How did it all come to this?<BR>I have given up on H. He moved out 3 months ago and has made his D's not want to even talk to him. But it is my fault, I have been saying things about him to no one, just venting and they are picking up on it.<P>I dislike him and his actions so right about now I could care less if he ever wants to come back............ <P>For those who don't know me, H affair has been going on 6 years, councilor says it's probably a realtionship so he won't be back,<P>They are seen together and are together at work, But he tells my 16yr. old D when she asks if he is going to marry her that , that is a stupid question. ?????<P>He also told her he doesn't want to be around me,(something I'm sure has to do with guilt.)<P>So where do I go from here???<P>Do I plan B ? Do I throw up my hands and say fugetboutit!!!<P>I'm in a place at this moment,(which could change at any moment) where I don't care what he does and I'm doing great without him, so I should just move on and keep living my life and not think or even worry about him.<P>Well big words, but please don't think I'm a failure cause I don't want to try plan A anymore. I just don't have the motivation<BR>or feelings to care anymore.<BR>Where do I go from here? <BR>Just keep lurking, or go away because I have no words of encourgement for anyone????????<P>I feel I don't fit in here anymore so that's why I haven't really been hanging around .<P>Sorry so long, just thought I'd let you know what's going on in case anyone was interested. <BR> <P>------------------<BR>Peg

Oh {{{{{Peg}}}}},<P>I remember you... <P>You're probably a few step too far gone...<BR>...but in order to get closure...<BR>...I'd say go with <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8113_ab.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan B</A>.<P>(<A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8113_ab.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan A</A>) isn't for you anymore... unless you've done some excessive <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi3400_lovebust.html" TARGET=_blank>Love Busting</A>.<P>I'm sorry where you're at...<BR>...and the toll it's taken on you and your D!<P>Post some more...<BR>...we'll help you get through it...<BR>...with kind words...<BR>...and warm wishes!<P> <P>Jim

Thanks Jim.<P>------------------<BR>Peg

If you've done your best to be nice as pie, and you are losing your love for him, then go to plan B. Plan B isn't really that hard, (I think?) - if you are at the stage that you are at. <P>I remember you too. Did he ever put in that garden? <P>TNT

TNT<P>I feel I have been nice as pie, well not pie maybe old hard candy..............I would be nice and then he would say something like he wants to have the extra edger, he lives in an Apt for goodness sake or someone tells me<BR>they have seen them together at a church funtion(he doesn't even go to church.)<P>Well then I can't keep my feelings out of my<BR>voice, I don't say the words, I am nice but my tone isn't nice, so maybe plan B is for me cuz I really don't want to have to talk to him, I'm still too bitter. <P>Yes he did build a garden with some flower bushes and a flowering tree, and a few odds and ends, I'm not letting it die but I sure don't feel like making it beautiful!! If he gets the house(don't think theres much chance of that) then I will let it go to weeds.<P>Yes I know I am bitter but this went on for too long till I put a stop to the crud I took from him. It wasn't abuse, but indifference, no love, no lovemaking, no notice or interest in my life at all, he didn't even notice I had contacts! I have worn glasses for the last 3 years of our married life. <P> Oh well! enuff belly aching<BR>I need to get myself together and find tihngs that make me feel better about myself. <P>------------------<BR>Peg

Peggy,<P>I'm sorry. If you feel Plan B is right for you then go for it. The way I see it Plan B is to protect ourselves. <P><P>------------------<BR>You can't live with them, you can't kill them!<BR>Viki