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Joined: Dec 1969
Posts: 2,440
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Joined: Dec 1969
Posts: 2,440 |
Quite often I've seen statistics thrown around that say that 90% of divorces are a result of infidelity. Taking my own personal inventory of friends/relatives, I only know of four out of ten that were related in any way to infidelity. Three of those divorces occurred because the husband was having ongoing affair(s) and wouldn't stop. The fourth was mine. The rest of them involved drugs, alcohol, or career differences (some would call it neglect). In retrospect, it appears that everyone needs some big reason to justify getting a divorce because there is no box on divorce papers that say "I'm not happy". Personally, I'm not buying that 90% statistic. I think it sells books though.<P>
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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 260
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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 260 |
Student - it's been a long time since I've read from you here. How are you?<P>My (limited) observations tend to SUPPORT the 90% theory. In my divorced and separated persons support group, there are a total of eleven individuals...ALL eleven are facing divorce (or have already divorced) as a result of infidelity.
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Joined: Dec 1969
Posts: 2,440
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Joined: Dec 1969
Posts: 2,440 |
Hi shattered,<BR>I'm doing fine. passed 2/3 of my quals, so life goes on...<P>Hmm. That is interesting. In your group, which were the initiators of the divorce? The other 7 divorces I know of that were not related to infidelity were mostly initiated by my friend/relative and were pretty much a 50/50 mix of men and women, so I don't think they had any reason to lie. The other three women that divorced say that they would have stayed with their husbands in spite of the infidelity if their H's had stopped the affair and had worked on rebuilding the marriage.
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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 260
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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 260 |
That's great about your qualifiers. I know they can be a real b1tch!<P>In my group, I'd say that about 50% of the individuals initiated the divorce (obviously) 50% of them are the recipients (like me). All eleven are the betrayed.<P>------------------<BR>He who has a "why" to live for can bear with almost any "how".<P>-Nietzsche-
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Joined: May 1999
Posts: 3,040
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Joined: May 1999
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Of the people I know with children who got divorced, I know of none that did not involve infidelity.
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Joined: Nov 1999
Posts: 924
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Joined: Nov 1999
Posts: 924 |
I think stats are right. Most people will not Divorce and leave "something" for "nothing". There is usually someone else involved in the decision. The reason I say this is because in the groups I go to for support, they all say that their spouse seemed very happy until someone became involved with them to prove otherwise. But what I always say......5 years from now the betrayer finds out......same sh-t, different face.
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