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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 813
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OP
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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 813 |
Hi there,<P> Probably should have this on the recovery section but the message is same for everyone! <P> Short recap, we are in recovery now for 1yr., we have moved to start over and I've just found out my H has been in contact with OW.....however, H is out of fog and back to the loving kind H I used to know ....<P>Anyway, I talked to Steve today and HIGHLY recommend it for anyone that needs some help. He had me look at my situation in a completely different way and helped me see the big picture.<P> NO, I'm not getting a kickback!!! .....and NO I'm not related to K!!!!..... <P> LU<P>
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Joined: Jul 1999
Posts: 1,194
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Joined: Jul 1999
Posts: 1,194 |
Hi, Lu -- Could you give a little more detail about what your new "look" is??<P>Hugs,<P>--DeWayne--
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Joined: Dec 1969
Posts: 6,937
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Joined: Dec 1969
Posts: 6,937 |
Actually, I don't really know that I'm NOT related to Lu. After all, I do have sisters...<P> ![[Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com]](http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/smile.gif)
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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 813
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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 813 |
Hi Heartpain,<P> I was expecting Steve to say" well, the situation is progressing and to not LB about the calling of the OW, since my H now says it is definitely over." <P> First of all he asked me if I called the OW ? He thought that might be a good idea to get the "facts".....kind of floored me on that. Then he said that the situation with ou marriage is that it is being "jumpstarted" by H being loving , kind etc. but that alone will not guarantee success because he is not taking the actions he needs to guard against another affair. Very eye opening to me......progress is superficially being made....and we need a concrete Plan with both participating.....<P>K,<BR> Won't tell if I'm one of your sisters!!!...I do have 3 brothers!!!! LU
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Joined: Dec 1969
Posts: 6,937
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Joined: Dec 1969
Posts: 6,937 |
Uh oh... I have two brothers too... <P>You know that I highly recommend getting Steve's input; he gives you twists to the MB material that you (or I or anyone else) might not see. And it usually makes very good sense.
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Joined: May 1999
Posts: 3,758
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Joined: May 1999
Posts: 3,758 |
Re: Superficial recovery...<P>I think your husband is my husband's brother ![[Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com]](http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/wink.gif)
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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 813
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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 813 |
Hi K,<P> Hey, I'm Catholic too!!......and LU is a fake name!!<P>Anyway, I agree, that what was so GOOD about the session and why I'm urging people to talk to him is that I thought for sure I knew what he was going to say .I thought it might be a pep talk to keep me going. He basically told me that unless my H realizes the behaviors he needs to have , accountability etc. eventually the marriage will go down the tubes. And asking me if I called the OW to get info was surprising....then when I said I would GLADLY call her, he told me maybe I should"hold off"!! <P>So, people , it can't hurt to call Steve and it CAN help!!......... LU<P>TNT,<P>Maybe our H's ARE brothers!!! LU
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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 5,798
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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 5,798 |
Calling Steve sounds like it was a GREAT thing for you. I think our reconciliations were always skewed by falling back into old behaviors--one or both of us. Now we're both hesitant...<P>Hmm.<P>Thanks for sharing Lu.<P>------------------<BR>Lor<BR>"Let love be genuine...hold fast to what is good; love one another." Rom 12:9-10
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