6010_give.html" TARGET=_blank>"Give & Take: The Secret to Marital Compatibility"</A> (great for an understanding of <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi3500_policy.html" TARGET=_blank>The Policy of Joint Agreement(POJA)</A>).<P>If your still just getting over the affair... stick with <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi6070_sa.html" TARGET=_blank>"Surviving An Affair"(SAA)</A>... it's a great first book.<P>If your H needs to understand impact of his affair... have him read (if he is the type)...<A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0393307077" TARGET=_blank><B>Private Lies :</B> Infidelity and Betrayal of Intimacy</A> by Frank Pittman.<P> <P>Jim

Jim, That should keep me busy for awhile. He has admitted to 2 of the affairs. I have no proof of a current one. Talk is not good w/o action. Thank you!!!