<BR>I'm finished with all of this, I'm just gonna sign the papers he is sending me I just cant do it any more, my hope, dreams and every things else is gone, even my romantic love for him is gone.<P>He says he owes me nothing not even answers to my questions. Guess 10 years of loving him and being the mother of his children means nothing to him. I once thought it did.<P>I have been in a solid plain A since Jan not even calling him letting him call me and a so-so plan A since he told me he wanted out last July.<P>I'm gonna go out for the first time in 8 years and see how much the world has changed, and if I find someone I don't know how I'll react but I have to do something or I'm gonna pine away for him forever. <P>What will I do if he comes back? I'll look at him in a whole new light that's for sure, I no longer see him as the greatest man god created he is no longer that, may have never been. But I will not let him control my heart like this again, I would DEMAND we date for a long time just so I can see him for real this time. And I have told him form now on when he gets on that plain and comes 6000 miles to visit us, there will be no sex of any kind, and I told him friendly gestures are fine but the whole touching my face and looking in my eyes wont work anymore to get what he wants.<P>So for now it's my 2 angels and me and we will be ok, how could I go wrong when I put their hearts in mind first.<P><BR>Lesa<P> <P>------------------<BR>"It took me quite a while to realize that <B>the real deal</B> is to be able to be enough of a person your own to know when somebody loves you and cares about you"<BR>----Stevie Ray Vaughan<P>"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and<BR> lean not unto thine own understanding." -Proverbs 3:5<BR>Take care and God Bless.<P> lms20ish@jobe.net

{{{{{{{{{{Lesa}}}}}}}}},<P>My heart goes out to you...<P>Above all else...<BR>...you are right about "how could I go wrong when I put their(kid's) hearts in mind first."<P>Taking care of you and the kids first... will let you grow!!!<P>You know... I'd always suggest a <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8113_ab.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan B</A> first... and then a divorce... but if reached that point in your life... where you see no hope... you need to do what <B>you've decided</B>.<P>If you read my recent post...<BR>...I too may be moving from a <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8113_ab.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan A</A>... straight into a divorce as well. <P>I'm praying for you and your kids...<BR>...you all deserved so much better.<P>God will bless and keep you.<P> <P>Jim

Lesa,<P>Honey, Where have you been???? I know, your in a rough spot right now. Making this decision may be the best thing for you to grow. <P>You need to think more about you right now. And the kids. He's giving up so much and in time he will realize that. But for you, it may be too late. <P>Love ya,<BR>Mitzi

Lesa,<P>You know that I understand. My heart and prayers goes out to you. It's a tough decision to make, but it comes the time when we must make that decision for ourselves. And no one else can do it for us. Just know that I support you 100%. God know every tear you've cried. He knows how you've been there for your kids despite when you've felt like giving up. He knows how you fought with everything in you. God Knows Lesa and I know he cares. So do I. I miss chatting with you, but like you I haven't been on much lately myself. But you know where to find me whenever you need to vent, to cry, to joke, to laugh, and male bash,lol. <P>Love ya like a sister.<P><P>------------------<BR>"If you can learn from the mistakes of others, you won't have to make them youself."<P>lady_divine77@yahoo.com

Hi Lesa,<P>I've missed you on-line and wondering how you have been. I'm sorry that it didn't work out between you & H. I guess that last trip he made really did it.<P>You are a survivor and it sounds like you have grown strong throughout this.<P>I'll be praying for you....

hi guys and gals,<P>Jim,<BR>I dont think I can even plan B no contact fom me is what he seems to want, the lies and every thing are just comming and comming, I cant take it any more and still be "friendly" with him for the kids.<P>Mitzi,<BR>I've just been trying to think things out alot, and by the way your more than welcome to come to the rodeo with me I think I'm gonna put the kids in mutten bustin contest <P>Jamie,<BR>darlin I've missed talkin to you too, and I'll man bash with ya any time <P>NoTrust,<BR>just give me a holler some time and let me know when ya are on, yes I will survive this!!! <P>I couldnt do this with out everyones support here I love you all, and you and your families are still in my heart and prayers.<P>Love<BR>Lesa<BR><P>------------------<BR>"It took me quite a while to realize that <B>the real deal</B> is to be able to be enough of a person your own to know when somebody loves you and cares about you"<BR>----Stevie Ray Vaughan<P>"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and<BR> lean not unto thine own understanding." -Proverbs 3:5<BR>Take care and God Bless.<P> lms20ish@jobe.net