I haven't posted for a long time. Just haven't had the time. <P>It hasn't been because of any major change in our situation, just a chance to sit at my computer and read.<P>It has been right at 2 years since he ended his affair, about 22 months since I found out about it and right at a year since we moved to another town to "start over".<P>My parents just found out about his affair over the weekend. All H**L has broken loose. I knew that all it would take is for someone to say "Leave him and come stay with us" and I would have done it 2 years ago. I never dreamed the same would hold true after all this time.<P>I feel like such a fool in the eyes of my parents for staying with him. My Mom warned me about AIDS and how it can show up over 10 years after being exposed. I feel that if I go near him I am putting my life on the line. I haven't let him touch me since my visit to my parents over the weekend. <P>It was also the first time I have left him and gone to visit my family without leaving some of the kids with him. He was left totally to his honor, and I do not have any trust that he stayed faithful to me.<P>I am back to square one, but with the added pressure of the fear that my Dad will kill my H and my Mom begging me to come home.

LuLu:<P>You've come so far--don't let your parents mess things up!<P>They want to protect their little girl, and sometimes parents forget that the little girl is all grown up (I know my mom is like that).<P>As far as AIDS goes, why don't you do a little research on your own. Get yourself and your H tested. I think (and I could be wrong) that it's SYMPTOMS that could take that long to show up; I think that the antibodies show up earlier and can be detected. I want to say six months, but I'm not sure. Do the research and make the calls. It stinks to have to do it, but it's better to do it than play guessing games.<P>Your H has moved with you and agreed to stay with you. Is there anything in particular that he could do to earn your trust again?<P>Good luck to you, LuLu. --HBC

We have both been tested. There is such conflicting information out there.<P>When I came back from my trip I had no confidence that he had stayed faithful and then immediately started feeling that dread we all know, that maybe he has still been cheating all along. That brings up the AIDS fear even worse.