So, what is it about county music and affairs? That is the way I found out about my H friend! He was going to give her a county love CD and I figured out that all af a sudden he was totally into country music. Never listened to it once before. Now I see chris and K say county music was involved with their situation too. Maybe I should get a grant to do a study on this? Lora

Lora, <P>I've always liked Country music; wife too. I have to agree with the oddness of this though. My W's OM is now a country music fan. Makes me wonder. <P>Maybe they should spend less time on the love songs and more on the "Your lie'n, cheat'n, two time a double deal'n, mean mistreat'n loving heart" songs. <P>Or how about Patsy Cline's song that Jo Dee Messina now sings: "Somebody's going to give you a lesson in leaving somebody and their going to do to you what you've been doin and I hope that I'm around - to watch'm knock you down".<P>I got a bunch that come to mind. <P>Anyway, it is interesting.<P>SHA

Add me to the list. My H only listened to rock. After connecting with OW, then he bought & listened to all this country music--he never liked it before. And when he moved back in, I didn't see one country CD--he must have thrown them all away!

My H went out and bought a cd player for his truck and now all I can picture is them in the truck listening to these love songs the nights when he comes home late after being out with 'friends' He has a favorite love song and gets this sappy look on his face and I know he's thinking about her because the way he's been treating me lately, I know he's not thinking of me. Lora

I like all music except country and rap.<P>I was at my uncles hunting camp last week for days of country music. Some great tunes for someone going through this.<P>Songs like Going through the big D and it ain't Dallas, or thats my girl but thats not my truck...<P>Very uplifting.NOT. <P>In fact I'm only recently listening to any music. So many reminders. On discovery day I was sitting at my bench at work shaking, when on the radio comes our first song from our wedding. I sat in the fetal poaition in the bathroom for an hour. I, m glad I've moved past that. The pain does get more managable.<P>Now I make myself listen to love songs for an hour each morning. The one that gets me is Unbreak My Heart.<P>I know I'm a glutten for punishment, however it is thereputic, it helps keep me loving my W.<P>There are a few songs that don't like REO Speedwagon's Take It on The Run. I used to love that song now it's about my life. I do like Roll With The Changes, lotta hope in that one.<P>Sorry about hogging yuor thread I got carried away.<P>Bill<P>------------------<BR>BB<BR>

Add me to the list too!<P>My W is now really addicted to country music!<P>Before the affair... she simply abhored it... but the chatroom she got into had many people into country... and it wore her down...<P>Then of course when OM was into it... yuck!<P>Sorry... if you like country music... no offense. My personal feelings have been extremely biased... as have my kids!<P>JIM

OK Guys,<P>This is so wierd! When Val came back from our second last separation she was all of a sudden into country. Took a while to break her of the habit. You know the sad songs, my W left me, the dog died and the pick up has a flat, the red one with the rifle rack in the back window.<P>I follow the words of my master, Dee Snyder from Twisted Sister. "If it ain't metal, it's crap!"<P>Still stuck in the 70's<BR><P>------------------<BR>Wishing us all the Best.<P>Medic<P><BR>

OK, I guess I need to defend Country Music here. I was always a "soft rock" and "Rock and Roll" type of person. Then about 10 years ago, I started listening to Country. A lot of the music is really very good.<P>As a result of my W's infidelity, I have started listening to more of my "old" music because for a while the Country music was just too depressing.<P>Guess what, I am noticing that there is an awful lot of 70's and 80's music which is just a morally bankrupt as Country music can be sometimes. The only other option left is Classical, which I do enjoy by the way.<P>"Popular Music" can just be very difficult after infidelity. You start to hear things you never really heard before.<P>Sorry to be the descenting voice on this one.<P>God Bless

I've always liked country music, and so does my husband, but being country folks we would. You could get shot or beat up down here for not liking C&W!!! We live deep in the heart of Texas and Texas is C&W all the way. When we separated I couldn't listen to anything country - too painful! I know how you feel WilliamJ! I had to pull over to the shoulder on the freeway one time because a CW song that reminded me of my H came on, I was crying so hard I couldn't see. <P>I don't listen to country anymore. I only listen to Christian music. It is so uplifting and fills your heart with joy, not hurt. My H still listens to country - doesn't like my Christian radio station.

How do you spell 'depressing'?<P>C-O-U-N-T-R-Y--M-U-S-I-C<P>BUT, masochist that I am, I like it a lot! Sometimes, though, the lyrics touch too deep, and ya just gotta turn off the radio.<P>A sure cure for country music depression: Pop in a Deep Purple CD with 'Smoke on the Water'. Crank the windows down and the volume up! Play air guitar and steer with your knees!<P>"Da-da-dahhhh...da-da-da-dahhh...da-da-dahhh...dah-dahhh..."<P>Ya won't be depressed any more... unless you run off the road! <BR>

Lora, this is incredible!!!!!! We're into something here !!! <BR>I never really made any connection, but as I saw the title of your post I jumped. Neither me our H were really into country music, although we enjoy all kinds of music. <BR>Ow, loves country, it's her favorite, she told me herself, before the whole thing happened. The fact is that as the affair started, my H started to listen to a lot of country music and even bought a couple of cds. <BR>I just never thought that there were so many sharing this one thing!<P>Even more interesting, is the fact that ever since things start getting better, H never listened to the new cds anymore and a couple of weeks ago gave them to his sister that loves country music and get this: had an affair some years ago, separated from her H, and since then has been the ow many times.<BR>Coincidence! Probably, but strange hey?<BR>Maybe somebody could make a study on this one <P>Kat<P><P>------------------<BR>Each and everyone of us is deserving of a kind word, a gentle thought, and the gift of understanding.

hey, MEDIC....my H knows Dee Snyder. He used to manage a metal/rock band, and that's his chosen music type. I go for softer shades of rock usually, jazz, and ssshhhh, disco.<P>Does that mean...if country music is part of the infidelity equation, that I don't have to worry? <P>No offense to ANYone...but I just can't stand country music.

My H abhors Country Music. I could take it or leave it. When H left my best friend played Tammy Wynette's <I>Bedtime Stories</I> for me and I cried for 2 weeks straight. Then I went out and bought myself a copy. That song is how I hope my scenario plays out...I now have a new respect for Country music....and Tammy!<P>------------------<BR><B> <I> Black Heart </B> </I>

There must be something to this. My W spent a lot of time away from home with a "friend" and now she loves Country music. All of a sudden it's Garth Brooks and Alan Jackson. She even knows the words to the songs and sings along. Never did that before. She couldn't stand that kind of music when I played it. <P>Anyway, I gave her a C/W CD for Xmas last year and she hasn't even opened it. It had a lot of the songs she was singing when she came back home after her visit up north. <P>What does all of this mean?<P>PW

OK ya'll, I've got to weigh in on this topic. I was born a redneck and have in the past 10 years managed to get most of it out of my system except for country music. True, there are many depressing songs out there evidenced by the old joke: If you play a country album backwards, you get your truck, house, wife, and dog back. However, there are many songs, especially by the new "women's" movement in country [Dixie Chicks, Faith Hill, etc] that are very uplifting and empowering.<BR>I'm not advocated CM and I like many varieties of music, [Medic, I used to listen to "We're not going to take it" to get pumped before BBall games], but I've found that country has the most meaningful lyrics of any style of music I've heard.

Ah, Kat1, does that mean when I see signs of him giving up on the country music that It is a sign he is comming out of his addiction to her? I even found a hand written song lyrics from her to him about how they could never be just friends and how she wanted him evey night- gag. Lora