I am so hurt and mad,AGAIN. Son had an out of town soccer tournament this past weekend and we had some problems with getting him there. H wanted it IN WRITING that I was giving him permission to take son. My attorney said that wasnt necessary. H yelled dont contact me again, then I get an email from him saying if I need to contact him quickly I have his permission to email him.<BR>Like if we have an emergency I will find a computer and email him.(sorry to be so sarcastic). Then attorney calls and says H attorney contacted her and its fine for H to take son for weekend and I dont need to sign anything. All the while, I am scrambling in case I need to take son myself, trying to figure things out at the last minute and wondering if H was just trying to get out of taking son. Now when son gets home, I find out it wasn't just a father and son thing, like I thought it was but that OW was along, and they spent the night at a friends house(friend of mine too) but mostly H friend and they slept in same room. My son is 16 but I am upset about this being forced on him, I am taking him to a counselor tomorrow. Does anyone have any ideas on how to handle this behavior with children involved? It is almost like a role reversal with son acting 47(H age) and H acting 16 again. <P>------------------<BR>joanne<P>

Oh, Joanne - don't you wonder where their heads are sometimes - oops, never mind!<P>It was wrong and unfair for him to include ow during the weekend. I think the counsellor idea is the best. Maybe he/she can give you some better ideas.<P>Just wanted you to know I was reading and I'm sending support your way.<P>{{{{{{{{{{{{Joanne}}}}}}}}}}}}<P>Lori

I can so understand your pain and frustration.<BR>It is so hard to understand how this can be done to the children, but there is no regard for their needs. OW is now a big part of H life. 2 kids see him with OW while 2 will not. Guess what..he will manipulate untilthey do and blame me until they do. All I told my children is that whatever they choose to do in terms of seeing OW will in no way change my relationship with them but that they have choices to make. I did tell my older two (twins of 19) that if they choose to see OW then they are letting their father believe that his course of behaviour was OK in their eyes no matter whether they feel this or not in other words they are enabling him to justify his behaviour, despite what they personally might feel. <BR>My 16 year old will see OW as "dad is nicer to me when she is around" What a shame!!!