Well....... my H is gone......... he left for a business trip and I don't know if I'll hear from him when he gets back... he'll probably call and talk to the kids.....<P>What I'm doing now is stocking up... yes buying groceries,staples etc like mad...<BR>Tomorrow I'm going to costc and buying 3 vcr's.. I'm putting them on the credit card and then I can take them back and get cash... I also plan to move the rest of his stuff in a storage locker and Fed X him the key with a very loving letter...(I have to compose it yet) I have to have all this done in two days..will have the locks changed too.<P>I just can't believe this is happening to me/us... I'm so very hurt inside and he whisteling dixie... I asked him how he could behave in such away and he stated.."you can be happy or sad over what is happening... and I choode to be happy" I feel very much alone here cause all the closests friends and family are 1200 miles away. Believe me, you should see my phone bills.<P>I just can't seem to stop the tears..... I have put myself in Gods hands and told him to guide me and leade me the direction he wants me to go... I just wish the hurting would stop.. <P>My H and I were always viewed as the couple with the perfect marriage... I live in a gosship colony and when this hits, it will be like pouring gasoline on the place....I sometimes wish I could crawl in a hole and never come out... I have two teenage sons(14 and 17) and I must be strong for them... No I have never thought of killing myself... heck, my H is the beneficiary of my police.. NO WAY is he or the OW gonna party on my death !!!<P>I just wonder, cause its been such along time, what it would feel like to have someone put there arms around me and really mean it... to have a warm genuine smile come my way...<P>I'm sorry for rambling... I feel like I could go on forever.....(thanks for listening/reading).......scoick

just wanted you to know that someone is listening. good luck. i wish i had something wise to say to you but i don't. i will keep you in my prayers.

scoick,<P>Ok...<BR>...you obviously can't continue in Plan A...<P>That's OK...<P>Now...<BR>...please start with Plan B...<P>(Your doing it a little harshly...<BR>...but it can still work)<P>Check out <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Archives/Archive-000001/HTML/20000110-1-011046.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan B - 101</A>...<P>...and 2 good <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8113_ab.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan B</A> letters to use would be...<BR><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum30/HTML/000032.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan-B Letter; The final cut...</A>(from WilliamJ) ...and...<BR><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum28/HTML/002756.html" TARGET=_blank>Revised plan B letter.Opinions please!</A> (from Bethn)<P>I'm serious about this...<P> <P>Jim