Well, the party was a big surprise to my H, even though not very many folks came...most of our friends either had to work or were out of town.<P>The stripper was good, although we didn't get the petite blonde with long hair and big boobs. Turns out that she didn't go for setting husbands up. Got a petite brunette with beautiful big baby blue eyes. She did a good job. I think H even tried to cop a feel or two ...although I had told all the guys that the agency said no touching was allowed. Anyway, I didn't even act like I noticed...good for me!<P>Now, it doesn't look so good. Stripper slipped H "her cellphone number", along with an invitation and her "home address" (really my best friend's new address , which H doesn't know) on a sticky note. She slipped it into his pants pocket. H has not told me about it, nor did he throw it away. He has it neatly tucked away inside his wallet. So, I'm now just sitting tight and waiting.<P>If H calls the number, I'll have his number on caller ID of my new cellphone. If he shows up at the address she gave him when anybody's home, he'll come face to face with my best friend, who will let me know. I'm wondering what story he's gonna cook up as an explanation....if he calls or tries to see the stripper.<P>Anyway, I'm hanging on tight for the roller coaster ride. It's strange, but I'm not really upset that he's saving the number. I guess I expected him to do so. And, strangely enough, I see the possibility of his calling the stripper as perhaps a real opportunity to save our marriage. It's sort as if I need to grab him by the b**** to get him to really work on things, ya' know?<P>On a positive note, H was tickled to death that I threw him the party. He was so affectionate last night and this morning; made love to me today...really, not the impersonal quickie that's been usual for him.<BR>So, I guess I deposited some love units last night. He said he had a really good time, and I didn't b**** about his drinking. He's been pretty good about not drinking due to his diabetes, but I know that he has to decide to completely give up drinking on his own.<P>So, here I sit, waiting and watching...

SweetPea,<P>Hang in there, he may be keeping it as a reminder of the night this young sexy thing came on to him. Kind of an ego stroke thing.<BR>Something to brag to his buddies about.<P>Please keep us updated though.<P>Now go for a walk or something, don't sit there and worry yourself sick waiting for something to happen. If it does it does.<P>You will know either way soon enough.<P>Take care of yourself<P>------------------<BR>Just call me - Deb<BR>------------------------<BR>The only day I can do anything about is today, yesterday is gone, tomorrow is not yet mine.<P>Hepatitis C, educate yourself ! <A HREF="http://hepatitis-central.com/" TARGET=_blank>http://hepatitis-central.com/</A>

Hi, Deb,<BR> Thanks for the encouragement. H isn't the type to keep mementos...never has been. Although, there was a rather raunchy card on the bathroom vanity the other day that I had tucked into his travel kit when he went on a hunting trip last year. I left it alone, and today, I discovered it in his sock drawer. So, who knows?<P> Anyway, I don't think he would be bragging to the guys about it. He keeps stuff pretty close. Guess he's afraid I'll find out.<P> And, you know something? I'm not worrying myself sick. I'm not even mad that he's got the sticky note so carefully hidden away....well, maybe just a slight sinking feeling, but I guess that I'm not letting it bother me too much because I figured that's exactly what he would do. I expected it, I guess. If he calls the number, he calls... and I'll deal with it. If he doesn't, well, we'll have to see how things go. Today, he is being especially sweet and affectionate to me. Probably because of the party, but maybe because of a little guilt sneaking in there? Then, too, I've told him that I knew he was cheating because of the hateful way he was treating me, so maybe he's trying to make sure I don't get suspicious. Who knows?<P>Anyway, I think that my resentment over his attitude has probably turned to detachment. I guess that's my own way of protecting my love for him.<P>Anyway, time will tell, won't it?<P>Again, thanks for the encouragement. Overall, I think I'm doing better than I was. It may be because I feel like I've finally done something that may break this stalemate between us.<P>BTW, this detachment I'm feeling is a big plus in helping me act normal. I think I'm doing a helluvan acting job right now! <P>[This message has been edited by Sweetpea (edited June 11, 2000).]<p>[This message has been edited by Sweetpea (edited June 11, 2000).]

Another little observation here....<P>H's usual habit is to empty his pockets, either on the kitchen counter or on his dresser before taking his shower. Since the party, however, he is leaving his stuff in his jeans pockets until he puts on a clean pair in the morning. Maybe because he thinks I might pick up his wallet and look through it if it was out in plain view???????<P>No phone call yet, but I think it'll come.... <p>[This message has been edited by Sweetpea (edited June 14, 2000).]

Sweetpea,<P>I really hope you are wrong on this one. Keep us posted, we are here no matter which way this thing goes.<P>Hugs,<P>Deb

Hmm...random thought...wonder if a call would have already been placed if it was the petite blonde w/big boobs instead?<P>Keep us advised. The deed has been done. Hang in there! <P>Laura