Thank you friends for replying, it is so nice to log on and find that you have support and people are out there and and it's not just "me" I saw him briefly last night, I was calm, cool and collected and pleasant, he was agitated, confused and angry, I actuall thought he must be on speed or something as his nature is to be calm and centered and never did any drugs ect...as he was moving around so fast...then he actually "ran" away and drove off really fast irrationally....it was wierd...(and I didn't say anything except I love you very calmly) although I felt like he has lost it somewhere and I was sad about that I have never felt more normal seeing him in that state as I realize I am not in his state anymore...I think reality is hittin ghim and I have been through that already in the past months...so what to do now...has anyone seen their betraying spouse all agitated and confused angry and irratioanl..what is this? Thanks again I love the input and the support, it helps so much! <BR>

I have seen my W like this. She gets mad at the new me. She thinks it is all fake.<P>One minute I will be going to her house to visit her and the kids, and the next thing I know she is pissed at me and tells me to leave. <P>The reason for this is she is confused. She sees me with the kids and it makes her mad. I never really spent much time with my oldest son(4) when he was a baby. All I want to do now is spend time with my baby(4months), oldest and her.<P>I have seen her act the way you describe, and I am up and down with her emotions, and that is not good, I just try to hang in there and wait out this storm.<P>------------------<BR>brownphdt<P>

Hi joesbestfriend,<P>Your husband is going through symptoms of withdrawal... From what I saw in your profile... the OW is now out of the picture...<P>and since she(OW) was his addiction... he will have a period of withdrawal... much as a drug addict would or an alcoholic!<P>Some thoughts from <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi6070_sa.html" TARGET=_blank>"Surviving An Affair"(SAA)</A>... <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>An affair is a very powerful addiction. (page 56 of SAA)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>...and... <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Marital recovery cannot begin until withdrawal has ended. (page 68 of SAA)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>...and... <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>The pain of separation from a lover is great at first, but eventually comes to an end, and marital recovery can then begin. (page 70 of SAA)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>I don't know your whole story (just what I saw in your profile)... time to "fill in" the profile a bit... or provide a little history (or current stuff) in your post.<P>Are you and H living together?...<BR>Any children?...<BR>Have you been on any plan? <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8113_ab.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan A and Plan B</A> or Plan P(praying)?...<BR>How much contact are <B>you</B> having now?...<P>As part of withdrawal... a big symptom will be his addressing the guilty feelings he is bound to have....<P>My W (moved out >3 months ago... leaving me with kids)... is going though what appears to me to be some guilt... and...<BR>yes... she's mad/angry... she yells/cusses... she runs... (I stepped into house while she was picking up kids for a visitation last night... and she just bolts out of the house... without a word to me!)... I also tell her that "I love her"... In my case the agitation (I feel) is partially due to the fact that I am spoiling her "fantasy world"... since my W and her OM are still together!<P>Normally... if there is no contact between wayward(your H) and OW... <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8113_ab.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan A</A> is the way to go... Many do it long-distance...<P>Keep posting...<BR>Fill us in on the details...<P>Prayers... <P>Jim<BR>---------------------------------<BR>Where two or more are gathered...