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Joined: Jun 1999
Posts: 921
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Joined: Jun 1999
Posts: 921 |
I don't know if this would help anyone else but it is helping me, I am reading "Dancing with Anger" right now. It has been tremendous help to me to sort out what is anger and what is bitterness and to let me know that my anger is ok, that I have a right to it. It's what I do with the energy that this anger produces. Can I move this anger into a positive way or do I just dwell on it and misuse this power? I highly recommend this book to anyone that feels they don't truly understand that the anger you have also represents other emotions and that anger is the way it expresses itself. God Bless!<P>------------------<BR>Chick's <BR>Bren<P>You won't see things until your ready to not be blind!<P>
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Joined: Nov 1998
Posts: 1,035
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Joined: Nov 1998
Posts: 1,035 |
WS - Finally, someone on this forum saying something about anger that really makes sense to me! Too often here, I'll read a post where someone vents and then they apologize for venting and even for getting angry. I want to suggest that all of us digest the many wise comments about legitimate anger on this thread, and use them to help us "get in touch" with OUR anger. And you know? Guilt is just the flip side of anger, anyway. So if you DON'T allow yourself to be legitimately angry (not the same thing as rage or hate) then you will probably just end up feeling illegitimately guilty. I think this happens to a lot of us betrayeds and it's extremely self-destructive.<P>Regards and blessings,<P>--Wex
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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 2,388
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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 2,388 |
hey Wex<BR>This anger thing is very complicated.<BR>So many of us are ashamed of our anger and think we need to hide it, apologize for it etc.<BR>How can we let go if we don't allow ourselves to feel it?<BR>This is an ongoing problem for me and seems to create cycles.<BR>I love the points you made. Fighting against legitimate anger instead of feeling it IS very self destructive.
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Joined: Jan 1999
Posts: 71
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Joined: Jan 1999
Posts: 71 |
HELP!!!<BR>I am 15 month into recovery and there is not one single day that I don't get angry and feel the pain of my H infidelity.<BR>I'm told to move on and look ahead into the future, a future he wants to make good for us. So, why can't I look past all this ? Why <BR>is my anger still so strong? Why can't I forgive? I ask what is wrong with me?<BR>I stuggle with this on a daily basis.<BR>
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Joined: Jun 1999
Posts: 921
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Joined: Jun 1999
Posts: 921 |
I wonder if that is anger or bitterness? I would suggest reading the workbook thread, #3, It's the one about bitterness. I truly believe theres a difference.<P>------------------<BR>Chick's <BR>Bren<P>You won't see things until your ready to not be blind!<P>
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